When do they sleep all night?!?!?

My twins are almost 2, and I can probably count on one hand the amount of full nights sleep I have had! It seems like when one sleeps all night, the other one doesn't. They usually end up in bed with us because I have to get some sleep too! And when they do sleep all night, I end up waking up thinking something is wrong because they haven't woke up crying yet!

 

Wow, and I thought I had it bad when my girls didn't start sleeping through the night until last month. Happy to say that they now sleep through the night but that's not to throw it in your face but to share with you what finally worked for us. To be honest, I think I (and dh) were more of the problem than the solution.

One night, dh and I had both had it. We were so sick of getting up EVERY SINGLE NIGHT and attending to them (well, mostly me ). It wasn't healthy for them and it wasn't too healthy for us either so one night, when I heard my dd making noise on the monitor, I decided to just stay in bed and see what happens. She sort of cried but not a REAL cry like she was in pain or anything. It was an attention cry that basically said, "ooohhh kaaaaay....hello??? I'm crying. Come in and give me some attention like you ALWAYS do." I knew that she wasn't sick and it wasn't a full out cry like she does when she is hurt. So I waited a couple of minutes just laying there waiting and listening to see what would happen. I guess she realized that I wasn't going to go in and she just kind of started talking to herself for a few minutes and then fell back to sleep. If I had gone in there and picked her up and rocked her like I always did then I really think I would still be in that pattern to this day. For a couple of weeks, she would just wake up, fuss a little, talk and play to herself in the crib and then back to sleep. Now she actually pretty much sleeps through the whole night. Occassionally she will wake up to find her paci but then fall right back to sleep.

I would guess that sometimes they are usually waking up out of habit and probably waiting for you to bring them into bed with them?? That might want to be a habit that you start to break. Once they are sleeping through the night consistently, you will most likely start to sleep through as well. I know I finally am and let me tell you...IT FEELS DARN GOOD!!! GL and I hope you get some other great ideas from these ladies.

 

I agree, one night we did the same as the above post and after that, we've pretty much slept through the night. They just get used to it. We also did that in the morning when I wasnt about to be getting up at 5 with them. so i "ignored" them until 7 and then went in and since then, we go to bed at 7, wake up at 7 and we're fine...

Amanda

 

I do that sometimes. But sometimes their cries are like 'Help Me!!' And I am so afraid if I let the crying one cry, then the other one is going to wake up too! My DH is a fireman, and works 24 hr shifts, so it is hard to handle 2 crying kids at night by myself. You are probably right that it is all habit. I'll just have to try that when DH is at home for several nights in a row. Thanks for your advice! I am so glad I found this sight! It is nice to be able to just vent. It is also nice to hear other twin stories! Sometimes it makes me feel like mine aren't so bad!!

 

We were in a bad habit pattern too for months. I would RUN at the first sound of a cry, afraid that one would wake the other. After not being able to take it any longer, we just listened and it was an all out SCREAM for 5 mintutes and THAT WAS IT! You'd be so surprised what the other one can sleep through. I kicked myself for not trying this earlier. We had a horrible thunder storm this week and it woke E up. It brought back such bad memories of waking in the middle of the night. I do think it's just a pattern that needs to be broken (not saying it's easy), but everyone will be happier in the long run, especially you! Good luck!

 

Check out the book "On Becoming Babywise." My kids were sleeping though the night within two weeks after I got them on the recommended routine. They were 4 months old at the time.

 

We do not bring our children into bed with us. We never let our older DD sleep in our bed. We always took her back to bed.

We had to do some CIO about 6 months ago, it was hard, but worked.

 

I'm in the same boat. My twins turned one on July 4th and they are still waking 2-3 times a night. My dh works nights, so I have them by myself. This makes it hard because when one cries, I don't want her to wake the other. Which they do if I don't get to them fast enough.
We are on day 4 of no bottles. Because they were waking sometimes wanting a bottle. I'm hoping this will help, but so far it hasn't.
I am trying to get up enough guts to CIO. I did this with my first dd about 19 yrs ago. It was hard, but only took one night. However there was only one of her to deal with.
I guess it's just a matter of doing it and getting it over with. A full nights sleep would be heaven at this point.

 

Mine were sleeping through the night at 4 months, but I let them sleep where they slept best. I didn't push making them sleep in the cribs, because they wouldn't... so I did what I had to do.

Now they sleep in their own bed, its a king size bed that they share... and they MOST nights sleep through. Sometimes they wake for a sippy cup, and I get up and make them one.

 

Bea slept through on her own at 5 months. I never had to do CIO for night wakings with her, just for establishing bedtime.
Ainsley was a different story. I did CIO at 9-10 months for night wakings. It was really wearing on me. It took about a week for her to stop waking at night. We have periodic wakings, but I hardly ever have to go in at night. Most nights, they sleep through.

 

QUOTE(TripleL @ Aug 10 2007, 09:16 AM) [snapback]363939[/snapback]
My twins are almost 2, and I can probably count on one hand the amount of full nights sleep I have had! It seems like when one sleeps all night, the other one doesn't. They usually end up in bed with us because I have to get some sleep too! And when they do sleep all night, I end up waking up thinking something is wrong because they haven't woke up crying yet!




