What would you do?

My one daughter is in ballet and loves it. She was in the Nutcracker season 2011 and loved it. Well come this year she received another part but we learned they were not allowing anyone to be absent and she could not be in the Nutcracker bc we would be going on vacation and she would miss 3 rehearsals. I promised her we would not take a vacation next year around the time we normally do so she could be in it (she was super upset). Well a couple weeks ago my mom told me my dad wants to take the whole family on a big trip to Disney for Christmas. We said great and then I remember the Nutcracker. I talked to Alli and she got upset saying I promised etc. My family would be heading down Sat-Sat, my brothers family is only coming Sat - Christmas Eve (leaving on Monday). I was thinking of letting Allison audition and either me or Devon staying behind for the performances and coming down Sunday after her last performance.

I just hate how she was so sad

 

I'd have a hard time with that as well. My daughter just had her first Nutcracker experience this year. (The Nutcracker is always the weekend before Thanksgiving here) The excitement of performing, the practices with new dancers and making new friends, getting to watch the professional dancers, and even dancing with them, were all so incredibly exciting for her. She can't wait for next September to audition again.

So, I guess I have no advice to give, but lots of empathy. Some my feel it's a no brainer, family first. I just don't see it like that though. Then again, I don't want to be a parent that lets my kids dictate what we're doing, but The Nutcracker is a really big deal to dancers young and old . . . and a promise is a promise.

 

I wouldn't go either.

 

I would probably skip the vacation. But then again, I am one who plans around my kids activities as much as possible. For example, tonight we skipped my nephews play because the boys had basketball practice. They have a commitment to the team. At the same time, they will skip basketball practice next Friday night, because they are in the choir for Temple, and are committed to perform once a month--so that takes priority. If she is that into dance and wants to participate in the Nutcracker, I would make that a priority--I would also tell the family now, that , as a family you made that decision, and if they want to plan the family vacation at that time, you will not be able to go. As they get older, you will find that there will be more conflict during vacations--I know my niece who played basketball, was required to attend practices all the time during vacation, and was penalized if she skipped.

It is a difficult decision, but ultimately, I think you the promise should be kept.

 

I would suggest doing it New Year's Eve instead of Christmas. I know it would be easier for me to take off that week than Christmas week as we can only have one gone out of the office and seniority rules. That way everyone could still do their Christmas stuff at home then do the family get together new years

 

We would still go on the trip but just a couple days later. We have a large family of 16 so getting everyones schedules to work is near impossible. Plus my dad is paying for the plane tickets, park tickets, meals etc so I do not think it would be right to dictate the dates for the entire family. We still have a year but I am pretty sure I will let her audition, see what role she gets and let her make the final decision.

She is so passionate about her ballet (we even installed a ballet bar in her room).