Anyone move closer to family?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy Help' started by ems1981, Feb 7, 2015.

  1. ems1981

    ems1981 New Member

    We live about a 6 hour flight from my family and now knowing I'm carrying twins makes me wanna move back to be near them. The hubby wants to stay put but we have no family here and only a few friends. I'm really struggling with the thought of having twins and having no one here to help. Of course the hubby will help out but I'd like some family members nearby too.

    Anyone actually made the move closer to family once they found out they were having twins?
     
  2. Katheros

    Katheros Well-Known Member

    It's something I would seriously consider.  There's so many personal factors, it's hard to say yes I would, or no I wouldn't, ya know?   My husband is in the military so we have very little choice about where we live.  My twins were born while I still lived back home, but with the other two we were far away from home.  It honestly can be a huge issue.  I'm constantly worried about if one kid gets hurt and I have to take him to the ER, I have no one to stay with the others.  I have no help with running kids back and for to school or activities or friends house.   It's a lot to consider and it's a huge decision. 
     
  3. cheezewhiz24

    cheezewhiz24 Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    Do you love where you currently live? If so, I'd look at establishing some connections and relationships in my new city. If you don't and KNOW your family back home would actually be helpful, then possibly.
     
    2 people like this.
  4. Mrs.C

    Mrs.C New Member

    being pregnant with twins made me want to be closer to family as well. I was lpoking at the impending financial impact of having two babies was going to put on myself and my husband. I am the higher earning salary and knowing I was not going back to work right away once the babies are born led to our decision to move closer to family for more support. His mother has offered to babysit when I do return to work part time and his grandmother has given us her home to reduce any financial burdens. It was the best thing that could ever happen to us. The stress has really been relieved and has allowed us to enjoy the last few weeks of this pregnancy. And I am so grateful to have the extra help around while my husband is at work because getting the little things done right now has become a huge task. 37 weeks Preg with non Identical girls, 50 pounds heavier and can't reach my feet anymore makes for a tiring day.
     
  5. Rollergiraffe

    Rollergiraffe Well-Known Member TS Moderator

    If your family is truly helpful I would consider it. But, if moving is difficult, definitely look for twins or multiples associations in your area, find church groups, babysitters, organize the neighbors, find play groups, talk to your doctor about community resources. All these are great things to help you connect with help. We had an organization locally that would send a free babysitter once a week for the first 6 months of their lives with a doctors referral. There is post-partum doulas to help you out in the early days... lots of options if you decide to stay. The important thing is that you set up your resources as well as you can ahead of time so you don't feel as if you are going at it alone.
     
    If you do have family come and help, or move closer to them, also be mindful of setting boundaries about what is actually helpful to you. You WILL be able to manage it, it is just a matter of figuring out what is available to you.
     
  6. Bestian

    Bestian Active Member

    We tried to move in with parents recently to get some help but only managed to get in a huge fight and thinking about a divorce.
     
  7. WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot

    WhiskeyTangoFoxtrot Active Member

    Wow, that doesn't sound good. Are you sure you want a divorce? Especially if you have kids, it will be extremely hard for both parents and kids, and it might traumatize them. You can click here for a good divorce lawyer, but I hope you'll figure everything out, and there will be no need for you to contact a lawyer.
     
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