Goodbye Nap time

After sticker charts, rewards and numerous other strategies I am waving the white flag and accepting the fact that nap time is now gone. My kids have consistely gone to bed at 7pm then they wake at around 5am every morning, and after a month of putting them back to bed until my "official wake up time for them" of 630am, I am exhausted! My kids still nap for 1-2hrs (and I often have to wake them at 2hrs), but I think I need to get rid of the nap in order to have them sleep until 630am or 7am. I am a morning person, but not 5am!

So, today I thought ok, lets do quiet time for an hour (so I set their sun/moon clocks to come on at an hour so they know when they can come out), and my DS has done pretty good, he came out only a few times at the beginning, but DD she is a different story! She has come out of her room at least 45 times - and about 10x she says she had to pee (and she did pee each time), but she tries to wander around, go into her brother's room and disturb and corrupt him. I tried sitting outside her door and each time she came out (which was about 30 times just in 10 min) she is happy to come out and engage me even though I just tell her to go back to her room. I am almost loosing it! I also thought maybe I should lock her door, so I threatened it, and did it, and she screamed at the top her lungs for the entire 2 minutes I locked it - I just dont feel right locking her door for the entire hour, as I know her and I think it would result in 1hr of crying hysterically and yelling that she has to pee.

Here I sit with 10 min left to their quiet time and I am nearly in tears and stressed to the max, let me just say that I am a bit of a "sleep freak" so any sleep issues get to me quite quickly, but today in general has been hard with my 5am wake-up call. My DH travels so much and he is again not here for support and help, so I am on my own and I am turning into a very GRUMPY MUMMY!

 

For your DD, could you lay a blanket down with a pillow in front of the TV for an hour and put her favorite movie or show on. Or if you want her to stay in her room, have her take up some favorite books with her and put her small potty (if she has one) in there. Could you offer her some kind of reward system for staying in her room?

 

We don't do quiet time. They just take breaks from playing during the day watching tv.

 

We do an hour quiet time in their rooms and I set my son's stop light clock so he knows when it's over. I give them the option to lie down and rest/sleep - and if they do they get to stay up later. Otherwise they have to stay in and play quietly and then they go to bed early. We started this 2 weeks ago, and they seem to get it. My daughter is easy and will easily play the entire hour quietly. My son has a shorter attention span and gets bored by himself. But they have plenty of quiet toys and books to play with. I just threaten him about locking his door (which has been our way to get him to sleep and stay asleep at night). He hates it and would handle it the same way as your daughter - would absolutely scream the entire time at the door. And he'd also use the potty excuse. But if I let him out once to go, then that would be enough for me to not worry about. Any little trickle that he may be able to get out by going a second time 10 minutes later, can easly be held - and I doubt it causes the feeling of having to go. I don't believe I've actually had to lock him in for his quiet time, probably because I've done it enough at night so he knows I'll do it - but I would if I threatened it. As much as it sucks doing it, it would probably just be a day or so for her to learn to stay in her room, rather than having to go through what you are every day. Or try it for 15 minutes and give her another chance to stay in. If at that point she doesn't do it, lock it the rest of the time.

 

We haven't done quiet time in a long time, but I did it with my oldest 2, because I worked from home for a couple of hours/day. It was the perfect time for them to go down while DS2 napped, and I could get what I needed done. Our rule was that you had to stay on your bed and do something quiet. It could be books, drawing, puzzles, legos, whatever, but it had to be quiet. I think it's good to learn to be quiet by yourself and not constantly have to be entertained. Writing this makes me think that it would be a good thing to re-institute in our house. I had a friend before I was married who had 5 kids from 12 to 1 (the babies were twins), and they all had an hour of quiet time each day.

It does take some learning though, with little ones. If they're not used to being alone and quiet, it's not going to happen right away, especially not for an hour or longer. I would start with 10 minutes. Maybe set a timer and let them know that you'll do some fun thing when it's done, but only if they stay in their room and follow the rules. Also, make sure they've used the bathroom, got a drink, etc. so there's no excuse. But also set out some activities they can do to keep occupied for that time. When you're successful with that for a few days, up it to 20 minutes, and so on.

Good luck! I do believe it's as good for them as it is for you to have that down time.