WWYD? One sick, one not

Bea has been very ill with a virus - coughing, stuffy nose, fever. Ainsley seems to be fine. Actually, Ainsley is the only one in the family not sick right now. I am keeping them both home from preschool today. The reason I am not sending Ainsley is because I know it's inevitable she will get it, and I'm sure with all of us being sick, she's carrying the virus and I feel like it wouldn't be right to send her and get the other kids sick. But, part of me feels bad that she doesn't get to go to preschool, which she loves, when she's not sick. Maybe she doesn't have the germs, I don't know.
Did I make the right call?

 

I would have sent the healthy one. There are lots of times in this house where one gets sick and not the other. To keep one out because he/she "might" get sick is not worth it to me. But, I can totally understand your reasoning.

 

I would send the healthy child. Recently Karina had a nasty flu bug that lasted for 8 days (vomiting, nasty diapers, lost 2 pounds). Annelise never got it. I still sent her to day care on the days Karina had to stay home.

 

Your reasoning makes sense. But the last 2 times my little girls got sick (throwing up sick) my oldest never got it. You just never know who will get sick and when, or even if they will pass it along!

 

I think that is really up to you. I think it is great that you are considering the health of other children in preschool as well. Personally, for me it depends on what kind of illness the child has, and if it would be feasible for me to load them all in the car to take the well child/ren to preschool. I am a single, working mom so if I have someone who is able to watch the sick child, then the others would definitely go, so I wouldnt have to miss work. If I was to have to stay home due to having sick children, then more than likely I would keep them all home.

It is possible that Ainsley might not get what everyone else has. 3 of my four children just had a stomach virus 2 weeks ago, and my one 4yr old DD didnt get it. (i thought that was a miracle) I would say if she seems upset that she isnt able to go, I would probably take her.

 

I think I would have sent the healthy one as well.

 

I've done it both ways. The first time Nolan got sick on a school day, Meghan was totally against going to school by herself. I chose not to fight the battle and kept her home, too. The next time, I had Nolan and Liam sick. She told me she didn't want to go alone. So Doug went in late and dropped her off at school so it would be easier for her not to be left there when the boys were coming with me. She never got sick either time. I really think it's up to you, and if I weren't feeling well (like you), I would probably have done the same thing you did.

 

Yeah that was part of it too. Getting out of the house is just too much trouble, I didn't feel like it. Blah, I do feel kind of bad that I didn't take her though. I don't think I've ever had just one get sick, hopefully she won't catch it, I thought it was just a given that she would get sick.

 

We went thru this in November when the girls started full day preschool/daycare 3 days a week. I had to stay home from work for a week at the end of November while Natalie was sick and I did send Brooke for just the preschool portion of the day while I kept Natalie home.

Kim

 

I always kept them both home, then really started to feel guilty about it. Last month Sarah was VERY sick with a high fever, and Alex was going on day 5 of showing no signs. I decided to send him (first time ever sending one and keeping the other home), and use the time he was at school to get Sarah into the pedi. Well, lo and behold, I'm pulling into the parking lot at the doctor's office and I get a call from the school - Alex is having a very rough day, and they are fairly certain he must be coming down with what Sarah has. :fool:

In my house, it always seems like if one gets it, we all eventually get it, in one form or another. I can definitely understand where you're coming from!!

 

I had that once. Sydney was sick, I took her to the pedi in the morning (with Dani) then took Dani to school (even though I had Sydney with me still). I could not keep Dani home since it was their holiday show, and she was so excited about it.

 

I never keep them both home if only one of them is sick. I figure if the other one does get it, then she'll have to stay home then (and I'll miss work), regardless of whether I keep her home now too. And it's not inevitable that she will -- we've had many illnesses that one got and the other didn't. Plus, it's so much easier for me to be home with just one of them.

But your calculations are probably all different since 1) you're used to being home with both of them and 2) you're not missing work when they're sick. And I can definitely see the point about not wanting to get everyone out the door, especially if Bea is so sick.

Still, I rarely make decisions based on the likelihood that someone is about to get sick -- I just treat them as healthy until proven otherwise. As far as keeping the germs away from the other kids, while that's a noble goal, that's probably where the germs came from.

 

The healthy one always goes here. In fact, on Friday Jonathan was home with Strep Throat, and Marcus never got it.

 

My kids aren't in preschool yet, but I would have done the same thing. I know the other would be getting sick shortly and what a pain to load everyone up and drop off. Then the sick one would still have to come into school for drop off and might be upset about not getting to stay. I think you made a good decision that will make your life easier in the long run.

 

When we had one sick dh asked me what I was going to do.. he figured they'd both stay home. Nope. I always send the healthy one. It does help that a school bus picks them up. There were a few fridays (I drive on Friday) that everyone was sick except for one of the twins and then it was just too much hassle to get that healthy twin to class. I would send one without the other, and have.

 

In your situation, I might have kept them both home, too. You weren't up to taking her, cleaning up a car full of vomit would not have made you feel any better, and it's not like missing pre-school is that critical.

That being said, we always have sent the well one to school because: we didn't want to introduce the thought or set a precedent of staying home when you're well, we don't want one to have miss if it's not necessary (their time may come in a few days, anyway!) and for use it's not a given they'll both get it, anyway. Rosalie has had strep twice and Ella never has. Ella has had several ear infections and Rosalie only one.

 

i've been in that situation a couple of times and have WANTED to send the one who wasn't sick, but the non-sick child refuses to go. this is especially an issue with cameron - he won't do anything without alisha (so annoying). i haven't pushed it yet - after all, it's just pre-school and honestly the sick one is better entertained with the non-sick one home. plus, for us EVERY time one gets sick enough to have to stay home (which is actually rare here) the other one has too.

 

This happened to us a month ago. N was sick---bad fever. I kept them both home for the whole week (t,w,th). The following week, S was sick with fever. Again I kept them both home so they ended up missing two weeks (they go three days a week). I did not want to send the 'healthy' one since I thought he could be carrying the virus and in this case I was right.