Vent about SIL

Aaack, I am so glad to be at work this morning. SIL and her 10 week old baby flew in on Saturday. The inlaws had asked if they could all stay with us from Saturday - Tuesday. I thought this would be great, and give us time to hang out with SIL and her new baby, as well as DH's parents. Mind you, my house is not huge, but I gave the guest bedroom to the IL's, and I cleaned up DS room, to give to SIL and her baby. BIL was also coming over, so he could sleep on the couch. DS would sleep with us while everyone was here.

So, Saturday night I am making dinner for all these people while inlaws and DH go to the airport to pick up SIL and baby. I also took all 3 kids to the grocery store with me to get the food we needed for dinner and breakfast...by myself. It was a disaster. I ended up carrying both crying babies through the store, and my 5 year old DS pushed the cart and put everything in that I pointed at. Bless his heart, I could not have done it without him! SIL shows up....with 4 of her friends. No one told me there would be 4 extra bodies to feed. Not to mention, the seating or anything else like that. So Saturday night I have 3 babies, 1 5 year old, and 11 adults over. (7 of the adults are aged 19-21, I'm not sure if I can even call them adults... they were basically couch warmers. No offense to anyone that age, I'm sure it is just these 7 spoiled pre-adults who have had everything handed to them their whole life, that they can't even pick up their dirty plates.) I asked one of SIL's friends if she would feed my babies while I finished making dinner for all of them and she flat out refused! I was shocked... finally one of the other friends grudgingly offered to do it, while I was running around the kitchen feeding the babies and making dinner.

It's getting later and later...around 11 pm 3 of the pre-adults leave. All of the other adults have already left, so I ask the 2 other girls what their plans are, since they have been drinking... they can't really drive home. They all ended up sleeping in DS's room with SIL.

So now.... I get to make breakfast for all of them as well! Sunday morning, get up... make breakfast for 4 adults, 1 kid, 2 babies and 4 pre-adults. Get babies down for their morning nap, and take a shower. Around noon, SIL and her 2 friends that are still at my house say they are going to the mall and ask if I want to come with. I just said to SIL, "No thank you, I would go if it was just you and me." They leave, and I look at my living room! What the he!! happened? There are baby clothes, dirty diapers, dirty bottles, cans of formula and wipes everywhere! (none of these are mine!) Not only that, but people have left laptops on the floor. So everytime I put my crawlers down I have to move tons of stuff to baby proof again. I took all of SIL's stuff and piled it in a corner after she left. I started wondering if she was ever going to wash her bottles, or if she brought enough to just feed her baby without ever washing! I was so getting irritated...this is when I started drinking. The IL's look at me picking up all of SIL's stuff, and say I should just sit down and relax... I told them that was my plan, but I had to pick up all the sh1+ so I could sit down some where.

A few hours pass and they return from the mall with one more pre-adult. So once again, now dinner needs to accomodate more people! Anyways, all the uninvited pre-adults probably left Sunday night around 9 pm. I was exhausted, my babies were crabby, and around then MIL's brother shows up, who is flying out at 6 in the morning and is planning on sleeping in his car at the airport after he stopped by to see SIL's baby. Wow, can't let that happen, since BIL went back to school, he can have the couch Sunday night. I have slept like crap the past 2 nights, as DS is in bed with us. Needless to say, I have not got to spend a moment with SIL as she has had friends over the entire time.

Whenever BIL shows up he brings all his laundry... I told him once this was ok, the problem is, is he shows up on the weekends when I'm doing my laundry as well. I think I am going to have to limit him to 2 loads when he comes. It takes him all weekend to get it done....Wow, now I have nothing to wear.

I am so relieved to be at work right now, even though I am in some of my least favorite clothes, since laundry didn't get done, I'm just happy to be away from the tornado whirlwind of a storm that my house has become.

"End Vent"

I'm so thankful for my life and my 2 beautiful babies, my wonderful DH, and my great son. I can't wait for it to be just us again.

 

How old is your SIL? 12?

I'm so sorry you had the weekend from He!! That's SO NOT COOL!!!! The fact that her parents were there and never helped manage the situation or helped you with babies or food blows my mind! :umm:

 

wow... you had quite the weekend! and how rude of you sil's friends! i never acted like that wheni was younger. going to someone's house uninvited, not willing to lift a finger, but expecting to be fed! and you are a lot nicer than i am... i wouldn't let my bil come over every weekend to do his laundry. i'd tell him to start collecting quarters and use the laundromat!

 

Wow, you're so much nicer than I am. Well, okay, you're nicer than my DH. I am trying to picture this, and for the first meal he probably would have rolled with it, but after that he probably would have offered, in a pointed way, to drive the extras to a motel.

You deserve big hugs :hug: for your generous spirit, and can you pass your skill at biting your tongue along to me, PLEASE! I could use more of that.

 

OMG! I am so sorry you were surrounded by such rude inconsiderate people. I can't even imagine, I'm not nice enough to put up with that. Lets hope she gives you a huge thank you.

 

My SIL is 21, but as I said, she and her brother (not DH, the other one) as well as all their friends have been handed everything their entire life. They are all the biggest spoiled brats I have ever met. The sad part is, their parents don't have that much money, but they just keep bailing the 2 of them out.

Well, the IL's did help to some extent. MIL actually fixed probably half of the meal with me Sunday night. The first night they were infatuated with their newest granddaughter, who they had never seen. I thought that was only reasonable, they see my kids quite a bit, so I figured they should get to hold her and go gaga over her.

As for biting my tongue, I thought I did pretty well. I did get snappy with MIL one time when she was talking about SIL's wedding and how much she was going to pay for it. I am in awe that SIL thinks she needs some big blown up wedding when her and the father of her baby neither one have jobs, and they just think everyone else is going to pay for it.

It is almost 10:00, I've been at work for 2 1/2 hours and I'm still fuming over these people. I don't want to go home tonight. I might rent a Hotel room for myself and my kids.

 

Where was DH during all of this?

I would have probably dealt with the first night, but on day 2 I would have gone ballistic and kicked them all out of my house with or without DH's help. I also probably wouldn't have done so well with the feeding them, but them not being willing to help feed the babies. I would have stopped all food prep until the babies were done, or simply refused to feed anyone other than the babies.

All this goes to say you are a much nicer person than I am. And, though I am hesitant to admit it, I think I finally have to give the cake for the worst ILs ever to someone else (I really thought I had the market cornered here!)

 

QUOTE(beemer @ Sep 29 2008, 09:48 AM) [snapback]1002837[/snapback]
Where was DH during all of this?


Saturday night he went with his parents to pick up SIL at airport. Sunday morning and early afternoon he had to get up and finish our roof. He has been replacing it over the past week, and had a few finishing touches...you know, to make sure rain doesn't come gushing in our house. We both kind of figured FIL and/or BIL would be up there helping him, or at least keeping him company... since everytime we go to the IL's my DH chops and stacks firewood for them, helps FIL with whatever project he is working on, and does anything that needs to be done. And we allow BIL to use our laundry facilities, feed him every time he comes into town, etc. But no, the both of them sat on the couches keeping them warm.

At one point I went out to check on him, FIL was out their smoking, and DH asked me to get him a drink. So I run into get him a drink and bring it out to him... He is working on our roof on a pretty warm day! Later on FIL says to me as he is sitting on the couch doing nothing, that DH does not appreciate me enough, and that he should have got his own drink. I told FIL that he should have offered to get DH a drink, then he would not have had to ask me for one.

Then Sunday afternoon he worked on fixing our toilet, since obviously when you are 19-21 years old you can't follow a simple instruction, "After you flush, make sure the toilet handle is down". Our toilet handle is kind of sticky, so after you flush you have to push it down, otherwise the toilet runs and runs, and once someone pushes it down, the tank doesn't fill, so the toilet won't flush the next time someone comes in to use it. My five year old has no problem following these instructions. So needless to say, we have this house full of people who can't flush properly, so DH tries to fix the toilet, instead of fixing all of their brains.

 

QUOTE(twinmuffin @ Sep 29 2008, 04:59 PM) [snapback]1002963[/snapback]
Then Sunday afternoon he worked on fixing our toilet, since obviously when you are 19-21 years old you can't follow a simple instruction, "After you flush, make sure the toilet handle is down". Our toilet handle is kind of sticky, so after you flush you have to push it down, otherwise the toilet runs and runs, and once someone pushes it down, the tank doesn't fill, so the toilet won't flush the next time someone comes in to use it. My five year old has no problem following these instructions. So needless to say, we have this house full of people who can't flush properly, so DH tries to fix the toilet, instead of fixing all of their brains.


:laughing: Sorry I just had to LOL at this!

You had quite the busy weekend. :bow2: for maintaining your composure. I would have been over it once she showed up with her friends. I think life with twins and more is chaotic enough before having people descend upon your house for days.

 

The more you DO the more they TAKE... make mental note for next time NOT to have SIL stay with you. Also say for supper.... "I"m not making supper tonight I'm not feeling well, I'll just make a bowl of soup" and see what they all say. Dont' offer to pay for any pizza or anything.

I had my SIL stay to "help me with the babies" and she didn't make a single meal in two weeks. This trip she is staying at a hotel !!! Yeah

Heather

 

You are SO much nicer than me. Wow. I hope things are calmer now that everyone is gone.

 

QUOTE(heathertwins @ Sep 30 2008, 10:05 PM) [snapback]1006074[/snapback]
The more you DO the more they TAKE...


Yes, This is the biggest problem with SIL and BIL. DH and I are fed up with them. In fact, this morning in the car we talked about how they are no longer receiving b-day or Christmas gifts from us. They never give us gifts...they will receive some lovely cards (we don't even get that). My IL's continue to just give them more and more of everything they ask for, in the mean time it freaks me out, because a lot of it is their retirement money, and I see in the future being burdened with helping them out, because SIL and BIL took all their money! I could go on and on, but won't bore you with the details, basically they are greedy selfish spoiled brats.

 

QUOTE(Leighann @ Oct 1 2008, 07:46 AM) [snapback]1006419[/snapback]
You are SO much nicer than me. Wow. I hope things are calmer now that everyone is gone.


Yes, last night was wonderful! Just me and DH and the kids! We had dinner the way we liked it, hung out with each other, everyone went to bed when they were supposed to, we watched the tv shows we like. It was so nice

 

Oh wow. You are very nice. I think I would have taken dh apart after dinner on the first night and asked him to talk to his family. So rude!!!!

 

Wendy, I am so glad they are GONE!!!! :banana:

 

I would have freaked and thrown them all out! No wonder you started drinking! It's probably the only way you could cope! Glad to hear that you have your house back to "normal" and everyone gone! Sound like your SIL will need some ground rules next time!

 

OMG - I would have flipped out. I'm a super calm patient person but they would have put me over the edge.

:bow2: I bow before you, oh mighty one!