Going In Public with Twins

I don't really mind when ppl ask ??'s about the boys b/c I think that twins are just to fascinating to others when they see them. It does kinda get old after a while but I just smile and answer their question. One of the ones I get the most is which one is older? They are only 1/2 a minute apart!! The ??'s are OK but I just hate it when they say, "better u than me" or "I bet your busy" that really drives me :crazy:

 

QUOTE(Charly @ Apr 13 2009, 11:27 AM) [snapback]1270758[/snapback]
Actually, there is a VERY rare case when twins can be opposite sexes and still carry identical DNA. I have no idea how or why, but it has happened before.

To quote Wikipedia:
Among monozygotic twins, in extremely rare cases, twins have been born with opposite sexes (one male, one female). The probability of this is so vanishingly small (only 3 documented cases[35]) that multiples having different sexes is universally accepted as a sound basis for a clinical determination that in utero multiples are not monozygotic. When monozygotic twins are born with different sexes it is because of chromosomal birth defects.

yes, and these are viewed in the medical community as medical anomalies, which have not according to record resulted in healthy viable babies. anything is possible in nature, given the chance for a fluke. that doesn't mean that the nature of identical twins includes opposite sex combinations.

hermaphrodites are a mathematical possibility, too. but you wouldn't expect someone to ask you if your baby was boy, girl, or both.

 

QUOTE(piccologirl @ Apr 16 2009, 10:25 AM) [snapback]1275522[/snapback]
hermaphrodites are a mathematical possibility, too. but you wouldn't expect someone to ask you if your baby was boy, girl, or both.


lol, good point!

 

QUOTE(Gimena @ Apr 15 2009, 09:25 AM) [snapback]1273859[/snapback]
I wish I had $1 for every time I head "you have your hands full" comment....

I do like the attention....most of the time when the comments are nice it is my "social intreaction" ...
I just laugh when I have my dd dress in pink and my ds in blue and they still ask which is the boy and which
is the girl...now my ds truyly has a boy look, even if I dress him in pink he would look like a boy,
and my dd is truly girly too.

I like the elderly comments the best.... and when people are polite and open doors....

I do get questions like "how do you do it?? (I just do-)
do you have help? (no, would you like to come help?)
"it is just so much work" (you are right, I'm returning one)- I would love to say that one day! (I"m kidding of course,
I would not have it any other way!) I stll melt when I'm in the snap and go and I talk and I get two smiles at the same time.

now I don't say don't thigs...I just think them

Today I got a pic of my friends triplets...and I told my dh " I just really can't imagine having 3- just ovewhealmed with the thought of it"
and he said "that is exactly what people with one baby feel when they see you with 2"--
That is funny you brought that up my cousin just had triplets last week and I think to myself I have no idea how she's going to do it. We are just hanging on to our wits w/2. God bless her and her sanity.

 

I think I should just make up some informational handouts to save time.

Thank you for your interest in my offspring. Here are some answers to frequently asked questions.

*Yes, they're twins.
*Yes, I'm sure (WTF?!).
*Yes, "only" two.
*They're both boys.
*No, they're not identical.
*That's not what identical means.
*I'm not going to explain it. If you think they're identical, fine, whatever.
*No, you can't hold them.
*No, you can't pet them.
*My reproductive plans are not your business.
*How we feed them is not your business.
*The manner of their birth is not your business.
*No, I'm not getting much sleep, thanks for asking.
*No, they don't comfort each other; wouldn't that be nice.

 

QUOTE(Phildonnia @ Apr 16 2009, 03:46 PM) [snapback]1276455[/snapback]
I think I should just make up some informational handouts to save time.

Thank you for your interest in my offspring. Here are some answers to frequently asked questions.

*Yes, they're twins.
*Yes, I'm sure (WTF?!).
*Yes, "only" two.
*They're both boys.
*No, they're not identical.
*That's not what identical means.
*I'm not going to explain it. If you think they're identical, fine, whatever.
*No, you can't hold them.
*No, you can't pet them.
*My reproductive plans are not your business.
*How we feed them is not your business.
*The manner of their birth is not your business.
*No, I'm not getting much sleep, thanks for asking.
*No, they don't comfort each other; wouldn't that be nice.


I've seen maternity shirts that say things like that - it's a girl, no it's not twins, yes I'm sure, I'm due in December, etc. Someone just needs to make a shirt for twin moms.

 

QUOTE(Phildonnia @ Apr 16 2009, 03:46 PM) [snapback]1276455[/snapback]
I think I should just make up some informational handouts to save time.

Thank you for your interest in my offspring. Here are some answers to frequently asked questions.

*Yes, they're twins.
*Yes, I'm sure (WTF?!).
*Yes, "only" two.
*They're both boys.
*No, they're not identical.
*That's not what identical means.
*I'm not going to explain it. If you think they're identical, fine, whatever.
*No, you can't hold them.
*No, you can't pet them.
*My reproductive plans are not your business.
*How we feed them is not your business.
*The manner of their birth is not your business.
*No, I'm not getting much sleep, thanks for asking.
*No, they don't comfort each other; wouldn't that be nice.


That's funny. I actually wrote a blog post about my FAQ: http://lizzybo.blogspot.com/2009/03/faq.html

I went out to Sears and OSH today to get photos and to look at dryers. I swear, nearly everyone I encountered had to talk to me about Octomom.

 

QUOTE(Lizzybo @ Apr 16 2009, 09:00 PM) [snapback]1276634[/snapback]
That's funny. I actually wrote a blog post about my FAQ: http://lizzybo.blogspot.com/2009/03/faq.html

I went out to Sears and OSH today to get photos and to look at dryers. I swear, nearly everyone I encountered had to talk to me about Octomom.

liked the blog entry. i wonder how many of us are blogging as an outlet during this first difficult/wonderful/crazy year with twins.

 

Related, though in a different category ... our "problem" is slightly different.

These days I don't get a lot of question because my Chinese isn't so great ... although I do start to understand some basics ...

In Hong Kong it's OK, but if we run into Chinese mainlanders, either here or in China ... things go wild. Cameras, phones and video cameras are coming out. Sometimes they "secretly" make pictures, other times they ask, sometimes they just stand behind them and have their pictures taken, especially when I try to make some family photos. Having 3 kids is a lot for them already (I can understand "3 kids" everywhere). I do realize they're all blond, nice and chubby, good looking (especially my twin girl is extremely popular) but I have seen the thumbs up more than a thousand times and an equal number of pictures were taken. My twin girl voluntarily poses, smiles and waves (grrrrrr ... and they love it!). I had people carry them through a cave in China, carrying the stroller + the kids down 100 of steps in Taiwan (quite helpful) ... every time I think I've seen it all, but it doesn't seem to stop. You give them a fingertip and before you know it, in seconds, the whole busload is there. I've literally had people throwing themselves in front of my stroller ... to make a picture, following us through parks. We even had Chinese army guys getting their cameras out.

So these days it's not the words but what they do. Luckily in Hong Kong it's not too bad, and our building is full of expats including around 15 sets of twins, but mainland Chinese are a completely different world. Just get the kids lined up for a family picture is asking for trouble. However, I will continue to make pictures of them ... and pay a price.

http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p57468335.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058064.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058130.html

Here we were waiting for the rest of our group (and they were late ... very late), this was the worst we ever saw it.
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058115.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058116.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058117.html

And yes, sometimes, we just try to smile about it, and now I can laugh about it. What else can you do? For them it's probably something they have never seen before in their entire life ... blond, chubby, boy / girl (extra luck in China) twins!

 

QUOTE(Mom2SofieAndTwins @ Apr 17 2009, 07:47 AM) [snapback]1277338[/snapback]
Related, though in a different category ... our "problem" is slightly different.

These days I don't get a lot of question because my Chinese isn't so great ... although I do start to understand some basics ...

In Hong Kong it's OK, but if we run into Chinese mainlanders, either here or in China ... things go wild. Cameras, phones and video cameras are coming out. Sometimes they "secretly" make pictures, other times they ask, sometimes they just stand behind them and have their pictures taken, especially when I try to make some family photos. Having 3 kids is a lot for them already (I can understand "3 kids" everywhere). I do realize they're all blond, nice and chubby, good looking (especially my twin girl is extremely popular) but I have seen the thumbs up more than a thousand times and an equal number of pictures were taken. My twin girl voluntarily poses, smiles and waves (grrrrrr ... and they love it!). I had people carry them through a cave in China, carrying the stroller + the kids down 100 of steps in Taiwan (quite helpful) ... every time I think I've seen it all, but it doesn't seem to stop. You give them a fingertip and before you know it, in seconds, the whole busload is there. I've literally had people throwing themselves in front of my stroller ... to make a picture, following us through parks. We even had Chinese army guys getting their cameras out.

So these days it's not the words but what they do. Luckily in Hong Kong it's not too bad, and our building is full of expats including around 15 sets of twins, but mainland Chinese are a completely different world. Just get the kids lined up for a family picture is asking for trouble. However, I will continue to make pictures of them ... and pay a price.

http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p57468335.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058064.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058130.html

Here we were waiting for the rest of our group (and they were late ... very late), this was the worst we ever saw it.
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058115.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058116.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058117.html

And yes, sometimes, we just try to smile about it, and now I can laugh about it. What else can you do? For them it's probably something they have never seen before in their entire life ... blond, chubby, boy / girl (extra luck in China) twins!


That's too funny! I have had some similar experiences here, though not nearly to that extent. There is a large Chinese community here and I've learned that twins are considered very good luck. One day when checking out at Ikea, I turned and noticed a large circle had formed around my babies and people were taking photos. The cashier looked dumbstruck; he'd never seen anything like it.

It doesn't bother me, though. I'm delighted that my boys spread such joy. I call them "my magic."

 

QUOTE(Lizzybo @ Apr 17 2009, 02:57 PM) [snapback]1277355[/snapback]
That's too funny! I have had some similar experiences here, though not nearly to that extent. There is a large Chinese community here and I've learned that twins are considered very good luck. One day when checking out at Ikea, I turned and noticed a large circle had formed around my babies and people were taking photos. The cashier looked dumbstruck; he'd never seen anything like it.

It doesn't bother me, though. I'm delighted that my boys spread such joy. I call them "my magic."


That happens here quite frequently!

 

I've noticed people commenting on how calm I am. I'm thinking, what do you want me to be like-hair sticking out with bags under my eyes?!?!

 

once a rather nosy lady asked me how far apart they were, oh about two inches i replied.
when they ask me if my they are identical, i say yes, his penis looks just like her vagina.
i'm surprised people ask, because my boy is dark like his daddy, an my girl is light like me... not to mention the differance in size... shes got over a pound on him.

 

QUOTE(kittenkills @ Apr 18 2009, 01:57 AM) [snapback]1278562[/snapback]
once a rather nosy lady asked me how far apart they were, oh about two inches i replied.
when they ask me if my they are identical, i say yes, his penis looks just like her vagina.
i'm surprised people ask, because my boy is dark like his daddy, an my girl is light like me... not to mention the differance in size... shes got over a pound on him.

:lol: That's funny. I once had someone ask me if I could tell them apart without their clothes on. I replied, That's actually the easiest, cause all I have to do is look at their boy/ girl parts. :lol: I have people ask me all the time how I tell them apart, and they don't look anything alike. She's very fair, and he's dark, and he weighs 2 more lbs than she.

 

Leaving the hospital we were asked "are they twins?" I've decided my response is "No, it was birth one get one day."

Oh, and the "you're not going to get any sleep" comments are making me more annoyed than not getting any sleep.

 

QUOTE(writerswife @ Apr 19 2009, 05:49 PM) [snapback]1280332[/snapback]
Leaving the hospital we were asked "are they twins?" I've decided my response is "No, it was birth one get one day."

