Went to the ped and this is what she said!

Hi Ladies,

So after much thinking and consulting with books, and people and you!! I decided I wanted to speak to my ped and see what she thought about our eating, sleeping and general schedules. I was rather surprised by what she said and wanted to get your feedback! BTW, my son weighed in at 17 lbs 14 oz (8.11 kg) and 66.5 cm (26.2 inches)!!! He grew 4 cm in the last month and gained just under a kg! Talk about growth spurt!!

1) I've been bathing and putting down DD and DS around 6ish. This is where I was finding they were getting cranky. She said that was TOO early and I should aim for 9 or 10 pm to faciliate them sleeping through the night. I was shocked. ALl the book suggest the opposite. They are 5 months after all. Anyhoo, today we pushed back bath time about 40 min and they were cranky but fell asleep in a second and didn't finish their bottles. We'll see what happens next

2) No more swaddling. She said we shouldn't have to at this point and that they have to learn to self-soothe. Grrr.. this one makes me nervous.

3) graduated extinction. We should start. I was happy with this one b/c i'm not ready for CIO

4) DS should have 3 meals of solids a day b/c he is hungry and watching me eat and watching his sister eat and so on :laughing: He gulps his veggies down and has his mouth open when he sees the spoon. Ha... that is too wild!

5) DD is a gagger and to have lots of clean clothes on hand :laughing: :headbang:

Anyhoo, what do you think??.... she said to go cold turkey with the swaddling and night training.

Wish us luck,

Anna

 

I got all of this advice at our 4 month appt. We immediately stopped swaddling and did the ferber method for falling asleep. It worked well. going to sleep at 9 or 10pm though? thats a rough one. At that age we did 6pm. At about 7 months we moved to 8pm and right now we are back to 7pm. Keeping your kids up longer than they want just sounds like putting yourself through hell! And a bedtime isn't medical advice, its just parenting advice that you can get from anyone. Your pediatrician isn't an expert in bedtimes Good luck!

 

1) You gotta do whatever bedtime works for you. Everyone always tells me I put my kids to bed too late (my hubby used to work until 1am so bedtime was after he got home), but it worked for us. Even now, the twins go to bed around 9-9:30 at night, it works for us, but for some, an earlier bedtime works better because they have to get up earlier. Mine don't get up until 9:30-10.

2) Again, do what works for you. I stopped swaddling around 5-6 months because they were breaking out of the swaddles anyways. You won't be swaddling them until college I promise, so do what's comfortable for you and your babies.

3) I'll say it again. Do what works for you. If you are ready for that, go for it. I did a modified CIO at 5 months for my dd twin, it's what worked for us.

4) 3 solid meals at 5 months is really, really, really early. I didn't do 3 solids until almost 9 months with my twins, and my dd was eating around 35-40 oz of formula a day at the peak, around 4-6 months. You're on your own there, I don't agree with that one (unless the offerings of solids are a very small amount)

5) :laughing: sorry, my oldest ds had reflux, he was a "happy puker", and he didn't stop puking until 18 months. Laundry was my enemy! :lol:

Good luck! I take my peds advice about things regarding health very seriously. But honestly, even he admitted, he's never had twins. That is something that you just don't "get" unless you've been there done that. And sometimes the rules have to go out the window and you just have to muddle through to figure out what is going to work best for you! :hug:

 

How long do your babies sleep at night when you put them down? 6 does sound early to me but 9 or 10 sounds late. I "think" at the age your babies are I was putting them down around 8 or 8:30. (lmao I just realized 9's not a whole heck of a lot later )

We swaddled until 6 or 7 m w the boys, they just wouldn't sleep w/o it and for my sanity I just swaddled. After that we moved to sleep sacks.

I did CIO so I'm no help w this one

We also didn't start solids until 6m so no help here either

Gagger or spitter = BIBS, and lots of them haha

 

Wow, that's a lot of advice from a pediatrician. Personally I don't see why she should be telling you about swaddling, bedtime, and sleep training methods as to me those are all parenting choices...not health related decisions so much.

For what it's worth we started some sleep training around 4.5 months, stopped swaddling once they learned to roll over in the swaddle which was about a month ago (tried before then and they weren't ready so I went by their cues), and our kids go to bed anywhere between 6 and 7:30 pm and in fact I prefer when they go to bed around 6 as they tend to sleep til 5:30 or 6 the next morning. No matter what time they go to bed they wake up at that time, so I don't buy the "put them to bed later and they will wake up later" logic.

Also I agree with the pps that 3 meals at that age is a LOT and you could easily risk him reducing his milk/formula intake which is not a good idea at his age. Babies should get most of their nutrition from breast milk or formula for the first year. Our kids are SO interested in our food, but we are still doing one solids meal a day. We'll probably add another around 7-8 months and then a third around 9 months.

 

I think it's great that your pedi gave you so much advice. Now, since it isn't actually medically necessary advice, you should sort through it & take what works for you, use it, and don't worry about the rest. I never had kids who went to bed at 6, mine were all in the 8:00 range & that's still when the little ones go to bed. Many people find an early bedtime works for them, though. As for the swaddling, we didn't swaddle at all so I have no advice there. Good luck with the sleep training, I hope it works quickly for you!

 

I agree with some of the other responses in that you do need to make the choices best for you and that the majority of the issues, swaddling, bed times, etc will be parenting choices. Every child is different and I think that the best thing you can do is to try out a few different things and then pick something that works best for you guys.

I strongly agree that putting them to sleep later is not the choice. Even though there are many different books and experts out there, I would assume most of them would agree that babies around the 6 month age need about 14 hours of sleep per day, including naps.

If your babies wake in the middle of the night, do they go straight back down with a feed? If so, I would always consider that a continuation of sleep.They will mature on their own and I don't think that pushing their bed time back to 9pm is the right thing to do.

As for swaddling, we stopped around 20 wks or so b/c the girls were starting to roll on to their sides and I was paranoid that they would flip on to their bellies and not be able to breathe, so we moved to sleep sacks and the girls didn't even know a difference, no disruption at all. If you are not sure yet about stopping swaddling, just try it out for naps for a while and see what happens, or just swaddle the legs and leave the arms free.

 

As a pedi myself, I will say that not much is taught about sleep or sleep training and it tends to be a matter of experience and opinion. I actually read Weissbluth's book as a recommendation on here and found the science to be spot on so I followed it with my twins and recommend it to my patients. I like the fact that he is a ped sleep specialist. I am a believer of the early bedtime: mine went to bed at 7 until recently and now are wanting to stay up a little longer now that they are almost 1.

As for the feeding, I definitely disagree! AAP doesn't even recommend starting solids for BF babies until 6 month and recommends slow advancement of it for FF babies starting btw 4-6 month.

Sleep training is individual but my opinion is that if you have lots of waking or difficult to lay down babies, the earlier the better. I did do CIO with mine at 4 month and they never cried longer than 20-30 min. You have to do what you feel comfortable with though. Remember though, that letting them whimper and fuss if they are stirring too early is not CIO, nor is letting them whine for 5 or 10 minutes when you lay them down. My DS will cry out in the middle of the night when he rolls over but he's not even awake, and if I go in there they both wake up.

Swaddling...I stopped when they could roll because we always swaddled with arms in and I don't like the idea of them on tummies without the use of their arms. Also, DD was showing signs of finger sucking for comfort so I wanted her to be able to self soothe. I went from swaddles to sleep sacks and didn't get rid of those till 9 month.

 

Thanks ladies, I appreciate your feedback. I am the type of person that likes to collect info, assimilate it and then make it my own. Especially with babies b/c they are individuals and don't fit into a mold. I agree with everything that everyone said. As of yesterday we pushed back bedtime by 45 minutes (taking it to a little after 7pm) and it worked REALLY well. DS slep nearly 11 hours straight, he had an episode of 4 minutes of crying where I left him and popped his paci in and that was enough. DD slept just over 9 hours straight and woke up babbling and talking to herself at 4am. I didn't pick her up until after 5am and she ate 6 oz and fell asleep for nearly 2 more hours. This was all done unswaddled and they LOVED being free. We'll see if it's a fluke or what but we keep them active and engaged all day long and so they are pooped by days end.

