My girls are 8 months old today! ...But still not STTN.

My girls are 8 months old today! I'd first like to thank the one thing that got me through the last 8 months - Mr. Caffeine. I couldn't have done it without you, buddy.

I'm loving every second of these two wonderful human beings - but it is still so hard that they are not sleeping thru the night. I know we've made progress - but for every 2 steps forward there is definitely a step back. If one is doing well one week, the next week it's her turn to be up a few times. They flip flop. Individually they both have had several STTN nights over the past month or so, but together I think it was only twice (and both times on Daddy's night shift! Of course!).

I know this has been discussed a zillion times, but when did your twins start regularly sleeping thru the night? Is 8 months a little long for multiple night wake-up problems? I know it could be teething - neither of them have popped out a tooth yet. Should I call the pediatrian? (PS they fall asleep on their own wonderfully, we have a great nightly routine and they know their cribs are for sleeping. They do, however, rely on those darn binkies I can't bring myself to take away).

 

Our boys are almost 10 months and still very off and on. Like you said, one will sleep through, and the other won't - then they flip flop. That happens a LOT, mostly because Gabriel is about 1-2 weeks behind on each tooth. So Michael doesn't sleep for about a week, gets a tooth, goes back to sleeping, then Gabriel doesn't sleep for about a week, gets the tooth, goes back to sleeping, and on and on. It really is a vicious cycle for us. They each have 7 teeth already - three of those all came within three weeks around 7-8 months, so there was very little sleeping then. Now they both have a cold. Seems like it is always something, and rarely do they BOTH make it through the night for us. We don't believe in total CIO, but we do let them cry for 10-15 minutes at night, after we have checked to make sure they aren't wet through their diaper, have a leg stuck, etc. - usually they will get themselves back to sleep. Sometimes we can give them the binky and they go right back to sleep, but that is hit or miss - we try very, very, very hard not to pick them up unless it is absolutely necessary, nor do we put them in bed with us except in extreme circumstances.

If it is teething, have you tried Tylenol or Motrin, or teething tablets? I know teething makes our guys VERY fussy. I am so envious of people whose kids don't get teeth until like a year old - I really think our guys would be great sleepers if they weren't getting so many teeth so fast. They got their first around 6 months and it has been almost non-stop ever since.

 

My girls are 9 months and one is now sleeping while the other is still waking up around 4am (last night she was up at 2am as well as 4). They flipped as well...the one who is now sleeping was the one who would constantly wake up and the one who is waking up was the one who used to sleep (frustrating!).

DS was 2 before he stopped night waking. It finally happened when we moved him into his big boy bed but by the point I was already pregnant with the girls and my sleep was disrupted due to the pregnancy! I have hope the girls will both work things out MUCH earlier than he did (I can't take another year and 3 months of nightly disrupted sleep ). I'd say while not ideal, night waking at 8 months is normal.

One thing I did with DS was put about half a dozen soothers in his crib (he was very reliant on his soother as well). When he would wake in the middle of the night there was usually at least one within reach so he could often put it back in and go back to sleep without DH or myself having to go in. Could be worth a try.

 

Wow I have to say I am lucky then, and you girls are prob going to want to crucify me when I tell you when mine started SSTN. Nathaniel was 4 weeks old, he would go down at 11 and be up at 6. William started at 9 weeks, he would go down at midnight and be up at 6. They started sleeping 7pm-8am at around 6 months of age. Good luck, I am sure they will start sleeping for you soon.

 

My guys were around the 9 month mark when they were sleeping through the night. I never thought it was goig to come!

 

Sounds a LOT like us... I try very hard not to pick them up either. Neither of my girls have any teeth, and I'm guessing it is what is waking them up at this point. We tried Motrin on G 2 weeks ago, and it worked. Now it's S that is up frequently, two nights in a row, so we'll give it a try with her tonight! Thanks.

 

Ok - well I can make it one more month...!

 

Unfortunately, my LO's didn't truely sttn until they were almost, gulp, 14 months old. Someone was always getting up and we would rock them for about 5 minutes and back down they went and were down for the night. Sometimes they would do that twice a night, but usually just once each at varying times. They slowly grew out of it and once we hit that time they were sttn it was heaven!!! Hang in there! They will get there!

 

Hi, our twins didn't STTN until a year. I kept hoping they would start soon, and I would try suggestions I read from other twin moms. It didn't happen for us. At a year I decided to stop waiting and force the issue. We did a modified CIO and it worked within a week. I felt like a new person after I started STTN for the first time in a year. My only regret is that we didn't do it sooner, but I really thought they would naturally just start sleeping longer.

 

It is normal for babies to wake throughout the night. Adults actually wake too - but we go right back to sleep. Some babies get used to getting help to go back to sleep - whereas others either naturally go back without needing help, or learn to do it themselves quickly. At 8 months old, our boys were still waking a couple of times and wanting a binky or for one of us to hold them. We knew that our boys knew how to soothe themselves and we could tell that they were just getting used to us helping them back to sleep. Plus, we were ready to make a change. We did CIO one night - we didn't go in at all because we knew if they saw us, they would just scream louder for us to pick them up. It was tough - VERY tough - but that was when their night wakings began to stop. There were nights where we knew they were teething and on those nights, we picked up whoever was teething and comforted them. I'm glad we waited until 8 months! That's my story. Good luck!

 

[quote name='E's 3' date='20 October 2010 - 08:35 AM' timestamp='1287581731' post='1711298']
One thing I did with DS was put about half a dozen soothers in his crib (he was very reliant on his soother as well). When he would wake in the middle of the night there was usually at least one within reach so he could often put it back in and go back to sleep without DH or myself having to go in. Could be worth a try.
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I have to say I love this idea! I read it on TS the other day (maybe you posted it in another thread, too, or someone did) and I started doing it. My boys love their pacis and if that's all they need and we don't have to get up at night and fumble around for one in the dark, it's worth it. Since I've been doing it, I swear I've heard them fuss and then find one on their own and settle back down. It's so cute, too, I'll go in the nursery in the morning and find them with pacis in their mouths and a couple in their hands...like they found some prizes!

 

I've struggled & stressed for MONTHS about the binkies, and just started throwing 4 of them in with little G each night (AFTER she falls asleep with just 1... she'll play with them if we put them all in while she's falling asleep, bless her). It does seem to help a little, she finds them now - when there was just 1 and she couldn't find it right away, she'd cry for us.

And for me, I am sure they would sleep better without them, & I have no issues with CIO in theory -- but I've decided I can't bear the thought of them being upset at day care and me not being there to comfort them. I know the binkies will help if htey are upset. And since I already hate leaving them at daycare, letting them keep the binkies gives me peace of mind. They love them. I have decided I'm not taking them away (yet). I'm a softie, I'll admit it. At least now I can stop stressing about them.

If it means a few more months (please God, let it be before they turn 2) of rotating shifts and getting sleep every other night - so be it.

Thanks again for the feedback. I know each baby (or each set of twins!) is/are different, but it's good to hear other people's stories & suggestions. THANK YOU! :give_rose:

 

I know it's not for everyone, but I am totally convinced that all three of my kids would not be STTN if it wasn't for CIO. I am a huge believer. I put my twins down with only a few minutes of rocking/soothing, they go right to sleep, and they sleep until morning (or at least, until what they consider to be morning which is really the crack of dawn, but that's another issue!). Anyway, I know it's not for everyone, but it was well worth it for us. I still live on caffeine though!

 

Can any of you recommend a book or a website on CIO. I am in the same boat as the first poster and want to do something.

I actually don't think that my boys know how to soothe themselves so any advice on that front would be welcome as well.

 

I'll look at my books - i have a few. But, here's my take on CIO. It sounds so harsh - but it doesn't have to be. I felt like it was my first time as a parent taking a step back and letting my boys work something out themselves. Now, that's not to say that I left them to cry and feel completely neglected. Up until 8 months, we gave our boys a lot of attention and help - rocking - soothing - and a feeling of security. Starting around 6 months, we would put them down drowsy but awake and let them try to fall asleep on their own - we would go in and do shushing, and patting, and we would ONLY pick up if one started crying intensly. If it was just fussing, we let them try to soothe themselves (pacifier, they would stroke their own hair, grunting, stroking the bed sheet). We still went in and picked them up in the middle of the night if they cried intensly, but if they were just fussing, we let them try to work it out. They got used to us picking them up - and that became routine. So by 8 months, we knew that they were relying on us too much, and that it was time for them to work it out themselves. If we even went in the room, we knew it would be worse, almost like teasing them. So, one night, that was it - we didn't go in. When you say that your boys don't know how to soothe themselves - remember that grunting and making noises can be them trying to soothe themselves.

 

In my opinion, if we were going to do a sleep method (I won't lie, I've been putting it off in the hopes the girls will work it out on their own) - Dr. Ferber's book is the best one (Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems). He's a doctor, first of all, and has done tons of research in children's sleep issues. The book goes into good, easy-to-understand detail on sleep patterns and what you can & cannot expect from your child. His method is also not a harsh CIO method - you go to your child every 5 minutes, then 10, then 15.

I've read some others - The Baby Whisperer and BabyWise for 2 - and the Dr. Sears book on the family bed which we decided wasn't for us.

To reiterate, I haven't tried any of them yet... My babies fall to sleep well & always have - they just wake up a lot in the middle of the night. We've made progress, but one of my little ones is now screaming-angry crying (last 3 nights) and wants to be picked up at 4am. If this continues, we may have to try the Ferber method.

 

FOr those wanting to try sleep options beside CIO the book the No Cry SLeep Solution is very helpful. Just wanted to throw that out there.

 

This is us too. Both of my babies know how to go to sleep at bedtime. Starting at 2m, they went down drowsy/awake at 6:45-7, and rarely do I have problems. They just won't soothe themselves back to sleep if they wake up in the early morning. Baby B sleeps much better swaddled, and Dad covers the night wakings but does not adequately swaddle. It easily comes undone. Soon as she wakes up unswaddled, she yowls at the top of her lungs. Baby A loves her paci, and when she wakes up 5/6 am it's for her paci. They are 4m and not able to purposely put things in their mouths yet.

At this point, I am very interested in what Ferber says about the early morning wakeups (before they are ready to get up for the day). In the past, I have mistakenly gotten them up after these wakeups, only to have them doze off a few minutes later. So I figure their day does not begin until at least 7 (and usually not until 7:30-8:00 after I've helped them back to sleep).