Why are they so much more pleasant

What the flip?! For the past three days we've had nothing ut toy stealing, hitting, and crying. I made their breakfast while they played in their room and somehow ended up on the computer and for much longer than I had planned. After almost 30 minutes I realized that all I had heard was laughter and chit chat coming from their room. I brought in their breakfast and immediately, Caleb threw a fit because his toast had teeth marks in it (that HE put there mind you) and Braxton's didn't so he wanted his. I got him calm, left the room again to conduct a little experiment, fast forward another 30 minutes and nothing but giggles and cooperative play! Right now I hear them roaring at each other and cracking up laughing ! Are you freaking kidding me? Are they just tired of looking at my face or what? Tell me this is normal, please. How long do I leave them in there? The room is 100% baby proofed and huge (they took our master). This could actually be a good thing I suppose.

 

Totally normal! I "hide" from my kids sometimes, because they play so nicely when I'm not around to whine at. In fact, I think that's why they don't know anything (per your other post), because I leave them alone to play as often as they'll do it. :lol:

 

My girls do the the EXACT same thing!! It drives me bonkers. They will be perfectly fine doing their own thing and the minute they lay their eyes on me they go ballistic!

 

No clue as to why but I have learned not to take it personally. Mine are so much better when I am not around that it is scary!

 

Becca, again, you're killing me. I just talked to my MIL and asked her about this (as I have all this free time now ). She said that when I enter the room, it boils down to an immediate fight to see who's going to get my attention first. I think she may be right. I tried entering the room again and Caleb grabbed a toy and pretended to be frustrated with its workings. I grabbed him instead of the toy and he just laid his head on my lap. So of course Braxton comes flying across the room to put HIS head in my lap. So I'm thinking she may be right. I might consider spending some one-on-one time with each of them. We haven't done that since they were about 5 months old. Wow, I just realized how bad that sounds.

 

I am so glad to know its not just my girls! The second they see me they are crawling all over and and whining, but when I am gone they are so happy!

 

us too. becca you may be on to something LOL

larami, your MIL sounds like she may have a theory to publish....

 

Ugh. I'm with you all. Hailey's new thing is to run over to me when I come into the room and yell "Mine!" ... so if Jake tries to come over close to me, she yells it again at him, and tries to hit him. Greeeaaatt! Ugh. Really, when do I become "Mine" again?

 

QUOTE(caba @ Nov 6 2008, 11:52 AM) [snapback]1059188[/snapback]
Ugh. I'm with you all. Hailey's new thing is to run over to me when I come into the room and yell "Mine!" ... so if Jake tries to come over close to me, she yells it again at him, and tries to hit him. Greeeaaatt! Ugh. Really, when do I become "Mine" again?


:rotflmbo:

Mine do the same thing except they aren't saying "Mine" ... Yet.

I have also recently discovered that they are much better behaved for everyone else.

 

I was beginning to think my kids hate me b/c it's the same here!!! I was starting to get a complex b/c whenever they are with someone else (family/daycare) they are "great!" Of course they are! I was thinking I'm such a horrible mother b/c when I would come back from being out (grocery store or whatever) and they are with my MIL or SIL the minute I walk in the house they will start whining and I'll hear from them, "They didn't do that once while you were gone!" Great.... I make my kids miserable is usually what I'm thinking. Glad to know it's not really me...

 

yep, same thing happens at our house and it drives me NUTS!

 

Wow I have never tried being out of their sight - our house is small and open plan. I must try hiding! But at least now I believe the childminder when she says how wonderful they are and how they play so nicely and never whine, fight, bite, throw tantrums etc. Before I just thought it was something she said to either make out how wonderful she is or, more likely, to flatter us with her praise of our children. Oops!

 

Hmmm.... How are you ever able to leave the room though?? When we try leaving the girls (22 months) by themselves, they just run to the gate and cry and scream the whole time we're in the other room, cuz they want to be with us. And the only place gated off in our house is the kitchen. If we try to leave them in the living room while we do chores in say the bedroom, they come find us REAL QUICK.

