Wow, amazing article about bfing saving lives

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100405/ap_on_he_me/us_med_breast_feeding_savings

 

I read this earlier! Pretty neat... sad though that so few women make it to 6 months bfing...and this is about singletons!

 

Wow, great article! Thanks for sharing it.

And there are SO many people who refuse to believe that breastmilk is any better than formula. :headbang:

 

Great article! Thanks for sharing

 

Thanks for sharing that. One thing that was missing, and is almost always missing from bfing information, is that it doesn't have to be all or nothing. It maentions women working or having other obligations that prevent them from bfing, many (if not all) of those women could partial bfeed.

 

An article like that won't change a single person's behavior. It won't encourage someone who may have been dismissive of bf to try. Breastfeeding isn't hard for most people. Yes, for some. Do you know anyone who physcially was unable to breastfeed? I don't. I do know poeple who didn't breastfeed because they-

-took meds that they were concerned might be unsafe (even though Hale says otherwise)

-thought the baby was hungry (well, maybe he/she is, nurse him!)

-because they 4 day old liked the bottle better (why did the kid even know such a thing existed?)

-because dad/partner felt left out of feeding (can't he do other things????)

-because the night nanny said formula would be easier (WTF? why have a kid if you aren't going to care for it!)

Those are people who are physically unable to bf, just people who don't want to. I do feel bad for people who truly can't, I just haven't meet any yet.


(Sorry didn't mean to be so negative. Frustrated about hearing how "lucky" I am to breastfeed. It wasn't luck, I just did it.)

 

Username - :clapping: for your post! Right on.

The one thing I'd take issue with, though, is this:

Maybe I'm reading you wrong - are you implying that having a night nanny = not bothering to take care of your kid? I think a night nanny can be a total luxury (even decadent or frivolous), and that if someone is of the mentality of outsourcing parenting it would be one way to do it. But for some people it's a true necessity. Some people can handle sleep deprivation OK, but others are severely impaired by it. That could be a serious problem if mom is, say, a surgeon. Also, for some health conditions (like depression and bipolar disorder), sleep deprivation is like throwing gasoline on a fire. In those cases, mom's ability to enjoy her baby and be an involved, attuned parent will probably be decimated by NOT outsourcing the night work (whether to a night nanny, relative, or partner).

But of course, even if you do need to lean on others for help at night, that's no reason not to BF! You can BF all day and give EBM or formula at night.

 

i also get very frustrated when people say they couldn't BF when what they really mean is that they chose not to BF. and if you choose not to BF, hey, that's your choice - i'm not in your shoes, or living your life, nor am i in any position to judge. but whatever your reasons are it is most definitely not the same thing as being unable to BF.

i am also very frustrated when i hear stories of moms who struggle and struggle and struggle with BF because they were given bad advice early on - either from a nurse or a doctor or a friendly relative. it becomes so stressful & so much of a struggle for them & they don't know where to go for accurate & useful information that they end up giving formula.

the article itself wasn't surprising to me but i started reading some of the comments after and DH had to tell me to "walk away from the computer" because i was so frustrated. :blush:

 

Oh, and I was also thinking about meds and BFing - some women are pretty much forced to wean due to meds because they have ignorant doctors. Some doctors will not rx something to a nursing mom, and some pedis will not work with a nursing mom taking certain meds. For women whose choice of doctors is very limited (due to insurance or geography), this is a real problem. In theory you could go ahead and take stuff behind the doctors' backs, but IMO that's not such a hot idea - because if you suspected the baby was having a reaction to your meds, you'd have no one to turn to, and if your baby had some serious health issue, you wouldn't be able to tell the doctor/ER rxing meds for the baby to check for interactions with your own medication.

So yes, total :headbang: about ignorance and refusal to trust all the research. I am the drug czarina, and from all the research I've done I know that there's a good chance that most things actually are OK. But sometimes these things are beyond a mom's control. Stinks, but it's true.

 

I have no idea what I'm trying to say! :unsure: I'm so exhausted! :drown:
I guess what I am saying that if you outsource most of your child's hours to someone else you aren't really parenting. Perhaps this is part envy and resentment (I'd love a regular schedule that included 3 hour a week to myself. Heck, I'd love to poop alone on occasion! :laughing: ) and part frustration (Don't complain about how hard it is to be a parent when you have someone else caring for your kid/s 40+ hours a week so you can play tennis.).

