Why is she so angry?

My little Mattie gets so angry so easily. If she doesn't get exactly what she wants when she wants it, she has a complete meltdown and either hits herself or bangs her head. For example, last night she woke up at 12:30 so I went to get her. Well, I was carrying her toward the kitchen and she wanted to go to the playroom. I got her some milk and she cried and flayed her arms on the bed for 30 minutes of more.

Is this normal behavior for a 20 month old? I guess I am concerned that she is going to have anger management issues. She also will not go to any women, other than myself, MIL & SIL. She cries if dh tries to take her from me. She is exhausting at times. Does anyone have any ideas of how I can make her accept change and disappointment better? What about dh, etc...

TIA!!

 

Well I have no advice for you since DS still behaves that way when he doesn't get what he wants. He's always been the more emotional of the two. I just try to be consistent with time-outs in the hope that eventually he will get that he can't behave that way.

 

I think it's probably normal. They are old enough to know WHAT the want but not really able to tell you and get frustrted very easily. I have who would flip out in those situations and one that gets ticked off(throwing things, hitting me etc).

 

I have one that does it too. She'll throw herself on the floor and just wail and fling body parts, sometimes over something as little as us taking to long to give her her pacifier.... Right now we just ignore her until she's done. She's still to young for Time Out but we certainly don't want to encourage it either. Hopefully it's just a stage.

 

((hugs)) I think it's normal. Gabe does it, too. At least I HOPE it's normal, otherwise Gabe will be right there with Mattie in anger management classes!
Sorry, I'm not a lot of help. I hope it passes soon.

 

:hug99: Yep, normal! Hate to admit it, but I have one of those too. Talk about nonstop crabbing right now. And major throw yourself not even happy if he gets what he wants cause he's so caught up in the tantrum kinda man! Loving it, too :nea: No anger management classes on the horizon for you!

 

This is kind of how Trevor acts as well if he doesn't get his way. He wants things his way or all h*ll breaks loose. <_< I am hoping he will outgrow it.

I think it's pretty normal behavior though, she is still too young to really understand things, hopefully she'll grow out of it.

 

I'm another one who is hoping it's a normal thing! Angie is like that when she doesn't get what she wants. :blush:
As for only wanting you, MIL or SIL, I have no advice. :hug99:

 

I remember someone posted once that they had modified their diet (went to all organic) because one of their chilren was having "anger issues" I'm sorry that that's all I remember, but it caught my attention as I had never heard that food additives were associated with anger before....

I also think signing is supposed to help with that. Are your kids talking much yet? It might help if she is able to say what she wants.

 

OMG - you have an Emma too?! She showed her meltdown side when we were at the pedi at their 18 mo. visit and his response was "oh, I see she is already hitting the terrible 2's". :shok: Grrrrreat. He said it is, unfortunately, completely normal and to let her just have her meltdown. It is SO hard to watch and deal with though. I try so hard to ignore her and just let her go, but it's hard sometimes.

 

sorry sweetie - both of mine are very much like that...Abby cries and points at nothing and yells "THIS THIS THIS" and Ian flails his arms and screams at the top of his lungs!

 

Yup, you just described Rebekah! And Renay at this age! They do grow out of it...although now that Renay is 8 almost 9 she thinks she can try and get away with it again. I agree that consistency is the key with time outs. Once they start talking it helps although they still try it. GL!!!! You'll make it through!

 

We went through several months of Ainsley having a complete meltdown over the littlest things. It usually happened in the morning. Even if she had been playing happily in her crib for a while before I got her, somewhere between her getting out of the crib and the breakfast table, something would happen and it would be all over. She would throw things, scream, cry, etc. The reasons for her meltdowns were things like, I picked the wrong color socks, she wanted juice instead of milk, stuff like that. If I tried to give her what she did want, it was too late, she didn't want it anymore. I am so glad it's over! She hasn't done this in at least a couple months.

 

Brandy--Anthony is doing the same things now. The tantrums are quite dramatic too. It is very frustrating, but hopefully just a stage. As for wanting only mommy, mine are going through this now too. It is almost like separation anxiety all over again! Hang in there Brandy. :hug99: