Separate classes in daycare?

hi - I'm new to this site and hoping to get some advice or that kind of wisdom that only comes from experience! your thoughts welcome on the following situation....

I have 2 three-year old twin boys who will be 4 in December. They're in daycare fulltime in a great school with good teachers. They want to move up one of the boys, Daniel, into the 4 year old class now because they say "he is ready", (whatever that means). My other son, Henry, would then move up in January at the regular schedule.

Both boys, in my opinion, are at the same place developmentally as far as academic type stuff they learn at daycare (letters, numbers, time concepts, colors). Daniel tends to be more social and is probably more comfortable talking with adults so probably "tests" better. Henry tends to do his own thing and be more solitary but is the one who loves to learn things and tends to be the one who demonstrates what he's learned to me at home more. Other than Daniel being a little more social, I don't see huge differences in their emotional development.

Would love to hear your thoughts on good or bad experiences with separating twins at this age....maybe it's good for their social development? worried that it will make Henry feel like he's behind or not "a big boy" like Daniel but also don't want to keep them together just based on my fear of the unknown. We can do it on a trial basis so I'm not so worried about trying but am trying to anticipate what to expect.....

Amy

 

Welcome--and congrats on having two sets of twins!

My three year old boys are in daycare part time. They were moved from the 2 to 3 room together. They got moved before their thrd birthday at a time when it was convenient for the center to move them both at the same time. It probably would not have been a huge problem to move them separately as they still would have the chance to play together on the playgroud, see each other at lunch etc. If we moved separely I would probably just emphasize that they had a space in the next room for one and that they would get a chance to be in their own rooms for a little bit. I would want to put any stress on one being academically or otherwise ahead of the other so early in their school life.

 

When my boys started last year they were put into 2 different classes. There was an opening for 1 in each of them. One kid was with his own age group & the other was with kids about 6 months younger. To tell you the truth we never told the boys what the difference was in thier classes. They just knew the had different teachers in the same school. It worked great for us & no problems with them. Now that they are in VPK they are once again in different classes, but with kids thier own age.

 

:sign0016:

Your boys sound a lot like my girls. Gabby is eager to please the adults in her life. She is more social and enjoys group activities. Bianca is on par with Gabby knowledge wise, but would just as soon do a puzzel by herself than play a group game. She doesn't seem to care about winning praise and wants to do what she wants to do--not play with the group. While her language is fine, and in terms of pronunication actually better than her sisters, she's just as likely to express herself nonverbally as she is verbally. The teachers at our daycare center have commented to me that Gabby is the smarter one. What a horrible thing to say even if it were true! In our case, it's a state funded center and the teacher-student ratio is a little higher than ideal. So I think it is hard for them to see Bianca's talents. I personally would like it if the center were big enough to have two classes for them, because I worry about Bianca being compared to Gabby. But in your case I would choose not to move one up, because the "big kids" "little kids" thing. I think that would make matters worse not better. If the two clases were classified as being the same I think it would allow them to develop as individuals, but what parents want to avoid is one being see as "better" than the other, and in this particular case I'd worry that would happen.

 

I try to keep the mindset that twins are individuals, and their individual needs have to be met. If one really is more advanced than the other, he shouldn't be held back to try to spare his brother's feelings. At that age, I don't think the children would even understand the difference in the classes unless adults made a big deal about it.