Parenting is hard work and I don't think a mom of one kid necessarily has it "easier" than a mom of 8. I don't want to get into a battle of wohm vs sahm. I've been both; they are both hard, but differently.

So as I ramble on here, I guess my main idea is that breastfeeding isn't hard. Or is *shouldn't* be hard, yet we hear all the time that it is.

(once upon a time, 10 years ago, I had coherent thoughts! :headbang: )

 

I am not sure why there is problem with the article. Maybe I am misunderstanding or missing something, but in my perspective the article was not exactly about trying to convince more mothers to bf, per se. I think the article is talking about a recent study, which is talking about a public health issue and is getting information out about HOW important bf can be. I think it's especially important right now as we as a nation talk about the cost of healthcare. We all know bfing is important, but when articles like this come out it becomes harder for people to dismiss its importance.

This article, along with many others written about the recent study, has really gotten lots of people talking about breastfeeding. For the last few days the Kellymom's facebook site has been posting articles every day related to this study, and there is some really, really interesting dialog going on in the bfing community about it. Pretty interesting stuff. One thing there are discussing on the Kellymom site is how people who don't BF feel guilty when they read research like this. But as many bfing advocates are arguing, we need to get real about talking about what a public health issue this really is. And for women who struggle we need more resources, less ignorance, more donated milk sources, etc.

I am one of those people for whom breastfeeding came VERY HARD. Because I know how hard it can be I am very hesitant to be dismissive of women who say they have struggled with it. It may look from the outside like they have not, but until we are in their shoes it's really, really hard to say. I don't want relive my struggles in this post, but I have lamented about them on this forum a billion times, lol. Thankfully, due to lots and lots of hardwork and support (especially from this site!) I am still nursing and pumping for my 7 month old boys. I also give formula, because with all my problems partial breastfeeding was in fact what saved the BFing relationship. So, I hear you Meximeli. I think that's an important point.

I know from experience how hard things can be, and when you have been on that side of things it becomes much harder to say that women who give up BF just really didn't try. However, I do hear what you all saying about it *not* being hard for most people, and I think there is a lot of truth to that. But I will say I used to be very, very critical of women who said they found breasfeeding difficult....until it happened to me.


So I it's really, really important to acknowledge that bf challenges are REAL. And even a simple problem can end the bfing relationship if you don't have the resources to overcome it or the family to support you. I believe that if we only talk about how easy and natural it is then we don't equip women with tools to succeed. And I think one potential good thing about this study is that we start really talking about BF as a public health issue and not just a lifestyle choice. In turn, we as a nation can start putting more resources toward making it easier for women to get GOOD resources for support (rather than bad advice from the uneducated pedi, for example). If the medical community were to really take this information to heart maybe more medical folks would learn how to be supportive of bfing women, which would in turn help bf success increase. We all know how uneducated some pedis can be about the basic mechanics of BF. Studies like this could possibly encourage pedis to make BF a more core component of their practice.

So, I think these kind of studies are great because they make it harder for us as nation to ignore the importance of bfing, which in turn could possibly help us find ways to educate medical staff so that women are more likely to get off to a good breastfeeding star. Or all those MILs comments such as "that baby needs formula" become easier to dismiss because the new mother is equipped with the knowledge that babies can and should be exclusively BFed until 6 months, and women become less uncomfortable about NIP because the general public stops seeing it as "dirty" and starts seeing it as beautiful, healthy, and natural. Workplaces and businesses make sure women have a place to pump, etc.

Don't get me wrong. I am all for women educating themselves and researching and knowing their facts about bfing. But I think our nation has such a long, long way to go in terms of helping women succeed with bf, especially in the medical community. Maybe this study can help to change that.

