My girls are currently going through a fiercely independent phase, and it is making going out incredibly hard and driving me crazy!!! When they are at home and throw their tantrums I just ignore them, but I am at a loss of what I should be doing when we are in public. I don't want my kid screaming and pitching a fit through the store, but sometimes I have no choice. Do I ignore them? Do I pack up and leave? Any discipline options to correct the behavior?
Kyrstyn, it depends. There have been times, I have kept on shopping with someone crying. There have also been times I have left the store and waited until they have calmed down and then gone back in. Mine really haven't thrown a full blown tantrum in a store, thank goodness. But if they are crying because they want something or are not getting their way, I just keep on going and ignore them. ardon: I figure most people have BTDT, so they understand.
Those are the worst! :gah: What I did when they did them was warn them if they didn't stop, we'd leave. And I did. This happened a few times before they took me seriously and now it never really happens. :unsure: I hope I didn't jinx myself. :lol: Do your girls like shopping? My two do and it was punishment for them to leave.
happened to us in ikea recently. we just put them back in the stroller and let them scream. not much to do otherwise. i have been reading happiest toddler on the block and it has some interesting advice but i have yet to use it. it is really just a phase and will pass. i believe that anyone who has had a toddler or two would feel nothing but compassion as they see you walk by with two screaming kiddos. i hear it starts to calm down after the 2nd bday.
Mine usually tantrumed because they didn't want to be in the stroller - they wanted to be free. I just stopped going out for awhile (which was not fun!), then eventually I ended up getting a better stroller - a used BOB Duallie. I don't know whether they just outgrew the phase or if the comfort level (and total confinement with 5-point harness + chest strap) in the new stroller helps them to chill out. Either way, they haven't really done it recently, thankfully! At the height of public tantruming, I would just let them scream since what they wanted was out of the stroller, at any cost, even if that meant back into the car seat. Jackson can throw an especially vicious tantrum! I felt embarrassed and just awful, but I really felt it was the best thing to do. Otherwise, they would have quickly learned that screaming = end of the trip and I didn't want them to be in control in this situation. :hug: Good luck - I hope this phase passes soon for you!
I have done all of the above. Its usually Miss M throwing the tantrum and I have ignored her, left, and when I had my sister with me I picked M up and walked outside with her and gave her a minute to calm down. It sucks!
This is a tough phase! My DS can throw tantrums with the best of them, depending on where we are, I either ignore him or we will step out for moment and let him calm down.
We haven't had just a total full blown tantrum in the store before but those ideas all sound good. Now, the other day we were at the mall playing in their indoor playground and as I was waiting on my friend to come back I thought I would go ahead and put the girls in the stroller. Hannah SCREAMED and started thrashing around. Then Hailey ran off back to the slide. There were people watching so I just put Hannah back on the floor and waiting for my friend so we could carry them out. :blush: I know, I gave in and probably shouldn't have.
If it's meltdown because they are tired, I try to have pitty on them and finish up and go home. If it's just screaming b/c they don't get their way, then I proceed with other measures. It all depends on the severity of the tatrum...if they're screaming like a banshee, I will usually try to tell them I will take away a favorite toy for the day to see if that works. I have told them either they stop or time-out..and then actually found a spot and put them in time-out and that has worked, b/c my girls absolutely hate time-out, and that has worked. Or if we're just about finished, I'll go ahead and finish up, ignore it, and go home. So, it really just depends on how close to be finished we are and how bad they are screaming. It's really embarrassing when people are looking at you when they are doing it, but I have looked at them and said, "You want to take one home" and then they stop staring <_<
QUOTE(twinboys07 @ Jun 26 2009, 11:22 PM) [snapback]1370889[/snapback] Mine usually tantrumed because they didn't want to be in the stroller - they wanted to be free. I just stopped going out for awhile (which was not fun!), then eventually I ended up getting a better stroller - a used BOB Duallie. I don't know whether they just outgrew the phase or if the comfort level (and total confinement with 5-point harness + chest strap) in the new stroller helps them to chill out. Either way, they haven't really done it recently, thankfully! At the height of public tantruming, I would just let them scream since what they wanted was out of the stroller, at any cost, even if that meant back into the car seat. Jackson can throw an especially vicious tantrum! I felt embarrassed and just awful, but I really felt it was the best thing to do. Otherwise, they would have quickly learned that screaming = end of the trip and I didn't want them to be in control in this situation. :hug: Good luck - I hope this phase passes soon for you! I have a BOB duallie too!!! Yay! Yeah, mine LOVE it! They will only stop crying if they are in it.
It looks like I may be the only way to say this but I leave the store. I can't shop under all that stress and I don't think other people shopping should have to listen to my kids screaming. I try to time my shopping in the morning right after breakfast and it has worked well so far.
QUOTE(Utopia122 @ Jun 27 2009, 07:14 AM) [snapback]1371159[/snapback] It's really embarrassing when people are looking at you when they are doing it, but I have looked at them and said, "You want to take one home" and then they stop staring <_< :rotflmbo: I will have to remember that one!!
I hate to be the creator of a scene, but I never give in. I can't imagine where all their stubbornness comes from. :unknw: If they are really throwing a fit we leave (either going outside until they calm down, or just calling it a day and going home). Otherwise I just keep going and ignore them. Lucky for me my two have my short term memory, too and have forgotten all about whatever it was in a minute or two so it isn't too bad.
I would leave if it were a major meltdown. Little fussing, I try to redirect them to playing with something other than what they are fussing about.
QUOTE(summerfun @ Jun 26 2009, 11:49 PM) [snapback]1370841[/snapback] Kyrstyn, it depends. There have been times, I have kept on shopping with someone crying. There have also been times I have left the store and waited until they have calmed down and then gone back in. Mine really haven't thrown a full blown tantrum in a store, thank goodness. But if they are crying because they want something or are not getting their way, I just keep on going and ignore them. ardon: I figure most people have BTDT, so they understand. Ditto!
