So we adopted a dog. Well a 9 month old puppy. I hate it. I now feel so tied down.

Discussion in 'General' started by mama_dragon, Nov 11, 2015.

  1. mama_dragon

    mama_dragon Well-Known Member

    So we adopted a dog.  Well a 9 month old puppy.  I hate it.  I now feel so tied down.  Its worse then having twin toddlers.  One of the boys doesn't like him all that well and the other is absolutely in love with him.  I want to give him back. 
    Overall he isn't a bad puppy.  Very sweet and loving.  He is crate trained since I can't have him tearing up the house while I am working.  And at this point he has to go in the crate at night otherwise I would get zero sleep.  He is high energy since he is a puppy and chews everything.  I feel like I spend ALL my time with the dog and less time with the boys. 
    Its just all too much.  Everyone thinks he is adorable and sweet and I really just want to go back to having no dog. 
    And I've had dogs.  This isn't my first puppy or dog.  I just don't think I can do this and feel I made a horrible choice.  I hate to let down the kid that likes the dog but I just don't think he fits our family. 
    Has anyone ever adopted a pet/dog and had to give them back?  He is very cute and I know another family would pick him.  In fact he likely would go to foster care.  There was a lady that was going to foster him if he had not been adopted.
  2. rissakaye

    rissakaye Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    If you want to give him back, I would say that sooner would be better than later.  Maybe let the kids have a guinea pig or a fish instead if they really want a pet.
    I will fully admit that we have a dog I do not want.  I'm allergic to her.  But my dh desperately wanted a hunting dog.  So she has stayed.  Me and her have learned to live together. My son feeds her and puts her out in the morning.  She stays in the backyard all day.  She comes in in the evening and then sleeps in her crate at night.  Despite the fact that I would rather be dogless, I have put the time into a relationship with her because I don't want a dog that only minds my dh.  I am the one that walks her because I walk every day anyway.  She generally minds me better than anyone else in the family.
    I will also admit that she is much better/calmer at 18 months old (now) than she was at 7 months old (when we got her).  She went from being an apartment dog to a dog with a big, fenced backyard where she can run and play and chase bunnies around.  She prefers her backyard to the house.  That has helped with her energy.  Also, once we figured out that she preferred real bones to chew on (the ones sold for dogs like cow knuckles) she quit trying to chew everything else.  
    But I agree that she does tie us down.  We have to keep her baby-gated into the family room with us in the evenings or under strict, constant supervision or she will run to the dining room to pee instead of going outside.  It's a pain.  And sometimes she still does pee on the carpet. I hate it.  
    If you don't think the dog is a good fit, I would probably just go ahead an give her back.  Maybe let the boys pick out a much lower maintenance pet and move on. I still have a hard time some days with the fact that a 20 lb furball is a higher priority than my allergies or my family room carpet.
  3. mama_dragon

    mama_dragon Well-Known Member

    I may actually have a solution for all of us.  My mom is willing to take him. She really likes him. She has a very big nice fenced backyard and she is home almost every day.  She is also trying to get out and walk more and she thinks a dog would be motivating.  Her old dog died recently and while she wasn't 100% ready for a new one she is not at all opposed to taking ours.
    3 people like this.
  4. rrodman

    rrodman Well-Known Member

    I'm glad it seems like it will work out. This is such a sore spot for me, as I spent years on the board of a humane society and know what happens to animals when people make poor decisions. I'm glad you are finding another option.
  5. AmynTony

    AmynTony Well-Known Member

    Tony and I had to give a dog back once.  We adopted a retired racing greyhound with HORRIFIC separation anxiety.  No one ever told us and we didn't do enough research.  At any rate the rescue was more than happy to have her back and she went to a retired couple with several dogs.  Win-Win.  
    as far as poor decisions are concerned, sometimes one doesn't know a pet is a poor decision until they come home and don't mesh with the family - as in our case - I figured the dog would sleep all day (as most of the websites we encountered said they did) and this poor animal actually broke out of a cage and destroyed our house - chewing wood doors, brass door knobs, ripped down curtains in every room and crapped in 7 places in the house.  
  6. mama_dragon

    mama_dragon Well-Known Member

    I don't think it was a poor decision.  I had been looking and thinking about getting a dog for a long time.  I found one I thought would work.  I've had 4 dogs in my lifetime so I am not new to owning a dog.  I love dogs and know exactly what wonderful companions they can be.  However I am new to owning a dog and being a single parent of two boys.  This dog was more than we were told and he needs a home were he can be the center of attention and have someone at home with him the majority of the time.  He jumps which means he needs a yard with a wood fence.  I am not sure I would trust him alone in our back yard.  I've had a collie, Brittany/border collie, Dalmatian (horrible dog and was not ours by choice but we kept and cared for him for 14 years), border collie/pointer.  We had each dog as a puppy.  So not new to me to have a puppy.  The Brittany/Border Collie had a spinal stroke at age 12.  He came home from the ER with an IV.  I had to carry him out to potty and stand him up.  I worked with him until he was able to walk again.  He died at age 16 1/2.  I understand what it is to have a pet as a family member.  The level of commitment involved. I was willing to be committed.  I truly wanted the boys to have a dog.  It is a great experience.  But this dog just doesn't fit us.  This is not something you can tell just reading about the dog or talking to the humane society.
    Thankfully my mother is mostly retired and she has a wood fenced back yard and time to give him the attention he needs. 
    Oh and my boys and I actually do volunteer once a month at the humane society.  They go in and socialize with the cats.  When they are older they want to do more but for now this is enough.They happened into it this summer when our cat died suddenly.   
  7. Rollergiraffe

    Rollergiraffe Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    That's a great solution. I was just coming here to say; although the puppy nonsense fades over time, the resentment of having a high maintenance dog (or cat, fish, rabbit, whatever) doesn't go away so easily. Glad you guys found a situation that makes everyone happy :)
    As an aside, I have considered re-homing my dog when she was at peak insanity. We did everything "right"..  training classes, crate training, and both of us are experienced dog owners, but the girl has ISSUES. She is sweet and loving, but her anxiety and energy are a dangerous combination in a house that is already full of chaos. I hated the idea of rehoming her, but dealing with her was too much on top of some of the more stressful things we have had to deal with. It didn't work out; she's still with us, and I am glad for that because the boys love her, but the whole experience has put me off dog ownership for quite a while.
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