 

Very well put!!! I think that if more of the breastfeeding community took this approach to educating new moms, more new moms would try harder before giving up. The BF'ing community needs to be sensitive to the fact that the experience and situation is different for every new mom and the support offered should be customized to that new mom's situation. The new mother should not be made to feel guilty and overwhelmed. I had an extremely rough delivery with my twins and was very close to giving up on bf'ing them and most of the lactation consultants that "checked in" on me each day, while I was in the hospital, basically were driving me to that decision. I was extremely ill because I caught C-Diff infection after my delivery (which was vaginal and emergency c-section) and I was so sick that I could not nurse or barely pump for 11 days. I was also on 2 very strong antibiotics that both my ped and ob said I should not bf while on them. The lactation consultants just kept pushing and pushing and would tell me to ignore my ped and ob and nurse and that if I couldn't nurse that I should pump 8-10 times a day. They told me this while I was hooked up to a cathrater, ng tube, and IV and a fever of 103. It was all I could do to hold my babies. I was extremely ill. Well, one day a new lactation consultant checked in on me. I had begun to dread their visits and I am sure she could read my expression when she entered. I told my story to her and she asked me if I could commit to pumping just a few times a day. I told her that I could try but that it was already day 8 and no milk had come in yet so I felt it was hopeless. She gave me information that showed it was possible. She checked in on me each day until I left (2 more days) and together we made a plan that I could live with when I got home. She told me to take it a few days at a time. When I was discharged, I was still very sick but I was taken off one of the strongest antibiotics so I was cleared to start nursing. The lactation consultant told me to nurse them for 10 minutes before each bottle feeding. This was something I could deal with... if she had told me 20 minutes, not sure if I could have handled it at that point because bottles took forever as well. I was still extremely sick and overwhelmed by the thought of being home without nurses to take care of me. Let alone how to care for 2 babies and my 3 year old. I committed to this regiment for 2 weeks and see what happened (having this goal helped me to not get frustrated on a daily basis when I saw no sign of milk). Long story short... eventually my milk came in (after about 2-3 weeks) and I was given the clear by our ped to try bf'ing exclusively. It has been going well ever since! I am so thankful for the wonderful lactation consultant that listened to my situation and offered such personalized advice. She could tell that I geniunely wanted to make this work and didn't judge me for my feelings of hopelessness and categorize me as "one of those moms that is making excuses".

I totally did not mean to go into that entire story but I just wanted to make sure that this point of view is heard. If my milk had not come in, I would be in that category of new moms that could not do it for medical reasons and it would have been real... not an excuse.

 

GandEmom & garden2009 - i think everything you ladies said is spot on! and i think you're both amazing women for overcoming the challenges you did to keep BFing. my apologies if what i wrote came across as judgemental or uncompassionate. having had a tough time BFing initially as well, i agree that it's important to be compassionate & understanding of women who are facing struggles - and to offer support & information so that they can overcome the challenges they are facing. i think one of the key things that both of you mentioned in your stories was how important the right kind of support, at the right time, was! i found the same thing to be true in my case.

and i also agree that education - of women, of the medical community, of everyone in society on BFing, about how it works, why it's important, why it should be a priority is so important. the more everyone understands the more successful we will all be.

 

I totally agree on that as well! This thread inspired me to call my hospital's lactation consultant line today and talk with the woman that helped me. I told her how important her role was in my success and told her exactly why it worked for me and also passed along some feedback on what didn't work with the others' approach. She was very happy to get both kinds of feedback and said that they don't usually get calls back from people they help (or don't help). They need us to help them too!

 

If it isn't hard, then why have breastfeeding initiation rates climbed in the past few years, but the number of women still breastfeeding at 6 months hasn't? (I don't have any statistics handy, but I know I've read this.) That says to me, that women are managing to try, but are finding it difficult to continue, for whatever reason.

I personally found breastfeeding to be incredibly hard. I had poor latchers, incredible pain, breast pads full of blood, pumped 11 times per day (plus breastfed directly) and never made enough milk. I had to return from maternity leave when my twins were 5 weeks old, which certainly didn't help. I continued (though not exclusively) for almost 17 months, but only through sheer dogged determination. Is it that working mothers "can't" exclusively breastfeed? Does a woman have to stay home to be a "success" at breastfeeding? These are not snide questions, I'm honestly asking.

I have a friend here at work who is starting to wean her 4-month-old because she can't get enough time to pump here at work to keep up with his demand. This makes me very sad.

Until this country gives adequate maternity leave and support for nursing mothers (private pumping rooms and time to pump), I don't think breastfeeding continuation rates will ever climb. It's not reasonable to expect *every* woman to stay at home for the first 6 months-1 year with her infant. Many women (by choice or necessity) go back to work within that time frame; that's our reality and I don't see it changing any time soon.

I'm sure there are other reasons why women don't breastfeed, but I see working as a major factor.

But then again, I am one of the women who "outsources" the care of her children, so perhaps I don't have a good perspective on this.

 

[quote name='Nate and Jack's Mom' date='09 April 2010 - 11:36 AM' timestamp='1270827371' post='1615516']
If it isn't hard, then why have breastfeeding initiation rates climbed in the past few years, but the number of women still breastfeeding at 6 months hasn't? (I don't have any statistics handy, but I know I've read this.) That says to me, that women are managing to try, but are finding it difficult to continue, for whatever reason.
[/quote]

I think bad advice, misinformation, and ignorance are responsible for a lot of the difficulty women face. Moms get told to top off with bottles right after nursing (=supply killer), expect BF babies to go 4 hrs between feedings from birth and then think it's not working because they "just can't" BF, don't know about supply and demand, don't know what a good latch is like and how to get it, and are constantly made to doubt themselves (the baby is fussy? something's wrong with your milk! the baby isn't in the 95th percentile? something's wrong with your milk!). Some women also wean early because they've been told (sometimes by their pedis!) that nursing has no benefits after X months and is only a drain on the mother.

Of course, some moms (like you!) do everything right and still face genuine difficulties, which is totally not fair. (WTG for sticking it out, btw!) I think these cases are a minority, though. Formula hasn't existed forever, and if these kind of problems were the norm and not the exception, the human race would be extinct.

 

Wow, that's so awesome! You are so right about them needing that feedback. You have inspired me to call and thank the LCs at the hospital where I delivered. We had latch problems from the get go, and I was calling the LCs into my room at least four times a day to help. They were always patient, kind, and supportive. When my milk still had not come in by day three, they talked to me about pumping, praised the tiny bits of colostrum I produced, and really cheered me on. If I had been at a hospital with no LCs on hand, I would for sure have given up early on because of all the problems. They need to know that. They were real life savers.

And your story is so inspiring! I had no idea milk could come in so late, and it's so good to know that. I think these stories are so important because when women struggle with BFing and then hear these kind of stories I think they are more likely to not give up. But if all they hear is that it is easy and natural then they may start to think there is something wrong with *them* and figure they are just not cut out for it. I know I felt that way sometimes. I would see other women talking about how natural and easy it was and I would think there must be something wrong with me. It was so hard emotionally, you know?

I agree with a lot you say, Nate and Jack's Mom. BTW, you are awesome for sticking it out! Wow.

I think a lot of women are not aware of ways they can work and still make BF work, and I agree that it's hard. I am a SAHM. If I had been trying to work and had encountered all the BFing difficulties I experienced, there is NO WAY would still be BFing. I feel very thankful I was able to be home and continually work on BFing. And I SOOOOO agree we need better maternity leave. Then new health care bill mandates that employers have to provide a place for moms to pump and reasonable time to do it. I hope it really helps working moms. I think some people have no trouble with going back to work and still nursing, but for moms who are struggling already it just adds ones more difficulty to the list.
If we as a nation were to see bfing as a public health issue I think more employers would help make it more possible for moms to pump....and more more moms would really force the issue with their employers. I think we need both of those things happening.

A few other random thoughts I have about what would help BFing rates go up and continue after 6 months---

* more acceptance of nursing in public. I think nursing is still largely hidden, and I think this keeps many moms thinking they have to stay at home most of the time if they want to BF. That's why I think talking about BFing as a public health issue is SOOOOOO important. If more people really, truly thought breast milk was as important for babies health as we nursing moms know it is then there would be much less pressure to wean early, to hide nursing, etc. I'm not talking about everyone walking around with their boobs out, lol, I'm just saying I think it should be something we see so o ften that no one even gives it a second thought, kwim? Guess that's kind of a tangent, but I think it's pretty important...at least where I live. No wanting to NIP and/or have to stay home all the time is what keeps many women from choosing not to nurse.

 

I didn't think I could continue on at work and be successful at breastfeeding. I made very large sacrifices to do this, including my job. While pregnant, I could barely stop working to pee and eat enough, so I knew I wouldn't be good at getting out of a meeting early or stopping my work to pump when I should. So I'm laid off now; as is my DH. On the one hand, it is hard to not have a place to go with adults (other than DH), but on the other hand, I rarely have the burnout that most new SAHMs have because my DH is fully capable (other than BF) to care for them.

 

I agree with this, and I personally think the way we change this is to get the nation to realize BF is a public health issue and is something all doctors, nurses, regular folks, etc need to know more about. Especially pedis. We set women up for success at every turn.

I would also like to add this, and I am not trying to argue, but I notice that women who have not had that many problems with BF tend to think that it comes easy for most women and believe they give up too easily. Women who have experienced problems with BF and still stuck it out are much more willing to say that nursing can be very hard and advocate for more and more assistance for BF help for women and more willing to believe that when women say that had problems they really mean they had problems.

I think it is true that BFing is not hard for many people....but I do think that there are so many factors that play into what makes BF successful, and I really, really do think that many women do not give up as easily as sometimes the BFing community makes them out to. I am of the opinion that if we talk about how nursing can be either really easy or really hard we are being honest about BFing....and this, in the long run, will actually encourage moms and increase nursing rates rather than scare people off.

 

Bolding mine

I'm sorry that it was hard for you. But I am guessing that you and your babies are not the reason it was hard, but that society's value of bf is what made it hard.

I don't know why you had poor latchers. I'm guessing either they were premature, which does make it hard, or you were given bad advice, no advice or no one noticed the wonky latch early on. IF breastfeeding were more normalized and not hidden away, almost any experienced nurser could have said "What's going on with his latch? Looks funny to me." BUT because it isn't normalized that doesn't happen. So if that were the case, it isn't the actual breastfeeding that is hard. It is way we view breastfeeding that causes it to be hard. (Clear as mud, no?)

I don't think so many babies, especially multiples, need to come early. Twins need 40-42 weeks just like a singleton does and inducing labor or scheduling a c-section at 38 weeks just because they are twins sets a mom/child pair up for bf struggles. Again, it isn't the bf that is hard, but the way we now view preg and birth as something to be managed and controlled.

Then at 5 weeks you had to go back to work. Of course it will be hard. Babies are meant to be with their moms. I don't know if you had to go back to work or choose to go back to work, but either way that will interfere with bf. So again, the actual bf isn't hard, but making it work in a society that doesn't value it is hard. Making it work when you aren't even with your baby/ies is even harder.

It may be the "reality" of which you spoke but I'm not one to suggest we just accept our "realities" but that we work to change them. For our own benefit and our children's. I made a decision with my first child that I was going back to work. I would have preferred to stay home full time, but that wasn't an option that I could live with. So at 11 months I went back to work and he came with me. I was able to nurse him down for naps, share lunch with him, etc. I was willing to make waves and push boundaries because it was better for us and possibly, making it better for someone else down the line.

Do you outsource your childcare while you work? And then for another 10 or 30 or 40 hours so you can "live?" If you have someone else caring for your kids all but 8 of their waking hours over the course of a week, (say 4 hours on sat and 4 on sunday) then I probably wouldn't take your perspective seriously. If your kids are cared for while you work, that is a whole different story.

So, I'm going to stick with my original suggestion that bf *shouldn't* be hard, but that as a society we make it more difficult.

 

I agree with those who said breastfeeding is or can be hard and I also agree with Valerie about workplaces needing to be more supportive of BF mothers before rates can climb. I have a lot of friends who start out nursing but just can't keep their supply up after going back to work and I feel so bad for them.
I have to say that I know nobody was trying to be judgmental when they said BF is not hard, but it did come across sounding that way and coming from somebody who had a LC with that attitude I can tell you that it does not help encourage a mom who is struggling with BF to continue. I was a young 19 year old when I had my first DD and I was bound and determined to BF her so she could have what was best for her. Unfortunately she had a very difficult time latching and rejected the breast and even though our hospital was very pro BF the staff wasn't actually all that helpful in getting her latched so I was sent home as a anxious new mom with a baby who I could not feed. It was terrifying because I thought my poor baby would starve and it also caused me to feel very depressed because I felt like my baby hated me because she would have a total meltdown when I tried to latch her. I bought a pump and gave her EBM for 4.5 months. During that time I tried seeking help from a LC but she had a baby that took to nursing right away so she had the same attitude that BF is easy and basically made me feel like the problem was me and that I wasn't trying hard enough, which made me feel even more depressed. I wanted so badly to BF my DD and I tried everything I could but she refused, heck it was torture to even get her to take a bottle until she started solids, looking back I think she had reflux. With the twins they were preemies that couldn't stay latched long enough to get the nutrition they needed and since I also had a toddler that needed my attention I just pumped and fed them only EBM for 8.5 months. Thankfully Blake took to nursing right away and we haven't had any latch issues which made me feel a lot more confident in my ability to BF, but I still wouldn't say it was easy. We have dealt with my oversupply/overactive letdown issue causing him problems and although it seems to have gotten a lot better in the beginning it made it more difficult and kind of scary with his spitting up. If I had been a first time mom I don't know that I would have felt comfortable in continuing especially if I didn't have my families support. I also think that a lot of first time moms are very worried about their babies getting enough to eat and it can be so difficult at first with BF because it takes a while for the milk to come in and they may not be aware that the baby is actually okay to be getting the small amount of colostrum until the milk comes in. I know that a lot of hospitals even the BF friendly ones give new moms those diaper bags from the formula companies that have samples in there and it is all too easy for a lot of moms to think they'll just give their baby those until their milk comes in and then they've created latch issues. So while I agree that in the long run BF is easier at first it absolutely is not!

 

i think there are a lot of good points coming up in this discussion! i think this is an incredibly important issue that, without a doubt, should be talked about more. i also think this is a complex issue with a lot of underlying causes that are all to "blame" for the lack of continued BFing in our society.

another thought to throw into the mix is that our generation is one that is BFing in a vaccum, so to speak. for most of us, our mothers/MILs and/or grandmothers did not BF & so have no communal/common wisdom to pass down to us. if anything, their lack of understanding about BFing is one more hurdle for us to overcome as BFing mothers. we are having to reclaim this knowledge of BFing that, until two generations ago, was simply known by most women because they grew up around it. we aren't a society that allows women to learn from each other, our sense of community is wonky (although, in a way, we're creating new communities in on-line forums like this. i think this is good, but it's not the same as having a hand's on, IRL friend or group of friends who knows what you're going through), and our generations are usually spread out across the country (which, granted, can be a good thing ). but i think overall it's creating a situation for new mothers that is extremely difficult in a lot of ways.

 

That is a very offensive comment. So you have the mentality to be a SAHM. Some people have the mentality that they can have babies AND work. You are not in charge of deciding what good parenting is for the entire world. Day care has nothing to do with 'outsourcing your childcare'. That has to be one of the most ignorant, inconsiderate things I've read.

 

I live in a country where the medical establishment are VERY big promoters of breastfeeding---but maternity leave is 6 weeks post partum at most. (I personally work in a job where I have the option to take additial leave, but paid maternity leave is by law, 6 weeks before your due date and six weeks after the birth (whether or not that was on the due date). I don't have any stats, but most of the working mothers I know do not continue to breastfeed after returning to work. Many I know have intended to and tired, but failed. So even though the docs and the nurses all push bfeeding, it's not happening for working mothers. Reasonable maternity leave is a vital part of the equation. I was still havings issues with bfing this baby at 6 weeks. (I'm now pain free thankfully). If I had had to go back to work, I probably wouldn't have been able to keep it up. Canadians I hope you know how good you have it with your year long leave!!!! I would like to see the US and Mexico go to a minimum of three months post partum leave--minimum! Six months would be better, but only 5 weeks is insane.

 

Melissa, I couldn't be happier to read this. I'm so glad things are going better.

ITA! I "chose" to go back to work at 5 weeks instead of being fired (after having them very generously pay for me to "work from home" during my 11.5 weeks of hospital bedrest). It's just not enough, and the vast majority of women don't have the option to bring their child (and certainly not TWINS) to work with them. I wish I had a lot of hope that things were getting better in this country, but other than the pumping provision in the new health care bill, I just don't see it happening.

 

believe me, i'm grateful! :good: that being said, i still think even a year isn't long enough - i think we should all be following in European footsteps and be looking at options for up to 3 years for those who want it.

we, as a society, need to value the job of parenting more. period. and we need to start getting creative about how to do that.

 

I wish in addition to the child care tax credit, those who have a parent stay home with their child got a tax credit. Maybe there could be a breastfeeding tax credit, too?