They ALWAYS have to be climbing on top of us or sitting on us. How do we get them to play by themselves for more than 10 minutes w/o coming to find us???

 

Oh I meant to add that they are the same way with daycare. Everyone that takes care of them says they NEVER cry, fuss, whine, etc... But as soon as we walk in to pick them up, fussing/whining commences and doesn't stop until they go to bed!

When someone else's puts them to sleep, never have the problems we have putting them to sleep.... or when family watches them for a couple hours, they're angels....

Hope we can figure something out!!

 

It's the same way around here. I sometimes feel like I don't engage with them nearly enough when we are home, but when I do they just melt down and throw fits. At least when I am in the next room, they will play nicely and explore their world on their own. I am SO GLAD I am not alone in this.

 

same here
i've literally hid behind a half wall we have separating the kitchen from the living room so they wouldn't see me and start being ridiculous
and my mom always tells me "they were fine until you got here, i swear"
it must be my sympathetic mom-face they get anytime they're upset... and the extra attention they get as a result
i've unknowingly trained them to do this
they're smarter than we all think :spiteful:

 

Oh I know exactly what you mean. For some reason my two are always whinier when I'm around. :umm: :angry: Sometimes DH says, "they were fine until you got home". It drives me crazy.

 

Same here, totally. Our house is an open floor plan so I have no where to hide. Any time my parents or my in-laws are here they basically tell me to leave the house because the kids are only fun when I am GONE!

 

OTOH I have read that it's a GOOD thing when your child has tantrums/meltdowns etc when he's with you - because this is his 'safe space' time where it's ok to be himself and express himself and he trusts that you're not going to leave him/stop loving him if he does - unlike daycare or more distant relatives.

Well at least that's what I tell myself anyway - to make myself feel a little better and less like a bad mother.

 

QUOTE(serranoboys @ Nov 6 2008, 06:14 AM) [snapback]1058855[/snapback]
What the flip?! For the past three days we've had nothing ut toy stealing, hitting, and crying. I made their breakfast while they played in their room and somehow ended up on the computer and for much longer than I had planned. After almost 30 minutes I realized that all I had heard was laughter and chit chat coming from their room. I brought in their breakfast and immediately, Caleb threw a fit because his toast had teeth marks in it (that HE put there mind you) and Braxton's didn't so he wanted his. I got him calm, left the room again to conduct a little experiment, fast forward another 30 minutes and nothing but giggles and cooperative play! Right now I hear them roaring at each other and cracking up laughing ! Are you freaking kidding me? Are they just tired of looking at my face or what? Tell me this is normal, please. How long do I leave them in there? The room is 100% baby proofed and huge (they took our master). This could actually be a good thing I suppose.


Because they don't like you! :lol:

JUST KIDDING. This topic comes up often, I've posted it myself and the answer I always get is "kids are most comfortable around their parents, so they act up. "

I've noticed they really want my attention since I'm not around much and it's hard.

I'm sure other posters said similar stuff, minus of course the biting humor of my first comment.

 

Agree with pps about jealousy and possessiveness. How about this: Andrew falls and bonks his head really hard. Before I even get a chance to go to him, Ivy reaches up to me and her face crumples and she whines, "Idee! Big hug!" She KNOWS I'm going to him and wants to stop me. I go to him and pick him up and cuddle him. Meanwhile, she clutches my leg and bawls and snots all over my pants. When I sit down on the floor to hug both at once, she screams, "No Andrew! No Andrew!" and hits him and tries to shove him out of my lap.

Someone remind me why I didn't clone myself...

So yes, anyway, I'm sure your boys are fighting over you! You are the sun, the moon, and the stars after all.

 

its funny - my kids spend 2 days a week with my parents and 3 days at daycare...the other day DD was in my mom's lap cuddled up and DS walked over and told her "No Abby you go to grandpa" :laughing: