circumcision

It was really interesting reading this thread. I always thought that people circumcised for religious reasons and was totally unaware that people did it for hygiene reasons! Huge surprise to me. In England it just isn't done. Not even discussed - not an issue. I don't know anyone who has it done (well I know they're not actually going to tell me out of the blue but you know what I mean!). I also don't know anyone who has problems keeping their penis clean and healthy! I have to say that I am really surprised people get it done for this reason alone. Of course its your decision but men were built that way for a reason - the human body is amazing - why interfere?

 

We had our son circ. We did it because it was what we did in my family as a norm and DH was okay with it. We didn't give it much thought, in fact, I brought it up to him in the hospital and he said yeah do it.

 

Our older DS is - we really had a hard time making the decision and the day before he was discharged they came to us and said we either need to do it now and not do it while he' here. In the end, we chose to have the circ. done - and while I don't necessarily regret it - I wish that we had chosen not to.

Our twin boys are not circ'd. We had 3.5 more years to do the research and just felt it was unnecessary. Our opinion just got much more solid when they were born 5 weeks early and honestly, their parts were so small (looked like an earth worm!) - that neither of us, even if we had wanted to circ. them, could have let ANYONE cut on something that small. So, we brought them home uncirc'd - talk to the ped. who agreed it was unnecessary - and that's that.

 

Our boys are not circ'd. It is not medically necessary and I did not feel right cutting things off. If they want to have it done when they are older I am more then happy to pay for it. I wanted it to be their decision, not mine.

 

My DH is not, therefore neither of my DS are either.
I would not want my DS to see his Dad and wonder why he looked "different".

We have never had any issues with my older son (he's 14 now) and his cleanliness or any other issues with his not being circumsized. (Complications are SO rare that having it done to "prevent" something is like loping off our breast to prevent breast cancer...) DS actually thinks it's pretty cool since a lot of the other guys on the football team are not either. Seems to be a trend in the US now of not doing it.

On a personal note, I had a REALLY hard time giving birth and then immediately PURPOSELY hurting him for cosmetic reasons.

 

It is a personal decision.

I did have my son done. I chose to do it because of problems like you mentioned happening to your brother. He never even seemed to notice that it had happened. i was always so nervous that i might be hurting him putting the antibiotic stuff on his penis. But he never even shown any reaction at all. Right after he had had it done they brought him to me and said he didn't even cry.

I have heard of older children wnting it done and experiencing horrible pain.

Again it is a personal decision and I would never tell anyone to do it or not do it.

 

Thanks for all the great replies!! I found out some things I didn't know, or considered before. This is an odd medical topic, cause besides your husband, who do you talk to about first hand experience? I mean, you don't exactly ask just anyone, "How does your penis look? Do you like it that way?" Like a lot of you said, sometimes you don't even know about your own family members.

 

QUOTE(PJ @ Oct 8 2008, 01:38 PM) [snapback]1017689[/snapback]
My boys are not done. I think it's an unnecessary procedure (in most cases) and there has been a big decline in having it done over the years. I think since it's less common now, there will not be teasing in locker rooms anymore (did that ever happen??). As for it being less hygenic..please do some research. I think people don't research it and just do it because that was what was done in the "olden days".



This is exactly why my son was not circumcised either. Good post.

ETA: My DH is circumcised, but after doing the research together we agreed that just was not a good enough reason to circumcise our son.

 

I had DS done but after it was done, I felt like a terrible mother for putting my baby through such pain for superficial reasons (we didn't do it for religious reasons, just so he'd look like DH). So I vowed not to cir. any more boys, but so far it we've only had girls since.

 

Our DS is circumsized. It wasn't something I had researched that much, I did a ton of research on getting through the pregnancy and that was about all I could do, and DH preferred it.

I just wanted to comment on how gracious everyone has been on this thread--I know that this can be a really emotional issue, something people have invested a lot in, and I'm really proud of the way everyone has been kind in their presentation of their own viewpoings.

 

I didn't want to do it but left it up to Dh. It was really important to him (cultural thing) so I went along with it (sort of). I totally regret it!! In our case we took them both and only one of them was able to get it done because the other penis was to buried. They said bring him back in a month but it hadn't come out any more. They are now 5.5 months old and I don't see him being able to get circumsized till he's at least two. So he will probably stay uncircumsized. So now we have one of each which really bothers me.

 

This is a great post with lots of great responses.. All 3 of our sons are not done we just thought it was not medically needed, although I did have the docotrs check at birth to make sure they did not need it..

In response to the "look like daddy" comments, I would bet by the time they notice any serious differences, they'd be too old to care. And they'd probably not care to see their dads in the buff! :nea: They'd be more upset at having seen their dad naked than not having matching penis'.

And for the teaseing in locker rooms, maybe we could all send our (uncircumsized) boys to england! They wouldn't be the minority there! Hehehe! :good:

It truly is a very personal choice to make.

Hugs, Mandy

 

QUOTE(Lesley Anne @ Oct 8 2008, 12:14 PM) [snapback]1017507[/snapback]
It is a personal decision and you are a great mom for putting some serious thought into it!
We did circumcise our son and I guess we did because my dh is and took into account the medical benefits of it. I was a little on the fence about it because I didnt want to cause my ds any unneccesary pain and felt it was cosmetic...but it turned out fine, he hardly noticed and it healed great-havent looked back since.
Good luck, I am sure other ladies will have better advice on this...


Ditto.

 

we chose to have both boys circumcised. we felt a certain cultural normality was an important factor and their father was strongly in favor of it.

there are studies that suggest that the risk of sexually transmitted disease infection (HPV and HIV, for example) is higher in uncircumcised males. and although penile cancer is rare, there are studies that show that the risk is dramatically reduced in circumcised males. ultimately, though, none of the research is strong enough to make the procedure necessary. it's all about weighing risk, evaluating the value of risk reduction, and deciding what you're comfortable with emotionally. for me, i felt like the potential risk reduction was valuable enough to have it done.

i will say that it was incredibly difficult to deal with the reality of it, when i saw what the immediate aftermath of the procedure looked like. it's one thing to make the decision and feel comfortable with it, it's quite another to look at your little baby's bright red (and possibly still bleeding) penis and feel like you made the right decision. neither of our boys seemed to experience any discomfort and the healing process was clean and relatively fast. still, the first time i saw that gauze peeled back and really took in the reality of what had been done, i burst into tears. i actually cried several times about it that first day.

i wouldn't say i necessarily regret it. it's behind us and as i said the boys didn't seem uncomfortable. they seemed grumpier about their vaccines, actually. still, it was a much harder decision to live with initially than i thought it would be.

 

We were planning on circ'ing him, but then after he was born early and had to spend a week in the NICU getting constantly poked, prodded, etc. I didn't have the heart to add another procedure if it was unnecessary. Now I am really glad we didn't do it, and here are the reasons I am glad:

1) Circ'ing is becoming less popular, so by the time he is school-age many of his peers (our nurse at the hospital said it was about 50% at least in our area) will be like him. So with strength in numbers the teasing thing shouldn't be an issue.

2) An uncirc'ed penis has a little more in common with a woman's privates, if you know what I mean, so I hope it will make him more empathetic/appreciative of women someday. (I will NEVER EVER tell him that!)

3) This is the way God/the Goddess made him. If we're going to be the All Natural Organic Green Family this is more in line with that vision.

Good Luck with your decision. Generally people end up being happy with their decision whatever they decide, it seems. People do get very passionate about this though!

 

QUOTE(joannabug @ Oct 9 2008, 01:26 PM) [snapback]1019332[/snapback]
I just wanted to comment on how gracious everyone has been on this thread--I know that this can be a really emotional issue, something people have invested a lot in, and I'm really proud of the way everyone has been kind in their presentation of their own viewpoings.


:good: This has been a great discussion!

 

We didn't. We didn't think it necessary and seemed more of a hazard than a benefit. I didn't have the heart to do it to my little guys. Dh isn't circumcised, neither are the majority of the world's men and in some areas of the US, circumcision is now heading toward the minority. I'm really happy with our decision to leave our boys intact.

 

QUOTE(SweetGirl @ Oct 9 2008, 07:12 PM) [snapback]1019698[/snapback]
:good: This has been a great discussion!


I agree. All is really well and thought out. Very Informative..

 

QUOTE(Lizzybo @ Oct 10 2008, 12:58 AM) [snapback]1019866[/snapback]
We didn't. We didn't think it necessary and seemed more of a hazard than a benefit. I didn't have the heart to do it to my little guys. Dh isn't circumcised, neither are the majority of the world's men and in some areas of the US, circumcision is now heading toward the minority. I'm really happy with our decision to leave our boys intact.

Ditto here!

To the pp with the statement on ovarian cancer... is there some data you have to back that up??

 

I guess I never really thought of not doing it. Everyone in my family and Dh is so I never considered not having it done until it came down to the apt and the thought of them being in so much pain made me cry. It turned out to not be so bad and they were numb. Good luck on whatever you decide

 

QUOTE(kma13 @ Oct 9 2008, 09:58 PM) [snapback]1019938[/snapback]
To the pp with the statement on ovarian cancer... is there some data you have to back that up??

i suspect it's similar to the evidence on penile cancer. ultimately it has nothing to do with the foreskin being left intact. the correlation is more of a hygiene issue. in other words, men who aren't properly instructed on how to keep the area clean may not be washing away the build up of toxins and the lack of hygiene can eventually lead to cellular disruption. i suppose there may be a tenuous connection with these men possibly transferring the unhygienic byproducts to their sexual partners. that's just a guess, though.

i would say either way the evidence would be highly debatable. remember, correlation does not equal causation. just because researchers found a quantifiable statistical connection, that doesn't mean the cause is immediately obvious.

 

It isn´t custom or common practice to do this where I´m from or where I live so, no, we haven´t and I wouldn´t. Good luck with your decision.

 

We did not have our boys done... it didn't even come into the equation... In our country, circumcision is radicly on the decline... with the nearest doctor to us being 4 hours away that will even consider the operation. I just believe that we are born the way we should be... is there any part of the female body that 'needs' to be cut off?.. GL with your decision... just remember that it is YOUR decision... great that you are asking for advice.. just take with you the advice that sits well with you...

 

My DH is done so he wanted our boys done too. I am very anti circumcision so needdless to say I was quite vocal on the topic. I showed DH a documentry where they did this procedure to a baby I never heard another word from him on the topic. I would say do as you please but please be educated fully before you choose either way.

 

My DH and I put alot of thought into the decision and talked to alot of people. In the end, we listened to two friends who were both doctors (one was a urologist). They said that if we are going to circumcise, it should be done by a pediatric urologist. They have heard of too many botched circumcisions when someone other than a pediatric urologist performed the procedure. BUT a pediatric urologist probably will not do it at birth and would wait until the child was about a year old.

So we delayed the decision until our kids were 1 year old. But by then, we were convinced that we did NOT want to circumcise our boys. For one thing, we met too many parents who had to take their boys back for a "correction" because the circumcision had gone badly. When we talked to these parents, they all said they wished they had never done it. They felt like the health benefit was minimal and it was done more for cosmetic reasons and it wasn't worth the pain and the risk. Also, it wasn't too hard to clean the penis, so I was pretty confident that I can keep it clean. We also saw how healthy and happy our kids are and just didn't want to put them through an unnecessary medical procedure.

 

two boys here ... no circ. DH and I had the discussion when I was PG with DD#2 ... and had decided NOT to circ any of our boys. For us, it's a needless cosmetic, as well as painful procedure. DH is circ'ed, for what it's worth.
I'm a nurse, and in my personal clinical experience, it doesn't make a bit of difference in hygiene.

 

My sons are not because they were preemies and they would have had to be circumsized in the doctors office which I thought was not very hygenic and I also couldn't bear the thought of having it done by that point. Interestingly enough my DH is European and is not circ'd. I left the initial decision up to him and he wanted to have them circ'd. I was on the fence and did some research (there is a site called www.nocirc.org that I found that just gave some facts and tips for care of the uncirc'd genitalia etc. They are very biased though so I wouldn't use this as your only resource. After talking to my pediatrician and doing my own research I asked my DH if it was ok to leave them be for the time and he agreed. I figure if later on down the line they encounter problems or frequent UTI's etc. then we can do it then ( after a year is the earliest they will do it if you miss the window and then they have to be put under general anesthesia). It is a personal choice but there is a lot of info out there about it these days. Good luck in your decision making

 

Are boys are not. Left the decision up to their dad...he is not. As long as they are taught hygiene, there should be no issues there. I guess yes a boy could get teased about in the locker room, but the way I see it is kids are going to get teased about one thing or another...just gotta teach them a good come back

Dianna