What are you doing about Christmas parties?

So, the Christmas party invitations have started coming and I am starting to freak out a bit. The time between 3:30pm and 7:30pm in my house tends to be a bit chaotic, to say the least (this is when the parties are scheduled for). I feel like just saying "no" this year to everyone (except immediate family) but there are friends and family we have been ignoring over the last year or so that are really hoping we will make it to their celebrations (I was SUPER preggers last year at Christmas so we stayed close to home). Most have adjusted party times to accommodate us which make me feel even more guilty saying no. I feel like I am being selfish but the thought of having to bring everything for the girls (2 high chairs, bottles, food, PJs, etc.) plus everything to keep my 3 year old entertained and then trying to follow their routine while not in our own environment just doesn't seem fun! Not to mention the mess, the late nights...you all know the drill Should I just suck it up???

 

Our twins were born in mid-November, so it's a little different, but we skipped all Christmas parties for at least the first couple of years. Most of them were work things, not personal friends or family, and I just didn't see any point in going to something where I would spend the entire time taking care of the kids -- just like at home, only it would be harder than doing it at home!

If I were you, I'd pick maybe one or two parties that you feel it's really important to go to, and then make an appearance, but don't plan on staying long. People who can't understand why parents of twins don't "get out more" are people who have never had twins.

 

I am not doing any christmas parties. My kids are around the same age as yours and our insane time is from 4-7 so I know where you are coming from. If people want to see us, they know where we are.

 

We aren't doing any parties - just Christmas meals and gifts with the family, which we are spreading out. One on the 18th, one on the 25th, and the boys' birthday party on the 28th. I can't stand the idea of having everything so crammed together, and we will probably refuse any party invitations. We are supposed to go to a family reunion on the 26th, but I'm trying to get out of that one already. :laughing:

 

Hmmmm...My boys were two months old when we had Christmas. So Christmas Eve/day, we stayed home. My dad's family is all over, and most of them happened to be two hours away at my aunt's house for Christmas. So-we made the four hour trip total so they could meet the twins. But we don't have friend parties/work parties to go to. It's just my parents and his parents-so it's easy for me to say-go. LOL! But dh is Italian, and family is big for them, so for us to not show up-would be a big deal. And friends-well-it depends on how close you are/were with them. We have a group of about 18 of us, all now with kids, and we get together once a month for dinner. But we won't be having parties or anything like that.

I say-look at how many you have, traveling time, etc and see what works best. I always tried to get there for right when the party started, that way you weren't lingering as bed time crept up closer and closer. And I brought their pj's so we could get them ready for bed before we left, and then just bring them to their cribs when we got home.

It's certainly not easy trying to juggle the family, friends-and make EVERYONE happy. Someone is always going to have their feelings hurt. But do what YOU can, and like someone said-if people can't understand-they never had infant twins-and a toddler!

 

Thanks! I think what makes it more difficult is that our kids are the first in our family (both sides) and with the friends having parties there is only one other couple with a toddler so people just don't seem to get it! I also feel bad for DH as he likes these events and doesn't get as stressed about them as I do...I know he's tired of always saying no and is missing his friends.

The parties start this weekend so we'll see how the first one goes and then maybe make desicions as they come (there is at least 1 event/weekend now until Christmas). I did put my foot down with my own family and told them we are staying home for Christmas Eve/Day/Boxing Day (usually we all go to my parents and stay overnight and then go off to Montreal for my extended family). Our girls are still horrible sleepers and I would rather get the few hours of sleep I'm going to get in my own bed

I must admit I am getting excited to start our own traditions now that my family is complete. I have this desire to decortae this year that I have never had before . I'm sure the holidays will be a work in progress for years to come!

 

[quote name='E's 3' date='15 November 2010 - 07:24 AM' timestamp='1289823889' post='1721822']
Thanks! I think what makes it more difficult is that our kids are the first in our family (both sides) and with the friends having parties there is only one other couple with a toddler so people just don't seem to get it! I also feel bad for DH as he likes these events and doesn't get as stressed about them as I do...I know he's tired of always saying no and is missing his friends.

The parties start this weekend so we'll see how the first one goes and then maybe make desicions as they come (there is at least 1 event/weekend now until Christmas). I did put my foot down with my own family and told them we are staying home for Christmas Eve/Day/Boxing Day (usually we all go to my parents and stay overnight and then go off to Montreal for my extended family). Our girls are still horrible sleepers and I would rather get the few hours of sleep I'm going to get in my own bed

I must admit I am getting excited to start our own traditions now that my family is complete. I have this desire to decortae this year that I have never had before . I'm sure the holidays will be a work in progress for years to come!
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Where in MOntreal is your extended family from? I grew up in Montreal. I moved near Toronto in Feb.

 

I have some family on the West Island, NDG and TMR. My brother is there too at McGill. My mom grew up in NDG and my Dad was in Beaconsfield for several years as a teenager/young adult. My husband was born in Pointe-Claire...big Montreal connection Where did you live? How do you like being near TO? I lived in TO for a while and found it busy. I'm in Ottawa now. I would love to live in Montreal but it's sooooo cold...not that Ottawa is warm but it's not as bad as Montreal!

 

I grew up on the South Shore, Greenfield Park area. My aunt works at McGill though in the Education Department, deans office. Toronto is ok, I am far enough away that it's not so busy. I am in Whitby which is right beside Oshawa. I do miss MOntreal though. I dont mind the cold snowy winters. Ottawa has its cold days as well, I thought that Ottawa and Montreal were pretty much the same winter wise.

 

We just went to one party where we put the twins into Ergo backpacks and they actually did very well. I think we stayed from 3:30-7, and fed them a bottle around 6, skipped their dinner, and gave them an extra bottle when we got home. Our older child is a year older then yours though, and probably more independent, which helps.

 

When mine were little we would show up when it started and stay for an hour then head home. It got us ot of the house (a good thing), someone else can hold the babies (rest your arms) but not disrupt the whole schedule too much.

 

I think this is exactly what I am leaning towards for most of them. Make an appearance and leave . Then we'll pick one or two to stay over dinner (maybe).

And Slipper, I do think Montreal is colder but maybe I'm crazy!