 

I agree with a lot of what you are saying here, although I think the tone is problematic for a lot of folks. I do think the way we view BFing in this country is part of what makes it hard. A very big part of what makes it hard, and it is something that is very, very, very important to talk about. Before I experienced problems of my own with breastfeeding I used to think society was to blame for pretty much all breastfeeding problems.
But now having been on the other side of the fence so to speak I don't think that's all of it, and I think it overly simplifies the issue to talk about it in such black and white ways.

I agree with the basic idea that we need to work to change our realities. But not everyone agrees with what our realties should be. I think it is very great that you were able to take him to work with you and way to go for pushing for that. We need more women who do these kind of things. But not everyone is going to want to do that, and I feel that women need support for breastfeeding no matter if they choose and/or able to be a SAHM or a full-time working outside the home Mom.

I agree totally that we need to normalize bfing.

 

You know it's 2010 many of us are the primary bread winners for our families; some of us have jobs where we cannot just leave and come back and find a new job. Plus, some of us love our jobs. The whole tone of this post is awful, and I happen to agree that society makes it tougg, but rather than focusing on and individual and her behaviors, let's focus on how our social structure influences our person decisions and experiences.



[quote name='Nate and Jack's Mom' date='09 April 2010 - 11:36 AM' timestamp='1270827371' post='1615516']
Is it that working mothers "can't" exclusively breastfeed? Does a woman have to stay home to be a "success" at breastfeeding? These are not snide questions, I'm honestly asking.

I have a friend here at work who is starting to wean her 4-month-old because she can't get enough time to pump here at work to keep up with his demand. This makes me very sad.

Until this country gives adequate maternity leave and support for nursing mothers (private pumping rooms and time to pump), I don't think breastfeeding continuation rates will ever climb. It's not reasonable to expect *every* woman to stay at home for the first 6 months-1 year with her infant. Many women (by choice or necessity) go back to work within that time frame; that's our reality and I don't see it changing any time soon.

I'm sure there are other reasons why women don't breastfeed, but I see working as a major factor.

But then again, I am one of the women who "outsources" the care of her children, so perhaps I don't have a good perspective on this.
[/quote]
I agree with Melissa, a huge part of the problem is with the family leave laws in this country. Right now we get 12 weeks unpaid family and medical leave, some employers may offer more. For example, I get 6 weeks paid, and then the rest is unpaid. In countries like, Sweden each parent gets a year paid maternity and paternity leave. That certainly would help many paid labor force moms continue breastfeeding for longer.

Personally, I went back to work when my boys were 2.5 months old, and I was able to pump twice at work. Obviously, I can't pump while teaching my college students. It did have a negative impact on my breastfeeding situation because the pump just doesn't work well for me, compared to the babies, but there are people who have better luck with the pump. I also agree with Melissa's point, it's not all or nothing, and I was more than willing to continue even if the boys got one and then two bottles of formula. My ideal situation would have been to get a year's paid leave, but that wasn't happening.

And on the issue of outsourcing child care, people have been doing that for thousands of years. Sending your kid over to your mother, cousin, aunt, sister, or friend, is outsouring child care just like hiring a nanny or a day care.

 

Childcare for a working parent is one thing. Childcare for 90-110 hours a week is something very different. I have no issues with people working (or not). What would you call it if parents regularly go 4 or 8 days without seeing their young children? When there are two or more full time nannies who provide care? I don't call that childcare, I call that outsourcing the parenting. I don't care if it is 2010 or 1810.

It all goes back to saying that breastfeeding SHOULD NOT be hard. I think the mechanics of it, the supply and demand system works pretty easily. But that many other things get in the way to make it hard. Those things have been pointed out as societal (lack of respect +/or understanding of parenting and breastfeeding) and medical (inductions of births, increased c-section rates) issues.

There are other things that are supposed to be *easy* that aren't always but that doesn't make it the normalized view. (I can't think of any thing at the moment other than getting pregnant, which happens too easily some times and with great difficulty at other, and I don't think that is a can of emotional worms I want to open.) We don't focus on the fact that is sometimes hard when if mostly comes very easily. I think that is the general view of breastfeeding.

But I'm ignorant and inconsiderate. And my girls are done nursing so my frivolous screen time is up for now! :ibiggrin: