What do your weekends look like?

It seems like all week I wait for the weekend, foolishly thinking that it's going to be different from the other 5 days of the week for me. Sure enough Saturday rolls around and DH takes care of the boys for about 2 hours in the morning so I can sleep in a little and then he is off to work or school until 3 or 4. As soon as he walks out the door I realize I have more laundry, yet another sink full of dishes and two babies to take care of all day by myself. On the days he doesn't have to work or go to school he always has errands to run that don't involve me and the boys. I am tired of this! Sunday he takes them to his parents so I can stay home for a little while and get stuff done and then I meet him over there. I feel like he has disappeard or I just don't know what he likes to do, when I asked him he says "I don't know, we can do whatever you want". I don't even know though. What can we do as a family to break things up a little? Last night we went out to dinner, which took an hour and a half and then we were back home. Or is this just how it's going to be? Sorry this has kind of turned into a vent. So anyway what does everyone do all weekend?

 

Sorry you're having such a rough time. I know a bit how you feel. Your weekends are just not your own anymore! My DH is content to putz around the house, watch TV and generally veg out on the weekends (although he DOES help a lot with the kids). If he runs an errand (usually to Home Depot or something, we usually all go just to get out of the house.).

I know that I have to be the one to suggest something or else he's happy being a homebody. He teases me because he says I get stir crazy being in the house (and I'm not even a SAHM, I work 4 days a week!). So, I'll say "we're going for a walk" or "we're going to the park" and he comes along. I've given up on him being the one to suggest anything, but he's always happy to go along. I also think it's important for the kids (ours are a bit older) to have a change or scenery, something he doesn't necessarily agree with.

You may want to just take charge of the situation and/or discuss with him how you're feeling. Maybe he's feeling couped up (like me) and needs to get out of the house but isn't really thinking about your needs. Talk to him before it festers!

 

You sound just like me this weekend. My husband is at school right now. He's supposed to be home at noon. We put the boys to bed early and in between feedings, we watch movies or talk. We both love college football so tonight we are going to the UC vs WVU game but we had to find a baby sitter. I don't know if that's an option for you but maybe you guys could get some time away with a sitter for a couple hours. OR go visit family members maybe grandparents who love to hold the babies so you and DH can get a small break while you're over there? I'm only 3 weeks into it so I'm sorry I don't have more advice. Goodluck!

 

QUOTE(Ericka B @ Nov 17 2007, 10:08 AM) [snapback]499987[/snapback]
It seems like all week I wait for the weekend, foolishly thinking that it's going to be different from the other 5 days of the week for me. Sure enough Saturday rolls around and DH takes care of the boys for about 2 hours in the morning so I can sleep in a little and then he is off to work or school until 3 or 4. As soon as he walks out the door I realize I have more laundry, yet another sink full of dishes and two babies to take care of all day by myself. On the days he doesn't have to work or go to school he always has errands to run that don't involve me and the boys. I am tired of this! Sunday he takes them to his parents so I can stay home for a little while and get stuff done and then I meet him over there. I feel like he has disappeard or I just don't know what he likes to do, when I asked him he says "I don't know, we can do whatever you want". I don't even know though. What can we do as a family to break things up a little? Last night we went out to dinner, which took an hour and a half and then we were back home. Or is this just how it's going to be? Sorry this has kind of turned into a vent. So anyway what does everyone do all weekend?



Maybe your inlaws could watch the boys so you could go on a date like once a month or something. I am still pregnant with my twins so I am sure my life is about to change even more but I do have one kid already and this was just something you had to get used to being a new parent. Life just was not the same after a baby enter the house. We try and play games once he goes to bed or we have a couple shows we like to watch together. When Jacob is napping we order carry out from a nice resturant and enjoy a meal together that way. When the weather is nice we try and do things like go to the zoo and things like that. Once your boys get a little older that stuff will be a lot of fun. My son is 3 and he is just such a blast to take to places because he gets so excited and it is so fun watching him and if you go with your husband you get to experience that joy together and it brings you closer. I would really try to have a date night though so you can get out together and reconnect. Hope this helps some.

 

I feel the samw way. My DH is super lazy on the weekends. I am definately a morning person now b/c by the afternoon, I am worn out. Well when i am all motivated to do housework on the weekends, he is still in bed. We have two older boys too so it is non-existant now that the twins are here that we get alone time. Last night the older two went to their grandparents and me and DH ended up going to sleep at like 8:30. Very boring I know. I would not even know what to do now if we did have time alone or anything. I know I am not really much help to you. I do know that it does get better once they get older. My older two boys are so fun to take out somewhere or to hang out with. That is what brings me joy now.

 

My DH usually golfs on Saturdays and we spend Sunday watching football, eating, taking the kids for walks, and basically vegging. I used to get irritated that he wanted to golf on Saturday but, to be honest, it is a little more irritating having him sit on the couch watching football BOTH Saturday and Sunday. Sure, he definitly totally helps with the kids and stuff but he is still kind of a blob on the couch and oftentimes I will catch him feeding my son's cheek instead of his mouth while watching a game on tv. We also like to take the kids out in the early evening to a restaurant nearby and have a drink while we order carry out. The babies are becoming more and more difficult now (at 5.5 mos.) to take out but even just going for a drink and carry out to the same restaurants we used to go to before the babies came helps us to feel like the couple we were before.
Finally, we try to save a new toy or new type of baby food to try when we are both home so that we can kind of share the excitement.
Basically, we bond over food and tv...not too different from before the babies came!

I am sorry you are so frustrated. It is sooo much harder during the winter months when the weather and the time changes!

Amy

 

Our weekends are pretty much the same as the weekdays. Occasionally on the weekend we will take the kids to mall and eat at the Food Court just to get out. I know, I know big spenders. But it works. The kids like the stimulation and I get to not have to clean up!!

 

My hubby works every other weekend and we usually have sports to go to for the older kids. Sometimes we load everyone up and go to the park. Most of the time we just hang out at home though! I hope you find a compromise that makes you all happy, and the best way to do that is to talk through it. :hug99: