Well I have a few questions. My twins are two months old as of tomorrow. 1. DD is having trouble napping. She will not go in her bed, the pnp, bouncy, car seat, or swing. She only wants to be held. That and I better be sitting up. the few times I tried laying down wig her on my chest failed. I have tried all the carriers and slings. She will fall asleep, bit never really well, while I hold her. The second I put her down (drowsy but awake right) she wakes up and screams. I feel horrible, bit today I tried CIO. She screamed for 15 mins (I had to eat lunch) tuen I went get her. She was so exhausted tha she finally went to sleep and I was able to put her in the bed. I don't want to have to do this (let her cry for 10-15 min) at her age but that's the second time I had to do that. Without it she WON'T go down. Any advice? Do I let her cry? 2. About three weeks ago my nights looked like this. ---bath 8:30 --- bottles 8:45 --- bed by 9:15 they would make it till about 2:00 and then 6:00 to eat. This was great. Well suddenly DD started waking at 1:00 and 4:00 (during the say they eat every 4 hours). At first I woke DS to eat too but then one night my parents kept DS b/c DD was sick. He went from 8:45-5:00 at their house. I tried not waking home at home and he did that again. He is STTN!!! I still wake him mist nights to eat with her. Should I stop and just let him sleep? Do I just wake up at her 4:00 feed? I figure he will be going to 6:00 soon so i don't know. 3. What did you do about them disturbing each other? They sleep in seperate cribs but when one wakes up he\she will cause the other to wake. Sometimes it's ok, but a lot of times it's only been a short time since they went down. Oh both have acid reflux and are on Zantac.
I would not do CIO at 2 months old. I don't believe in CIO in the first place, but if you are going to do it, 2 months is way too young, at least from the things I have read. I know you are trying to do drowsy but awake - but have you tried rocking or holding her until she is completely asleep and then putting her down? You may just have to do that for while. I assume you have the bed propped up, etc. As far as the waking to feed, I was lucky that we never had to deal with that - our LO's always ate together and one night they just both didn't need to eat and haven't had to since. I would try letting him sleep for a few nights and see what happens - if he is consistently sleeping through, then let him be - hopefully she will be soon, too. As far as them waking each other, yes, they do, and it is something we just deal with and hope for the best. Sometimes that means a shortened nap for both of them, or one getting woken up by the other or whatever. We don't have the space for them to have two separate rooms, so we just put up with it. It's not TOO much of a problem for us, but occasionally it is a problem - we keep a rocking chair in the living room where if one wakes up and it seems to be disturbing the other, we can take them out. That's the best we can do with the limited space we have.
1. Talk to your doc--the reflux may not be sufficiently controlled. It's OK to let them cry for a few minutes if you have to do something like eat so you don't pass out. But in general, I would soothe them when they cry. But maybe you can do it sometimes without picking them up--like rub their backs? 2. Unless your doc tells you otherwise, let him sleep through the night! And enjoy it!!!!! 3. PNPs are great for being able to separate them for naps. You could also separate them at night by having one in your room in a PNP.
I wouldn't let them cry, either. They are waaay too young for CIO. Do you swaddle your babies? You didn't say. Swadling could help, also I agree with Eagle. I would hold them until they are out, in deep deep sleep and then put them to their bed/bouncy/swing - whatever. Eventually, when they are old enough to do CIO, you can start putting then down drowsie but awake. Do they wake up because they are hungry? Or is there something else that bothers them? Waking up at 1 and 4 sounds normal to me at two months. But maybe they don't get enough to eat during they day? Try to increase their milk intake especially before bedtime and see if that helps. I wouldn't let them cry, either. They are waaay too young for CIO. Do you swaddle your babies? You didn't say. Swadling could help, also I agree with Eagle. I would hold them until they are out, in deep deep sleep and then put them to their bed/bouncy/swing - whatever. Eventually, when they are old enough to do CIO, you can start putting then down drowsie but awake. Do they wake up because they are hungry? Or is there something else that bothers them? Waking up at 1 and 4 sounds normal to me at two months. But maybe they don't get enough to eat during they day? Try to increase their milk intake especially before bedtime and see if that helps.
The first few months are really tough! There is just no sugar coating it. It takes a while for these little beings to put on some pounds and also to learn how to sleep. I agree with the suggestions of the pp. Try different things, what doesn't work one day, may work the next. It's about "survival" and getting as much sleep as you can, whenever you can. I separated the boys for naps. Sam slept in his bassinet in his room since he wasn't as good of a napper as Luke was. So, i felt that i could move Luke somewhere else. So, he slept in a swing in my room. They didn't nap in their cribs until they were about 4 months old. We rocked them to sleep until they were about 5 months old. We had this method to put them down without waking them... it wasn't easy, and it took a bit for us to perfect it! It was torture when we had someone help take care of the boys and they didn't know how to do it Also, I think they wake at this age just because they don't necessarilly know how to sleep. And their bodies are so little, any little bit of gas or anything can give them discomfort - which will wake them. Good luck!!
Having a baby cry for 15 minutes is not the end of the world. It all depends on your parenting approach and what you believe will work for you and your babies. I am assuming you feel guilty for using that as a method which is why you reached out for support? Go with your gut. If you don't feel that its right for you for her to cry for 15 mins, then don't. But if you don't think it did her any harm and it worked, then I say let her cry for 15 mins. You are the person who is best equipped to make the call and to judge if its the right approach. I will say that the reflux sounds suspect. Our DD reflux symptoms were always way worse during the day. It would start on the second bottle of the day and be bad for a few bottles, then the late night bottle and middle of the night ones would be better. Perhaps the meds are not working well enough for her? Perhaps you should try another one? This could be disturbing her day time sleep. It sounds crazy that there would be a different between night and day, but I think it had something to do with her being more relaxed and in a deeper sleep at night. We let ours cry for 10 - 15 mins around 9/10 weeks. We started doing sleep training at 10 weeks. Bed time was around 8/830. Soothe till really drowsey (eyes rolling in back of head) and then put down. We would repeat the soothing process if they woke (which was often) Place back in bed and walk out. We did this for naps and night sleep. I was really structured about the process and did it exactly the same for every sleep. If both cried at the same time and I was alone, then I would rock one in my arms while bouncing the other in a bouncy chair with my foot. After a very exhausting and long 2 weeks of this, they stopped waking after we would place them down (after the soothing process). Eventually, we stopped soothing all together. From about 4 months of age, we've been able to place them in their cribs fully awake and they will fall asleep on their own. Occasionally they will cry and we would just let them go. It never lasted more than 30 mins and I could count the number of times we've let both of them cry on two hands. Teaching them to fall asleep on their own by putting them in their bed really, really drowsey is why ours sleep so well now. Lots of work up front, but it really pays off. I am not a full CIO fan, for instance I would not let it go on for more much more than 30 mins. but it works for us when we need to go to it and our babies are well rested and perfectly adjusted.
Thank you all for te advice. I am not really doing CIO at this time. Some of you suggested that I rock her until she is deep asleep. I rocked for two hours today andshe never got there. Anytime I would move my arm or adjust anything, those eyes would pop open. You would think she was not tired but she was. Yesterday, we had the same problem, but it was my dad who rocked. My parents eventually put her down and let her cry for 10-15 minutes and picked her back up. Like today, that was when she finally went into a deep sleep. It's almos like she needs to cry for a bit to settle down. I HATE letting them cry at 2 months but when you need to eat and use the restroom....... I agree witj those who said it may ne the reflux. RJ, that is what ally does. During the day she fusses, bit she is fine at night; waking to eat ten right back to sleep.
Like a PP said, it's all about survival right now.. so you just have to whatever works. If she won't settle down in her crib, have you tried a sling? A lot of people have had success with wearing their babies in moby wraps so their hands were free to tend to the other baby and do other things. Also, if she likes rocking, have you tried the swing or a vibrating bouncy chair? The swing never worked for us, but a lot of babies go right to sleep in the swing. Perhaps being slightly inclined will help the reflux too. I would also have the reflux re-evaluated; perhaps she needs to be on a different medicine or even a different formula. As for the sleeping through.. definitely just go with it! If he's growing well and eats well during the day enjoy the fact that he's got himself on a great schedule and work on getting your dd settled into a routine. And finally.. don't feel bad for letting crying happen to give yourself a break for a few minutes. You need to eat, you need to go to the bathroom, you need to take a breather every few minutes. If your parents are around helping, that's great.. use that to your advantage and have them rock your DD while you get some rest too. Don't ever feel guilty for doing your best!
Many studies have shown that a baby does not enter deep sleep while moving or being rocked (this includes car seats, parents arms, swings, ect.) Have you read Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child? I think that some of his suggested methods might really help you out. We considered it the 'sleep bible' in our house. I'm still referring to it when glitches arise and its always right on the money. Our DD with the reflux issue was on the Target version of Similac Sensitive. It was 1/2 the price of the Similac brand. Its a lactose free milk based formula. We went through several before landing on this one. It worked better than the rest, but we still had issues. First few days she was constipated, but then adjusted after we gave her prune juice. We also used a crib wedge, which we loved and could not live without. Anytime she slept, she was elevated. Its only about 1.5 inches high, but it made a huge difference. You can buy it at target. If you need the name of it, let me know and I'll go dig it out and find out. We also rolled a towel up and placed under her mattress. We did this till nearly 5 months. Is she falling asleep right after her bottle (in your arms?) We always had to place our reflux DD in her bouncer after her bottle for 25 mins. We also swaddles until 4.5 months. Stopped because they were fighting it and breaking out/waking up.
Letting her cry even for thirty minutes at this age is harder on than it is on her. I had one that was like this too. As soon as you would move to put her down she would wake right back up. We started with soem CIO pretty early because that is all that seemed to work. And sometimes they jsut had to cry while I went outside for my own sanity. Do not feel guilty about letting her cry. Some babies cry for that 15 minutes as a way to release and pent up energy. In a previous post someone mentioned the book Healthy Sleep Habbits Happy child......well the author has one specifically designed for twins that I found much more helpful. They are not too young to start sleep training. Def. get the reflux checked again. We had awful reflux and changed formula four times before finding what worked for us. Good Luck.