Oh, and the "you're not going to get any sleep" comments are making me more annoyed than not getting any sleep.


I thought it was odd that in the months before giving birth everyone thought it was important to advise me to get lots of sleep before they were born because I wouldn't sleep after... like we can stockpile all that sleep and save it up so we won't suffer so much later. Yeah, uh huh, and like it's so easy to sleep when you're humongous, can't breathe or move, and full of stomach acid.

Oh, and my husband's response to "are they twins?" is "no, you're drunk and seeing double."

 

The comments actually don't bother me at all...yet. It is funny the things people say or ask. I always get the, "You have your hands full" and then I tell them that I have a 17 month old too. I love the reaction. I also get the are they identical, how do you tell them apart, and everyone always asks me what I think of the Octomom. The only question that I get floored by is when I am asked if they were conceived through fertility treatments. It isn't like I have HOMs or anything. I just don't see how a person can get so personal with a stranger.

 

Me and my girls went to Walmart this morning for the first time. I usually avoid the big stores like that. But I had several people stop me to ask all the same dumb questions (are they twins and such). I was thinking on the way home about how I've always been shy and hate talking to people I don't know, so its amazing to me that God saw fit to give me twins. You would think he would have chose someone better able to talk to people. I wouldn't trade it for anything though.

 

We were in for their 2 month check up and the nurse asked if my boy-girl twins were identical. Neither my husband or I felt the need to go into how they couldn't be identical twins with someone who should be educated in that area. She did say..."oh, but they look so much alike".
Yikes! I guess somethings are just more difficult for some people to understand!

 

I'm one who isn't bothered by the usual comments...I figure that the people are just curious and trying to be nice. But this weekend I had a lady say to me, "You have my deepest sympathy." What?!? I didn't reply, I was so floored by that comment. I guess she was trying to be nice, but we were at the ZOO, not a funeral.

 

QUOTE(Lizzybo @ Apr 19 2009, 09:16 PM) [snapback]1280368[/snapback]
I thought it was odd that in the months before giving birth everyone thought it was important to advise me to get lots of sleep before they were born because I wouldn't sleep after... like we can stockpile all that sleep and save it up so we won't suffer so much later. Yeah, uh huh, and like it's so easy to sleep when you're humongous, can't breathe or move, and full of stomach acid.

Oh, and my husband's response to "are they twins?" is "no, you're drunk and seeing double."


YES! That advice bugged me, too! (And hello, who sleeps well while pregnant--esp hugely pregnant with twins--anyway??)

And I LOVE your husband's response!! ROFL!!!

 

QUOTE(Mom2SofieAndTwins @ Apr 17 2009, 10:47 AM) [snapback]1277338[/snapback]
Related, though in a different category ... our "problem" is slightly different.

These days I don't get a lot of question because my Chinese isn't so great ... although I do start to understand some basics ...

In Hong Kong it's OK, but if we run into Chinese mainlanders, either here or in China ... things go wild. Cameras, phones and video cameras are coming out. Sometimes they "secretly" make pictures, other times they ask, sometimes they just stand behind them and have their pictures taken, especially when I try to make some family photos. Having 3 kids is a lot for them already (I can understand "3 kids" everywhere). I do realize they're all blond, nice and chubby, good looking (especially my twin girl is extremely popular) but I have seen the thumbs up more than a thousand times and an equal number of pictures were taken. My twin girl voluntarily poses, smiles and waves (grrrrrr ... and they love it!). I had people carry them through a cave in China, carrying the stroller + the kids down 100 of steps in Taiwan (quite helpful) ... every time I think I've seen it all, but it doesn't seem to stop. You give them a fingertip and before you know it, in seconds, the whole busload is there. I've literally had people throwing themselves in front of my stroller ... to make a picture, following us through parks. We even had Chinese army guys getting their cameras out.

So these days it's not the words but what they do. Luckily in Hong Kong it's not too bad, and our building is full of expats including around 15 sets of twins, but mainland Chinese are a completely different world. Just get the kids lined up for a family picture is asking for trouble. However, I will continue to make pictures of them ... and pay a price.

http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p57468335.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058064.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058130.html

Here we were waiting for the rest of our group (and they were late ... very late), this was the worst we ever saw it.
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058115.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058116.html
http://franca-tobias.fotopic.net/p55058117.html

And yes, sometimes, we just try to smile about it, and now I can laugh about it. What else can you do? For them it's probably something they have never seen before in their entire life ... blond, chubby, boy / girl (extra luck in China) twins!



Oh, goodness ... I lived in Mainland China for a year, Taiwan for 4+ years, and visited Hong Kong a dozen times ... I got loads of staring, comments, "Can I take photo with you?" etc. just as a single American adult; I can only imagine what it's like with 3 blonde children, including B-G twins! Your pics bring back memories ... (esp when I visited small villages!) Sounds like your little ones handle it well!

 

I never understood these types of threads. Is it really that bad? People are just curious and I smile and answer their questions. I'm just happy my twins are healthy. I can think of worse things in life than people asking questions. Think about what it would be like to have more than two at a time. You would have questions too.

 

QUOTE(IL34 @ Apr 21 2009, 11:12 AM) [snapback]1282660[/snapback]
I never understood these types of threads. Is it really that bad? People are just curious and I smile and answer their questions. I'm just happy my twins are healthy. I can think of worse things in life than people asking questions. Think about what it would be like to have more than two at a time. You would have questions too.


I never thought of the posts in this thread as complaints, just marveling about it and wondering if we all go through the same thing. I think most of us like the special kind of "magic" our babies spread when we go out.

 

QUOTE(IL34 @ Apr 21 2009, 02:12 PM) [snapback]1282660[/snapback]
I never understood these types of threads. Is it really that bad? People are just curious and I smile and answer their questions. I'm just happy my twins are healthy. I can think of worse things in life than people asking questions. Think about what it would be like to have more than two at a time. You would have questions too.

i'm not a big fan of the implication that those who voice frustrations are somehow losing sight of their gratitude that their children are healthy. i fail to see how one thing is related to the other, so your comment just seems holier than thou, IMHO.

 

I'm actually enjoying the attention, I enjoy showing off my adorable babes! Yes, I get the stupid comments too, but I just smile and re-iterate the same old answers over and over! lmao

 

I just find it funny how it's always the same questions.

 

QUOTE(piccologirl @ Apr 21 2009, 02:54 PM) [snapback]1282823[/snapback]
i'm not a big fan of the implication that those who voice frustrations are somehow losing sight of their gratitude that their children are healthy. i fail to see how one thing is related to the other, so your comment just seems holier than thou, IMHO.


Relax. I just think there are bigger things to be frustrated about in life. I’m just trying to put it in a different perspective for you. I enjoy speaking to people and answering all their questions. You need to have tolerance. Just because you did not get the point I was trying to make doesn't make me "holier than thou". Seriously.

 

QUOTE(Lizzybo @ Apr 21 2009, 06:43 PM) [snapback]1282712[/snapback]
I never thought of the posts in this thread as complaints, just marveling about it and wondering if we all go through the same thing. I think most of us like the special kind of "magic" our babies spread when we go out.

Agree.

I am by no means "frustrated" about these comments ... more amazed! Amazed about 100 people taking photographs of my children, amazed about the attention they get. Frustrated? No. Annoyed? Sometimes ... if I need to go from A to B and it's basically made impossible (and at the same time I need to keep all 3 children safe especially near roads, etc.).

I am sure everybody in this thread has bigger things to worry and be frustrated about ... but that doesn't mean we can't share our experiences, good & bad. Not all threads are my cup of tea but if so, I don't read or don't reply.

 

i get all the usual stuff. it doesn't really bother me. but my MOM... she LIVES for the comments! EVERY TIME we take the girls somewhere, my mom has to push the cart/stroller, and she tries to make eye contact with everyone, just fishing for comments lol!