Weaning off co-sleeping?

We co-slept until the children were over 2 years old and then we transitioned them to toddler beds. The transition was smooth and bedtime works well with a good routine and them falling asleep peacefully in their beds. When we go to bed we open the gate of their room so they can some and find us during the night. This is something that I do not want to take away.

DS usually sleeps in his own bed and comes a few minutes prior to wake-up time for cuddles. It is really rare that he will comes earlier, maybe once or twice a month if he is coming down sick or had a really bad dream. This we are totally fine with.

DD is more of a "problem". I know she is a light sleeper and she has very vivid dreams, she will often wake up crying about an hour or so after she went to sleep (we go and cuddle her a bit and she goes back to sleep in her bed). It sometimes seems as if she were listening for us to come upstairs for bed because as soon as we are there (give and take maybe half an hour max) she comes, climbs in with me and goes back to sleep. So, she spends most of every night in our bed. Unfortunately, she is very restless and clingy so I do not get proper sleep when she is with us; she really grabs hold of me so tightly that I cannot move without waking her or that she pulls my hair, pinches me etc; when I move away she moves right with me. I think she needs us close by to feel safe at night and I am more than willing to give her this closeness and safety as long as she needs it. But I need more relaxing and deep sleep too to function properly during the day. Also, but no so urgently, DH and I like to read and chat a bit in bed. This does not work when DD comes in to join us because then she will be wide awake and wants to read or talk too.

For those of you who co-slept or co-sleep: Do you have any ideas either for getting her to sleep longer in her bed or to give her the closeness she so clearly needs without compromising my sleep so much?

 

Can you slowly transition her by putting a mattress in her room next to her bed, and moving it closer and closer to the door, while putting her back in her bed every time she gets up?

 

Or do you have space in your room to put her toddler bed? She might feel okay sleeping in the same room. Or I also gave one of my girls, my old teddy bear and told her I always slept with it (which was true I slept with it for about 15 years!) and she could hold it and think of me lying in bed holding it.

I'm currently transitioning my son into his own toddler bed. I sleep very well with him with us, but my husband is like you and he usually gives up and goes to the sofa!

 

My girls do the same thing & are usually in bed with us within an hour of us coming upstairs. We had each of them pick out a teddy that was their special teddy to hug & cuddle at night. We did that when it became a problem to get up & feed Emmett in the middle of the night without waking everyone, so we also explained that to them as why we couldn't cuddle all night long.

When I was pregnant with Emmett & there just wasn't physical space in the bed for everyone, we had success with having a little "nest" on the floor of our room that they slept in.

 

Thank you!

I think we will try the nest idea first. We don't really have room for her bed in our bedroom and I think they are not ready for bedtime in two different rooms yet, I don't want to disrupt our good routine there if I don't have to.