In terms of feeding. I totally agree with all of you. 5 months is WAY too early for 3 meals a day. I don't think its good for DS. He is a big kid as it is and although he shows a keen interest in food, I don't think he is ready. So what we've opted to do is give him his batch of veggies split into two. I.e. 1/4 of a baby food jar in the am and then another in the afternoon. His sister gets the other half and they seemed to like it. DS's formula intake went down a bit but to a level that is more appropriate for his age... he was gulping over a litre/day some days!! He seems content and happy this way. What i've decided to do is cycle through the veggies (we've finished cereals) and then get the fruits in there and by then we can start mixing and matching and making their meals bigger (i.e cereal + fruit OR cereal + veggies). For now it's all about the experience.


Slugrad-- my doc mentionned that are several studies in Israel that show the those kids introduced to foods earlier actually show a lower incidence of allergies. She mentionned that when she first started practicing (20+ years) foods were started earlier then the WHO deviated that number to 6 months stating that BM or formula was enough at that point in terms of nutrients and they were worried about early intro of food being linked to increased food allergies and decreased nutrient intake via BM/FM. Honestly it's an interesting debate b/c I was eating solids early and had no problems .... I appreciate your feedback. DH, who works in healthcare, was also surprised by her suggestion.

Thanks again ladies

 

I'm glad the change in bedtime worked for you! I hope it continues to work!!

 

I hope everything continues to work for you. It is nice to get advice from the Ped but I have to agree you need to do what works for you and your children. It is always nice to get advice though!

 

Yeah I don't think I'd ask my Pedi because that isn't medical. Unless there is an allergy concern as some kids with milk allergies have sleep issues. Some women in the medical profession can offer advice when they shouldn't. I read :"Healthy sleep habits happy child" as a pp mention and I've been happy with the results which show all the data from sleep studies.

For food.... yeah every country every nationality gives their kids something different at different times and somehow we all end up just fine. I think food is something you talk with your own mother and ask her for advice and have fun deciding between carrots or peas. It kills me the number of books on feeding babies !! Just know foods that constipate : carrots, rice, bananas, apples (but not apple juice due to the pectin) & foods that make them "Go": pears, prunes, peaches "p" fruit, apple juice, squash. UNLESS THERE ARE ALLERGIES IN YOUR FAMILY. Then test on the inside of their hand.

Heather

 

I have read those studies and I have always subscribed to introduce food when you feel like it unless there is a family history of allergies. You have to remember too that if babies get BM they are exposed to the food proteins mom eats from day one. The studies done specifically talk about intro of wheat, oat and potato. I started mine on solids about 4 1/2 months but it was really just a taste every few days because they really didn't like it. Once they really started eating solids I let them have tastes of anything. DD was loving fish from our church's fish fry by the time she was 8-9 months old!

The main point (which it sounds like you agree with) is that there is a difference between exposure and the baby filling up on food that lacks protein, fat and caloric density. Plus the fact is that someone without twins will never understand what an undertaking it is to feed solids ONCE daily, much less three times! We didn't get to 2 meals until 6ish months and 3 at 10 months!

 

Glad to hear that things have worked well! our babes go to bed between 8 and 8:30 and usually wake between 8 and 9:30.

In Canada they don't recommend solids until 6 months. Mine are 9.5 months and ds is ok on solids and has them still only once a day but dd is really having issues with solids, gagging and vomiting and what seems like allergic reactions but didn't come up on rast testing. All that to say, i can't imagine putting a smaller baby through what my dd has been through with food so definitely if there is a history of allergies I would wait.

Sounds like they did very well unswaddled great job babies!!!!

 

I am all for early bedtimes, Weissbluth was our ped and we participated in his twin sleep study. Mine started going to bed at 6 pm at around 2-3 months of age. They always slept well, my oldest was/is excellent (13 hours straight at 3 months, 6 pm to 7 am), my twin boy would wake up twice (around midnight and 5 am for a little bit) and my twin girl once (around 4-5 am until 4 months or so), before starting the day at 7 am ... My oldest now 6, the twins 3 1/2, everybody is in bed before 7-7.30 pm. An overtired child will have more trouble falling and staying asleep, so if your child is tired at 6-7 pm, you put him/her to sleep. Why keep them from sleeping?!