What are/were your days like?

My babies are 3 months old today...and I am hopeful that the promised "it gets so much easier after 3 months" adage comes true!

I am feeling more and more overwhelmed with having two little ones. I am trying my hardest to get them to fall asleep within two hours of being awake...sometimes we are successful and there isn't too much fussing. Other times (like this afternoon), there is a lot of crying and even SCREAMING (I know they were overtired from an earlier catnap)! I am looking for the sleepy cues and can generally catch the yawning. I quickly swaddle (which often sets off the whimpering), give them a pacifier and put them in their seats. Sometimes they drift off, but generally I have to do a lot of soothing to get them asleep. They both prefer to be in my arms and it just doesn't work for two babies. They will sleep for a long time if they are held...but, they wake up after 15-30 minutes when they are napping in their infant seats. I try and soothe them back to sleep...but before long, 2.5-3 hours since their last nursing session has passed, so I give up and just feed them. I tried naps in their crib...that was a total DISASTER, as one fussing baby would wake up the other one! Now they nap in the living room with a little background noise (TV or radio).

I guess I would just like some reassurance that my days are typical for babies of this age (ie. very little predictable pattern!). I keep thinking that if I just catch those drowsy cues, the fussing should diminish and they will happily fall asleep?? Maybe they aren't getting enough sleep at night? I nurse to sleep around 8 or 9pm, feed again around 12/1am and again closer to 5am. After the 5am feeding, I try my absolute hardest to get them to sleep within 1 hour. Today they fell asleep with minor fussing...and slept for 2.5 hours! But, the rest of the naps quickly deteriorated from there...

Just needing some support...this afternoon has been rough.

 

:hug: What you are describing is totally a normal pattern for a 3 month old. They really have no schedule. It wasnt until 4 months that my boys started to get a predictable morning nap about 1.5 hours after they got up in the morning and they were not STTN at that point either. Maybe try getting them down a bit earlier. There is nothing wrong with nursing them to sleep instead of just swaddling them and putting them down. They will learn to self-soothe a bit later. Will they nap in swings? How about some white noise near their seats?

Hang in there. It will get better as they start to mature in the sleep department-hopefully by the time you send them off to college :laughing:.

 

mine are going on 4 months adjusted, i know how you feel lol. i have noticed that certain naps come easier than others, and will last longer (usually), otherwise..im just along for the ride and hope it gets a lil smoother real soon!

 

Surviving!!!! As long as everyones fed, clean and somewhat happy then you've done your job. I remeber hearing that the first 3 months are the hardest but I think its more like the first 5. Or at least till the babies are sleeping through the night and you are more rested and in a better mind frame to tackle the challenges of mamatwinhood.
It does get easier!! When it gets crazy just think to yourself "this too will pass". Good luck!

 

I am sorry you are having a hard time! I really found the first 3.5months to be really really hard! And after that it gradually became a little easier - gradually though! I had a bedtime of around 6pm for my babies when they were 3months old, I had a good nighttime routine (bath, lotion, pjs, song) that we did every night. Then I swaddled, put on white noise and laid them down to sleep. At that age sometimes I had to let them fuss/cry for 10min or so before they fell asleep.
As for naps, mine took 45min naps all days long, and they couldn't actually stay awake longer then about 45min, so they had about 6 naps/day at that age! I don't know if I had sleepy babies, but as long as I could catch them at their first yawn, or at the 45min mark then they went down easier (now I didn't say that it was easy or that there wasn't some crying - because sometimes despite your best efforts things will not go as "planned").
Hang in there, I think it was around 4-4.5mnths when the morning nap started to become a bit more reliable. Big Hugs!

 

Mine are 3.5 mos. I've found that a really consistent pattern of soothing works well for us.

I typically take the sleepier twin up first and set the other in the craddle swing. Get twin one to sleep (swaddled up and rocked) and then repeat for twin 2. They used to fuss quite a bit but now go down very nicely with minimial rocking when they're tired.

 

sounds pretty normal to me my babies are bad at fighting sleep....and night time is aweful for me I get home from work at 4:30 and usually they are awake when I get home and from the time I get home til 9:30-10:00 they will not take any naps.....it's just fussing from being so tired and makes it where I can't get anything done...my house looks like WW3 it's terrible....but they only way they are happy is if I hold them too. And even then it's not always ok.

 

Same thing here...sleeping in cribs only works for us at night...when I try during the day I end up going back and forth from crib to crib resettling them for hours, and like you said - time to eat again with no real nap!

This is what's working for us right now (to change in a week I'm sure, and also probably full of bad habits but we'll deal with them later ):

Wake at 6...diaper change and nurse them back to sleep...twice in a row (I put them back in cribs so I can get a few more hours of sleep...and the first time, they always protest, then I pick them both up, nurse for literally 5 more minutes and they are both out for another 2 hours+). We go downstairs to nurse the next time they wake...usually like 9:30. This is their favorite playtime so they usually stay awake the longest then. They start to get sleepy by 11 or so and usually will fall asleep in I put them in a swing or bouncy chair. We usually get a decent nap here, between an hour and 2 1/2 hours, depending on the day. Then everything goes out the window :banana:

From about 1 until 6, they play this fun game where one sleeps and the other stays awake to play...I know they're too young to plot this out, but they sure found a way to get mom's undivided attention! I think they both get enough sleep and play time b/c no one is fussy and they seem happy when awake, it's just a total guess as to which one will sleep when. Lately I've been trying to go out during this craziness...a walk in the stroller or out to a store...something to try to get them both to sleep, but if we stay home, they are tagteam nappers.

After 6, we usually do a lot of cluster feeding with catnaps, and I let them fall asleep right on my nursing pillow for some of it. They like being held and cuddling up like this (and so do I)...it really soothes them during the crazy fussy hours, so a lot of the time I'll let them just hang out there after they nurse or DH and I each hold one. If they are awake we talk and sing until they fall asleep. I know this is probably a terrible habit, but it's working now and keeps them happy so I'll figure out how to get them out of it later.

By 10:30 - 11 they are back up in their nursery, getting ready for bed (except bath night....then we start earlier). I nurse them and put them down...sometimes rocking them to sooth them if they are not sleepy enough. Usually they're out until 6 and it all starts over.

Again, it's always a little different, but that's where we are right now. I think you're doing fine...and hopefully in a month we'll be talking about how easy it's getting for all of us

Oh, one more thing...during the day I usually try to get them to sleep by wrapping them up and putting them in the swing or bouncy to fall asleep. If it doesn't work, I walk around with the non-sleeper or rock them. If they still don't settle in about 15 minutes or so, instead of wasting more precious nap time, I try to nurse them to sleep...maybe a bad habit again, but it's working for now! The baby bjorn helps, too...if one really won't sleep, I put that one in the carrier and do whatever I have to around the house...sometimes they'll fall asleep, other times they'll stay awake and we'll end up playing. GL and sorry for the looooong answer!!

 

What I do in the afternoon that seems to really work well is lie down in bed with one on either side of me, taking turns nursing them. They will both go to sleep that way and that's when their longest nap is. (In the morning they'll just doze briefly in their car seats or the stroller while we walk). I know I can't let it last much longer because they'll be able to roll off the bed, but it works really, really well right now.

 

My girls are just over 4 months now. I just now started putting them in their cribs for naps and not for every nap. When I know they are really tired and need a longer nap, I'll do it. Otherwise, they sleep in their swing or bouncy seat. Each week or so I find I have to do different things to get them to sleep. One week the binky and lovey will work. The next week, I have to rock them. The week after that, I have to hold them and pat their back. Each twin is different too. They each like to be soothed differently. It's exhausting, but some days are easier than others. I just got them down in their cribs for a nap without being swaddled. I just used the sleep sac and binky and it worked. We also have the waterfall soothers, which they love now. They only thing I'm consistent about is bedtime and that can sometimes change depending on the day. We started cereal not long ago and I try to give it to them an hour or so before their last bottle, which is around 8pm. They don't eat again until around 6-7am. We do have to give the binky once or twice a night to Ellie, but I don't feed them unless the binky just won't work. They take a lot of short naps throughout the day. Sometimes only 20 min. Sometimes, they'll sleep for 2 hours. You never know with them. I find as they are getting older, they don't nap as well as they use to. They don't ever stay awake longer than 2 hours. Usually 1.5 hours is when I put them down. I can tell because they start to fuss and nothing will make them happy. Hang in there. You are doing your best and it will get easier. At least I hope it does for us both.

 

Thank you all for your input! I just keep thinking I should have a better handle on naps by now...I guess I should just be patient and let the babies drive the schedule right now? I KNOW my babies are so much happier when they get good naps...and I want to have fun, playful babies. Not the unhappy handfuls that I sometimes have!