My twins are 17 months old (boy & girl). I have had 1 night that they both slept through the night. I work full time outside the home & I swear if I do not get some uninterrupted sleep soon I will loose my mind. I have a 12 year old & she was sleeping through the night well before 1 year of age. Am I doing something wrong with these twins?

 

It's MUCH harder to break them of their waking habits and wanting your attention AFTER they turn a YEAR OLD! I would nip the sleeping with them in the bud if you really don't want them in your bed. l

Don't go in immediately. They wake up and you have to lie there and say "darn it!" and then you get up and go potty yourself and get yourself a sm. drink of water and then stretch and listen. Doddle a little more before you go in. OR just lie in bed and wait about 10 min. or more before you go in. I wouldn't go in unless you suspect something is truly wrong, but that's just me! I know it's NOT for everyone so good luck :hug99:

 

QUOTE(~* dfaut *~ @ Aug 12 2007, 01:24 PM) [snapback]365527[/snapback]
It's MUCH harder to break them of their waking habits and wanting your attention AFTER they turn a YEAR OLD! I would nip the sleeping with them in the bud if you really don't want them in your bed. l

Ditto! I would not bring them in bed with you when they wake in the morning. They are so smart! My daughter has been sleeping through the night for the last two months becuase I started sending dh down (instead of me nursing her) during the night. It might be a few rough mornings, but in the end it should work out for the best.

 

Mine don't sleep through either. I've done CIO with my son and that'll make him sleep through for maybe a few weeks before he starts crying again for 30 minutes plus at night.. so I have to do CIO every month with him which wears on me, so in his whole life he's maybe slept through 2 months. My DD has never slept through.. She co-sleeps and wakes often to nurse. CIO NEVER worked for her (though I always gave up after a few nights of hours of crying)

I have all the sleep books.. it doesn't matter, those with babies that sleep well are jsut lucky (in that respect).. many babies do not. I'm hoping once I can reason with them it'll be better.


Stacy

 

Just wanted to give you a :hug99:. I am still wondering that myself as Kev wakes still once a night. He goes back to sleep but it always wakes me up and that just stinks and then I have to go back to sleep which is no small feat!

I wish I had some advice but I am not having luck there myself. :hug99:

 

I don't have much advice, but I will say to those of you whose kids aren't sleeping through and are wondering "What am I doing wrong" that the answer is probably NOTHING. All kids are different. Some kids will sleep through before others, some will do so more easily than others. My girls are identical, and obviously they have been raised under the same conditions, so I think they are a pretty good science experiment. ;-). Lilly sleeps through almost every night with the occasional waking, and Kate wakes almost every night once (and comes to bed with us) with the occasional sleeping-through. I wish they would both sleep through regularly, but at this point I'm just waiting Katie out.

 

I am sorry to hear you are all going through this. I feel so incredibly lucky. I don't know what I would do if I were in your shoes...probably pull all my hair out. My girls started sleeping through the night at 10 and 12 weeks respectively. We have only had a handful of nights since then where one would wake up due to being sick or something. Anyway, here's what we did (not sure if it will help, but here goes)...At two months, we started a night time routine with a bath and then bottle in our room with the lights dimmed and not talking. Then, off to their cribs in their rooms. (BTW, they were in their cribs in their rooms the first night home from the hospital). As the girls have gotten older, we have adapted the nighttime routine to accommodate. For example, the time has moved earlier, still do the bath everyday, and the time in our room is now for reading stories and playing for a few minutes. And now, when we take them to their room, we have to tell some more stories. But, we still keep a very solid schedule. If I hear one cry out at night in their sleep, we don't go to them. We only go in if it's obvious that something is wrong. There is no reason they would need to drink in the middle of the night. Also, even if they wake up prior to 7:30, we don't go in there. They know to entertain themselves until that time and we will come. So, I think what we have done is establish expectations. The girls know that once we put them in at night, we aren't coming back until 7:30 the next morning. We are very consistent and firm. On the weekends, they know they get to come to our bed and drink their milk and watch tv and that's their treat. Anyway, my suggestion is to just find a routine/standard that works for you and stick to it. It will be difficult in the beginning and you may need to do adapt it as time goes on, but your kids will learn that's the way it is and they will be fine with it. My Rachel has a lot more problem falling asleep then Danielle, but she knows this is the way it is and we give her her doll and blanket and she lays there until she can fall asleep. Good luck everyone.

 

I hate to say this, but our twins are almost 3 and my son rarely sleeps through the night. And trust me, we usually let him cry it out but it hasn't stopped the trend. We don't go right into the nursery at the first cry, but after 15 minutes or so we'll usually move our daughter out of the room into a porta-crib in our room so Puck can do his screaming routine. Sometimes he cries himself to sleep within a few minutes, other nights it's about an hour!

On the rare nights I've tried to go in & comfort him, it usually makes it worse. It prolongs it. In the early days, I tried to pick him up but he pushed me away. At the last well visit (almost a year ago!), the doctor suspected this is night terrors. Partly this is because Puck is over tired, which has gotten worse lately since he's fighting his naps.

The good news his twin sister was sleeping through the night at just a few months old, so I guess it could be worse!