What do you call their bits and bobs?

It always makes me laugh what parents call their children's privates. My sister and her daughter called hers a gooza (I have no idea where that came from!). My niece is all grown up and they still use that word! My friend and her daughter call it a fluffity! So Lara has a bum or a bum bum for the whole thing. We have not really decided on what to call the boys' bits and bobs. We say willy and pee pee at the moment. Before we had even used the word Lara said one day 'I have a willy'. Do not know where sh got it from! We much prefer cute names to the real thing! What about you?

 

Hailey has a "hoo-haa". Jake has a "peeps" and we can their butt, well, a butt.

I was hysterical this morning when Hailey was reading a Disney book and said "Daisy Duck has a hoo-haa, Donald has a peeps." GREEEEAAAAT!

 

QUOTE(caba @ Apr 11 2009, 08:25 AM) [snapback]1268485[/snapback]
Hailey has a "hoo-haa". Jake has a "peeps" and we can their butt, well, a butt.

I was hysterical this morning when Hailey was reading a Disney book and said "Daisy Duck has a hoo-haa, Donald has a peeps." GREEEEAAAAT!


Erica :rotflmbo:
We call Sophia's privates a "hoo-haa" too and Luke's privates "Little Luke". Butts are just butts.

 

I call their vagina a vagina, boring I know, and their butts are booties. They both say booty too.

Erica, thats hilarious!

 

There vagina's are who-who's (my sister started it) and my nephew (who is there age) has kibbles and bits. Greta calls my boobs "little boobs".... I said that to her once or twice about hers and now she sits on my lap and says "mama...little boobs"...while rubbing them. She loves them. They are in fact little so I can't very well correct her. however, I will tell her when she's old enough that she's the reason they're so little.

 

Real names.

Vulva and penis, scrotum, etc. Every study shows that kids who know correct anatomical names are less likely to be sexually abused. When little suzy tells the teacher that joey keeps trying to touch her "insert cutesy name here" she isn't going to be taken seriously or understood. And when big uncle joe does the same?

Also my daughters know about vaginas but since they have yet to see or feel theirs we tell them the names for what they can see or feel- vulva, clitoris, etc.

When I want them to sit I use bottom or behind mostly.

 

we also use the real names, although they don't talk yet so it's not such a big deal. i also use 'booty' out of habit because i teach elementary school and that's what we use at work.

btw, i can't imagine someone not taking a girl seriously just because she didn't use the word for her vagina if someone was touching it. most of my students never used the real words (and i taught mostly in spanish so other adults had a language barrier, in addition), and i certainly took the handfull who were abused over the years seriously. not to neglect the theory in any way, but it just seems sort of odd to me that many studies have had this conclusion.

 

As I teacher and knowing lots of them it wouldn't matter what a child called their vagina/penis - they would always be taken seriously.

 

butts are well...butts...Abby's parts are a "nudie" - she named it herself I think because she took off one day with no diaper on and I told her to get back here so I could cover her nudie up...we call Ian's a winky...

oh and I don't think it matters...if a little girl comes up to a big tough cop and says "he touched my nudie" I seriously don't think its going to matter if she means her vagina, her clitoris or her anus - SOMEONE'S going to take that child at her word...

 

Ever since I was pregnant and saw their "girl parts" on the ultrasound that's what we've called them - their "girl parts" :laughing:

 

We call their vaginas a "peepee" b/c that's what I grew up calling mine. Butts are just butts. Of course when they're older they will learn the proper terms, but I don't see why 1 year olds have to know what a vagina is! haha. I love how creative you all are with your terms!! It's cute.

 

My mom always laughs, but their penises are "buggys" short for "peter-bug" Its what my friends used with their kids so that what we call it. MY mom laughs because when I was little, my mom and grandma always call vagina a "pee-bugger" so whenever I say buggy my mom laughs and says, "No you have a bug, they have willys." But willys never caught on and they say buggy.

When we have a girl, vagina will be "coochie" again just the phrase that my friends used, so around their kids, since they are older, thats what I always said. Just to keep things simple. The 3 year old I used to babysit saw me changing the boys and said "That hims coochie?? It funny." So I just said no, bioys have buggys, bc thats what her mom told me to say...

Just kinda stuck.

Shannon

Oh yeah and butts are always "heiny" that one I got from my mom. She saw them in the hospital and said they had "heart-shaped heinies" lol grammas...

 

heh, Alice has "lady bits" and Royce has "man bits", and the correct terms as well, penis, vagina, clit, testicles. . .I do call their anus "butt-hole" though.

And they have butts, as in "Get your butt back over here".

 

We started by teaching Nadia the Marathi word for vagina (actually, I'm not even sure if it's for vagina or vulva or what) -- mostly because I didn't want her yelling out "vagina" in the middle of shopping at Target. But, she quickly abandoned that, and for awhile was saying "front butt" and "back butt."

Now we mostly just say girly parts or private parts. It hasn't even come up with my little ones yet, as they're barely talking, so I don't know if Kevan's bits will have some cutesy name!

I've heard the studies mentioned numerous times, but I just don't see how it could make a difference. We've certainly had the talk with Nadia about her body being private, and who is allowed to see and touch, and who isn't. If she were to tell any authority figure that someone was trying to touch her "private parts" -- pretty sure that would be taken seriously.

 

QUOTE(Username @ Apr 11 2009, 11:53 AM) [snapback]1268687[/snapback]
Every study shows that kids who know correct anatomical names are less likely to be sexually abused.


This makes zero sense. So you are telling me that someone might be about to abuse a child, but once they find out they actually call a penis a penis, they move onto the child that has a silly name for their private part?? I don't believe that for even one second.

 

QUOTE(caba @ Apr 11 2009, 05:55 PM) [snapback]1269208[/snapback]
This makes zero sense. So you are telling me that someone might be about to abuse a child, but once they find out they actually call a penis a penis, they move onto the child that has a silly name for their private part?? I don't believe that for even one second.



I really have to agree here. It's a big claim you are making that kids who call their parts the anatomically correct name are less likely to be sexually abused. I'm curious what studies. If there is truth to that, I'd take it pretty seriously and would love to read the study. Thanks for any info you can offer.

 

In sweden a boy has a "snopp" and a girl has a "snipa" even though I speak English with my son, I tend to use the Swedish words because I think they fit so well. Cheers

 

Dd calls hers a tutu. Ds calls his a wiener. They call their butt baby buns

 

QUOTE(AndiG @ Apr 11 2009, 07:20 AM) [snapback]1268479[/snapback]
It always makes me laugh what parents call their children's privates. My sister and her daughter called hers a gooza (I have no idea where that came from!). My niece is all grown up and they still use that word! My friend and her daughter call it a fluffity! So Lara has a bum or a bum bum for the whole thing. We have not really decided on what to call the boys' bits and bobs. We say willy and pee pee at the moment. Before we had even used the word Lara said one day 'I have a willy'. Do not know where sh got it from! We much prefer cute names to the real thing! What about you?



:laughing: gooza (guza) is the serbian term for butt! we use that here.
and i just say peepee (marina says "peh-peh" heehee)
we use serbian words for everything here, but i don't like the serbian words (there are 2) for vagina... they sound very dirty to me :bad:

 

Proper names - vulva, penis, etc.

 

Hoo-hoo and butt or tushie

 

QUOTE(ddancerd1 @ Apr 12 2009, 08:08 AM) [snapback]1269579[/snapback]
:laughing: gooza (guza) is the serbian term for butt! we use that here.
and i just say peepee (marina says "peh-peh" heehee)
we use serbian words for everything here, but i don't like the serbian words (there are 2) for vagina... they sound very dirty to me :bad:

That's so funny! My sister will get a kick out of that!

 

QUOTE(AndiG @ Apr 11 2009, 08:14 AM) [snapback]1268706[/snapback]
As I teacher and knowing lots of them it wouldn't matter what a child called their vagina/penis - they would always be taken seriously.

thanks for saying this. I would hope so.
Penis and vagina here.

 

Penis, booty, butt, and bottom.

 

I couldn't decide for the longest time, eventually settled on the boring - crotch and bottom.

But, if she's reading, Bellarissa has an hilarious story about using real anatomical terms. I'm still chuckling about it well over a year after I initially posted the same question.

In terms of correct anatomical names versus family names, several sites DO suggest that it is easier to discover abuse if the child is using the 'correct' terminology. I couldn't find the original research. And I have my suspicions that it really is so helpful or if people are just citing one another. After all whether my daughter said "someone touched me here/crotch/vagina/who who" etc, I would take it very very seriously. As, I am sure, would their teacher or other involved professional.

 

I have boys & they have winkies. When they say it, it sounds like "wee wee" though. We say butt, too. I don't know what I'd do if I had a girl. My extended family calls it a tutu. However, when my cousin had her daughter, she wanted to teach her the real words, but family influence turned it into a "tutu-gina" & that has STUCK. Not something I'd use for my daughter, but it works for them! I grew up with it as a pee-pee. I think as long as the kids know that those parts are private, the names don't officially matter. But, I never did a study, that's just my opinion!

 

I guess I'm in the middle ground-- I think it's important they know both- but that said-- we've gone with 'boy pee pee' and 'girl pee pee' and butt/bum. And I'd hope that anyone who heard my child who summoned the courage to tell someone that someone else touched their pee pee would be taken seriously--- BUT--- I'm sure the results of studies like that are more because kids who've been educated about their proper part names are more likely to have parents that will talk with them about who is allowed to touch what and inappropriate touches and all that-- and that if a kid has had these discussions on an on-going basis with their parents they are probably more likely to recognize when something has happened that needs to be told-- let's not shoot the messenger there (sorry, wasn't paying attention to who wrote it)-- she was just trying to explain why it was that she felt so strongly that she needed to teach her kids proper names. I think we all agree that it's important to listen to kids & take them seriously regardless of whether they have pee-pees, winkies, or penises.

it was a very humorous thread to read. I'm afraid we're a bit boring. of note-- my sisters and I had "tinkle spots" and my cousins (female) had "fluffies" and I was the only one not sexually abused by an uncle-- our parents did NOT talk to us about any of the appropriate/inappropriate touches and wouldn't listen even when someone spoke up-- unfortunately, sometimes abuse has a lot to do with the environment, what the kids have been educated about, and how evil the pursuer is.


sorry to end on such a downer.

 

I always refered to Sophie's whole area as her bottom and one day she started calling her vulva her neara (I have no idea where she got that?) I let her call it that, dh and I know what she is talking about. She calls boy parts a wee-wee.
As for her butt-we usually use bottom or booty.

 

So I just did a quick google search on how to prevent sexual abuse and the number one "rule" is to teach correct bodily names by 18 months.

Here are a couple random sites-
http://www.gvparent.com/Articles/2703bodyparts.html
http://www.drgreene.com/21_792.html
http://www.dss.virginia.gov/files/division...exual_abuse.pdf
http://www.emqff.org/press/docs/csatp_english.pdf
http://www.sace.ab.ca/brochures/Child_Sexu...Information.pdf

If I have 25 kids in my class and Suzy tells me that Joey keeps trying to touch her "box" I might, as a harried teacher (let's be realistic) tell Suzy to keep her box under her desk. A child is abused an average of 7-17 times before telling anyone. If a kid has the language to comfortably talk to an adult about an uncomfortable topic it will be easier and he/she is more likely to talk. My understanding is that it is also a turn off for the adult abuser if a kid uses correct terminology.

Honestly, I'd love to take these answers and break it down geographically and by educational level. Might be interesting. :hush:

 

QUOTE(Username @ Apr 13 2009, 03:26 PM) [snapback]1271140[/snapback]
So I just did a quick google search on how to prevent sexual abuse and the number one "rule" is to teach correct bodily names by 18 months.

Here are a couple random sites-
http://www.gvparent.com/Articles/2703bodyparts.html
http://www.drgreene.com/21_792.html
http://www.dss.virginia.gov/files/division...exual_abuse.pdf
http://www.emqff.org/press/docs/csatp_english.pdf
http://www.sace.ab.ca/brochures/Child_Sexu...Information.pdf

If I have 25 kids in my class and Suzy tells me that Joey keeps trying to touch her "box" I might, as a harried teacher (let's be realistic) tell Suzy to keep her box under her desk. A child is abused an average of 7-17 times before telling anyone. If a kid has the language to comfortably talk to an adult about an uncomfortable topic it will be easier and he/she is more likely to talk. My understanding is that it is also a turn off for the adult abuser if a kid uses correct terminology.

Honestly, I'd love to take these answers and break it down geographically and by educational level. Might be interesting. :hush:


Thanks for the links. We have now taught our girls the proper names for their private parts just as we have taught them the proper names for all their other body parts. I understand the reluctance to teach children the actual names and when my oldest was 3 she didn't really have any names at all for her specific private parts - she referred to the whole area as her booty. She was abused, and told me by using the general term booty and then later pointing to the specific area hurt without her clothes on. I can tell you that booty is not a term that is helpful in speaking with the child advocacy center. I will always wonder if her interview with her caseworker would have went differently had she known the actual names of each of her private parts and I had discussed them with her in the same manner as naming her knee or her elbow - would she have felt comfortable verbalizing exactly what happened? I'll never know. But I think it was a mistake on my part and I deeply regret it.

It is interesting, because I know some of you that have responded you wouldn't want to hear your children say penis, scrotum, vagina, labia, clitoris have talked on other threads about it being important to you to have open, honest communication with your children, how you want them to be able to talk to you about anything, how you want them to be comfortable with their bodies and their sexuality (when they are older - of course!)- yet you are treating the genitals in a way that says to them you are embarrassed to discuss them. Aside from the sexual abuse issue - prevention, reporting, prosecuting... there is the whole issue of what message does it send to your children that the real name is not to be spoken aloud? I know you may not see the connection because I didn't used to either. But I think it's something to consider. Sure, it could lead to an embarrasing moment one day, but don't our kids find a way to embarrass us anyway FWIW, I've haven't had it happen yet.

I pulled this quote out of the first link:
"When a child doesn't have a name for something, they often can't "own it," and, therefore, protect it or tell someone about what has happened. If a child feels ashamed about part of their body, it becomes easier for the abuser and harder for the victim to come forward.

Mary E. Whittier, Executive Director of the Bivona Child Advocacy Center says clear definitions are crucial. "It's important to teach children the correct terms of their genitalia, just like we teach them the correct terms for other body parts. If a child is a victim of sexual abuse, it may become confusing for them to identify what has happened if they know their 'private parts' as something different. Additionally, when we call the vagina a 'cuchie,' the message we are sending is that we are too ashamed or embarrassed to say the word 'vagina.' Body parts should be spoken of without shame or hesitation when educating our children."

Parents can help their children develop a positive attitude about their bodies and can begin to give children control over their bodies by giving them a vocabulary as well as the positive attitude they will need to protect and enjoy themselves. If they can't name it or feel bad about it, then they can't protect it or nurture it."




BTW uername - the dss.virginia link wouldn't work for me

edited for spelling

 

Sheryl, thanks for the great post. I had no idea about the abuse -- how horrible. I am so sorry. Definitely gives me something to think about...


QUOTE(Username @ Apr 13 2009, 03:26 PM) [snapback]1271140[/snapback]
Honestly, I'd love to take these answers and break it down geographically and by educational level. Might be interesting. :hush:


I know what you're saying, and I've often thought the same thing about breastfeeding....but man, you so don't want to open that can of worms...!

 

Sheryl, thanks for sharing your personal experiences (so sad! ) and Username, thanks for the great links. They are great resources for us to have as parents. While we generally call our sons' body parts by their proper names, this is reinforcement for me to consistently do so in a more straightforward manner.

 

Thank you Sheryl and username. I'm so happy to have the info. It's so important. I'm going to make a better effort to use proper names. We will still use our cutsie names at times, but they'll def know the real names and we'll use that a lot. THANKS LADIES!

 

QUOTE(ThreeLittleSnowflakes @ Apr 13 2009, 04:34 PM) [snapback]1271267[/snapback]
Thanks for the links. We have now taught our girls the proper names for their private parts just as we have taught them the proper names for all their other body parts. I understand the reluctance to teach children the actual names and when my oldest was 3 she didn't really have any names at all for her specific private parts - she referred to the whole area as her booty. She was abused, and told me by using the general term booty and then later pointing to the specific area hurt without her clothes on. I can tell you that booty is not a term that is helpful in speaking with the child advocacy center. I will always wonder if her interview with her caseworker would have went differently had she known the actual names of each of her private parts and I had discussed them with her in the same manner as naming her knee or her elbow - would she have felt comfortable verbalizing exactly what happened? I'll never know. But I think it was a mistake on my part and I deeply regret it.

It is interesting, because I know some of you that have responded you wouldn't want to hear your children say penis, scrotum, vagina, labia, clitoris have talked on other threads about it being important to you to have open, honest communication with your children, how you want them to be able to talk to you about anything, how you want them to be comfortable with their bodies and their sexuality (when they are older - of course!)- yet you are treating the genitals in a way that says to them you are embarrassed to discuss them. Aside from the sexual abuse issue - prevention, reporting, prosecuting... there is the whole issue of what message does it send to your children that the real name is not to be spoken aloud? I know you may not see the connection because I didn't used to either. But I think it's something to consider. Sure, it could lead to an embarrasing moment one day, but don't our kids find a way to embarrass us anyway FWIW, I've haven't had it happen yet.

I pulled this quote out of the first link:
"When a child doesn't have a name for something, they often can't "own it," and, therefore, protect it or tell someone about what has happened. If a child feels ashamed about part of their body, it becomes easier for the abuser and harder for the victim to come forward.

Mary E. Whittier, Executive Director of the Bivona Child Advocacy Center says clear definitions are crucial. "It's important to teach children the correct terms of their genitalia, just like we teach them the correct terms for other body parts. If a child is a victim of sexual abuse, it may become confusing for them to identify what has happened if they know their 'private parts' as something different. Additionally, when we call the vagina a 'cuchie,' the message we are sending is that we are too ashamed or embarrassed to say the word 'vagina.' Body parts should be spoken of without shame or hesitation when educating our children."

Parents can help their children develop a positive attitude about their bodies and can begin to give children control over their bodies by giving them a vocabulary as well as the positive attitude they will need to protect and enjoy themselves. If they can't name it or feel bad about it, then they can't protect it or nurture it."
BTW uername - the dss.virginia link wouldn't work for me

edited for spelling


Thanks for this post. I am so sorry about what happened to your daughter - just horrible.

It has really made me see things differently and I will be teaching my children the correct names. Thanks for sharing your experience.