HELP! He's a bully at daycare at 15 months!

Discussion in 'The Toddler Years(1-3)' started by twinboymomma, Sep 6, 2007.

  1. twinboymomma

    twinboymomma Well-Known Member

    Well I picked up my guys from their sitter today and she tells me that one of my guys is a bully and wants to know how I want her to deal with it. They spend time in a little play yard and he pulls the other kids down and then steps on them and he also throws things at them. They are only 15 months old and these are my first kiddos, so I have NO idea how to deal with this. Let me tell ya, picking up your kids and have someone tell you one is a bully is not a great feeling. So PLEASE any suggestions or thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
    Thanks in advance
     
  2. Saiynee

    Saiynee Well-Known Member

    I don't think the term "bully" is appropraite for a 15 month old. He needs re-diraction and as the day care provider she is responsible for teaching him how to get along with others while he is there.
     
  3. twinboymomma

    twinboymomma Well-Known Member

    "I don't think the term "bully" is appropraite for a 15 month old." I agree with you here, this is just what she said. The weird thing is he is not like this at home. They have their moments, but hey, what kids don't. They fight over a toy and move on. I just posted another question in regards to possible my child care provider having too many kids in her care. Do you think this may have anything to do with it? (Not blaming her by ANY means) but maybe just too many kids and not enough attention?
     
  4. Saiynee

    Saiynee Well-Known Member

    Please don't misunderstand, I know it was the provider who used the word. I agree with you that she may have too many kids to watch and correct what each one is doing at all times. I would be taken back as well if someone called my child a bully at this young age.
     
  5. twinboymomma

    twinboymomma Well-Known Member

    Oh no, I didn't mean it to sound that I was offended, sorry. I appreciate your input, thank you very much!
     
  6. sharongl

    sharongl Well-Known Member

    I was going to suggest that he may be overwhelmed by the number of kids there. She just needs to be more vigiliant--because at 15 months, he doesn't really have the cognative ability to plan to do it, it is a reaction to something.
     
  7. Saiynee

    Saiynee Well-Known Member

    No harm, no foul! :icon_biggrin:
     
  8. Fay

    Fay Well-Known Member

    I would also wonder if she has too many kids in her care. If she knows that his behavior can affect the other children this way, then I think it's her responsibility to provide him with safe activities that keep his attention and to redirect him when his behavior is a problem. He just isn't old enough yet to be a "bully" or to know what is and is not acceptable play but redirecting him as needed will help keep him engaged and out of 'trouble'.
     
  9. Twin nanny

    Twin nanny Well-Known Member

    I have to agree with pp's who said that "bully" is NOT an appropriate label for a 15 month old. He is just too young to see things from any point of view but his own. Maybe he doesn't like being in the play yard or just needs more room. Your sitter ought to be able to just keep an eye on him and redirect when needed.

    ETA: OK I just read your other post about their daycare and it sounds like she has way too many kids. She may be a lovely person, but it is not good practice to be looking after that many children. No wonder she has trouble keeping an eye on them. I would look for a different place.
     
  10. twinboymomma

    twinboymomma Well-Known Member

    Thanks for your responses everyone, I appreciate all of your input. I agree with the fact that he is too young to be labelled a "bully" and redirection is a great start. I am going to talk to her about it more on Monday. Thanks again!
     
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