(Very) early potty training

Ok, before you call me nuts, here's our story. Jack had hypospadias/chordee repair about a month ago, and he has developed a fistula. Basically, the doctor created a new "pee hole", but the old one has broken open. The urologist wants us to force pee through the new hole to reinforce it and let the old hole grow closed. He suggested we wait until about 45 minutes after he's had liquids, then press on his bladder to make him go. Yeah right. Long story short, this does not work.

Then he suggested letting Jack run around without a diaper, and catch him peeing, cover the hole with our fingers and make the pee go out the right hole. We've been doing this for a week now, and caught him exactly once. This is a 2-person job, since somebody has to run around 2 inches from Jack's groin while the other keeps Nate from killing himself, so we can't ask our nanny to do it. This is making our evenings less than enjoyable, and it's rather hard on the carpets.

DH had the idea that maybe we should get a potty chair and encourage him somehow to at least signal us when he has to go so we stand a better chance of catching it. I'm not sure how you would do this, or even if it's possible given how young he is.

I know there is a "Naked and $75" potty training method that has you let the kid run around naked until he gets it, and spend $75 on carpet cleaning.

I guess I'm just asking if there's anyone out there who has had any luck in getting a child this young to at least recognize when he's going potty, or even potty-training. Or if anyone has any other ideas for getting him to go on command! :laughing:

 

Hi Valerie.Wow what a task you have!Hugs to you.
I was planning to do potty training for my twins-few months ago I bought potties and put in the bathroom.They see them all day long but no interest in peeing in them. They do not give me any sigh that they want to go or I just can't read it. So for now when I am using bathroom to pee I let them watch me explaining that mommy is peeing and I point at their potties saying that that is where they both are going to go. They always make sound like ssssssssss when I use bathroom, so they do understand peeing concept.
Another thing I do is before their bedtime I let them run without diapers( we have hardwood through out the house) and encourage them to sit on the potties and make sssssssssss sound.They sit on potties but quicly jump after few seconds. So far no luck.
All I can wish you is good luck.
Let me know when you succeed.

 

I haven't but I wanted to wish you lots of luck with this. I don't think it's a crazy idea at all since the alternative has him naked and running around anyway. :hug: Good luck!!

 

Mine are only 11 months, but I have met parents that have trained kids that early so it is definately possible. I know with working with children with special needs we use a time training method since some of them are not capable of telling us when they have to go to the bathroom. So they start putting them on the potty every five mins, then 10mins, 15mins and so on. by doing it so closely you hope to catch them in the act and gradualy increase it as they learn to hold it as well. IT is alot of work and a timer is good to set to so you don't forget. My MIL trained my husband at 15 months and she said she would just set him up on the potty with cherrios and a sippy cup in front of the tv to try and catch him in the act. I hope everything works out.

 

I don't have experience with this, my two are just starting to let me know that they are going at almost 23 months. Given your son's condition,I would say it can't hurt to try with him. Good luck!

 

When my girls were about 13 months old they were able to sign "toilet," which we used as our bathroom sign, somewhat reliably. We weren't usually able to get them actually to the toilet in time, but they definitely knew what was going on. Last month, when they were about 22 months old, they both completely toilet trained. We mostly went the "naked and $75" route, and would sign religiously whenever we saw them pee. Good luck!

 

We have had some experience with this recently with Jack. Because he has poop issues our pedi suggested putting him on the potty when we realize he is trying to go. It makes it easier for him since gravity helps him and it isn't as easy for him to tense up and "hold" it in. We have been working on this with him at home and at daycare and he has a good amount of success with it. He usually pees when he poops so he is slowly getting the idea and his brother is too. The hardest part is watching for the signs. With poop it is easy for me to tell they are going or getting ready to go. If I notice Jack starting to strain, we pop him on the potty right away. With James he tries to hide when he is getting ready to poop, but if I ask him he will either nod or shake his head. He doesn't usually lie either so he seems to know what is going on. With pee, both of them are starting to pull at their diapers when they want them off which usually means they have peed the most miniscule amount possible and want a clean diaper. We always try to put them on the potty before bedtime and we have success maybe 1/2 the time with each of them. I have found that the more they can communicate with me, the easier it becomes, so I would encourage trying to teach them a sign for potty or see if you can get them to say potty (or something) that would help give you a clue other than just running around naked all the time. Naked is easier, but I live in MI too so we all know that doing this all winter long isn't going to fly unless you want DTE to get all of your paycheck!

 

I know that the baby whisperer book has suggestions on early potty training.
I think it involves things like...have them sit on the potty for like 10 mins after they wake up in the am; same thing 30-45mins after breakfast, lunch, dinner, and before bed. I dont know, I cant remember all of it.

 

I think since you already have him naked for this other issue, you might as well try potty training. I have read several different books on it... and before they "get it" mentally it seems that you can still train them to go on the potty before they understand... by YOU putting them there when you think they need to go. That goes back to the "Elimination Communication" theory... that some people start very early... like just a few months old.

Several of the books suggest letting them get used to sitting on the little potties - even fully clothed for snacks etc. I got 4 of the little potties at IKEA for $3 or 4.... and have 2 in the bathroom and 2 in the play area. In the mornings or just after a nap you might have good luck taking him into the bathroom to sit on the potty. My ds has actually peed a couple of times on the potty when we gave him a chance. I haven't gone full force with potty training, but keep meaning to!!

One thing that I've seen in several books is that before disposables came out a large percent of children were trained before 18 months... and I'm sure is still possible. good luck.

And good luck with all the issues you are dealing with - wow!!! I'm sorry, hopefully he figures it out and will be a superstar potty learner!

 

I think that it is great if you are able to train them that early and I wish you all the best. I was wondering if there isn't anything else that can be done to block off the old hole instead of you having to catch him all the time? This seems like kind of an impossible thing to be consistent with with such small children so I am surprised they don't have another way. Best of luck

 

Wow, thank you for all of your thoughtful replies! There are some great ideas here that I'm definitely going to try.

We did ask about putting a band-aid or liquid bandage on the site, but the urologist doesn't want us to do that. :unknw: I'm just afraid if we don't address this he's going to have to have more surgery. I'll take a month off work and hold his penis 24x7 if it would help avoid that!! I think we may get a second opinion as well. We had the boy's 15 month WBV this morning, and the ped said there's no way we're going to have much success "catching" him or early potty training. (He's pretty old-school, and I'm not 100% in agreement with him that you can't PT boys before age 3. Otherwise he's a great ped.)

We bought a potty chair last night and they fought over "driving" it around the room! :lol: We'll see if we can get him to start associating it with peeing.

I do agree that cultures without disposables probably PT earlier, but it takes a lot of dedication. I'm not sure how much success we're going to have since DH and I work full-time, but I'm ready to try anything. If we can at least get him to signal us or move toward the potty when he has to go, we'll have better luck. I just want to make sure that whatever we do, we do in a positive manner. The other night DH scared him while grabbing his penis while he was peeing, and it kind of freaked him out. I don't want to scar this poor kid for life, and make PT even tougher!

Anyway, thanks again; I'm going to show this thread to DH and we'll see if we can find a way to make this work. You guys are awesome (as always)!

 

My son had hypospadias/chordee repair like yours (he's had 1 surgery & gets another in the Spring). I've heard about fistulas & agree with you that you wouldn't want to put him through another surgery just for that. But I think the running around & trying to get him to pee out of that one hole sounds a little crazy. Does your urologist have any other suggestions? I wonder what would happen if you just left alone & let nature take its course? But I guess leaving it alone could mean you're in a worse situation down the road. Hmmm..... If I were in your shoes, I'd definitely try the potty training. Hopefully, it'll work & you can avoid another surgery!

Good luck to you & to him!!!

 

we taught signs for pee, poop, and change.
mostly the twins sign change, often its before they even go- so I go to change them and they are dry! I tell them they are dry, they sign change again and we go sit on the potty. They still wont pee/poop in it, but they know they need to go.

try signing. Keep the potty out and take him to the bathroom with you/the nanny EVERY TIME you go.
Best of luck! thats got to be very difficult!

 

I really recommend getting "Diaper Free Before Three." It's full of great advice from someone who's not only successfully potty-trained her own kids at a young age but has also done a ton of research and is an MD. For the record, I don't think you're crazy at all, it's definitely possible and you're much more likely to be successful if your kids spend a lot of time without diapers. I started putting mine on the potty at 7 months (basically as soon as they could sit) just to get them used to the idea. Now at 16 months, they'll let me know when they need to go and will pee and poop in the potty with some success. It's really a comintaion of reading their cues and just putting them on the potty at regular intervals (after meals, naps, walks, etc). Yes, we do end up with some pee/poop on the floor (fortunately, we have no carpets!) And I don't expect them to train quickly because I'm not prepared to deal with even more accidents by getting rid of diapers just yet. But it can be done more quickly if you're willing to invest more time and energy. I know both my brother and I were completely trained by 2 (growing up in Eastern Europe were99% of all kids were done by 2, actually).

 

I read Diaper Free Before Three, and it was interesting... it did focus on training the younger child.

I also have Potty Training 1-2-3 and its got great info too... though it does mainly talk to 24 mo. + children I think... but its still very interesting..

http://www.amazon.com/Potty-Training-1-2-3-What-Works/dp/1932740104

I do hope to be trained before 2. Ours are almost 19 months, so I better get going!

 

Just wondering how things are going??? Since my son will have his 2nd hypospadias surgery in the Spring & there's always that risk of fistulas developing, I'm curious to hear how you all are managing. Please let us know when you get a chance & hope all is going well!

 

Hey, thanks for thinking of us! We made an appointment on December 4th for a second opinion with another urologist. We've had zero luck in "catching" Jack, and in fact I think he's holding it. He hasn't even had an accident in the last week, even though we're giving him liquids and letting him run around without a diaper for up to 1.5 hours in the evenings. This makes "potty training" impossible because he's getting no feedback on peeing!

We also talked to the nurse at his current urologist's office, and she said that most of the time fistulas close on their own. This is a 180 from what the urologist said last time; he said if we weren't "vigilant" about getting urine through the new hole, he'd be facing more surgery. :gah: So DH made *another* appointment for him tomorrow so the dr. can look at Jack's penis to see if the fistula is closing.

I personally think a little superglue and a bandaid would fix this issue, but that's probably why I'm not a doctor. :lol:

Hopefully things will look better tomorrow. I dearly hope that you and your son don't have to face this. Having to have a 2nd surgery is bad enough; dealing with a complication on top of that would be really rough. :hug: