update on our potty regression

okay, so per everyone's advice, i put ivi in regular underwear, and she stayed dry for a day and a half. today, she had 2 accidents!!! what gives??? she can totally hold it, cuz she's held it for hours while out of the house. why is she just going in her pnats at home? how do i react to it? do i tell her i'm disappointed? she keeps repeating the line from "Elmo's Potty Time", "accidents happen, and that's okay!" (the song grover sings about having accidents. i'm hating that video now).
so this afternoon she peed in her undewear and on the carpet. so i took off her underwear and said, "fine, go without anything." and she cried and said, "no going peepee on the carpet!!!" she was afraid without any underwear/diaper/pullup/whatever that she would pee on teh carpet. so i'm figuring that my only option at this point is to just let her go bare butt for a while?
i don't want to put her back in diapers, i feel at this stage it would be taking a step backwards.
every hour i pick her up and carry her to the bathroom and sit her on the toilet. but somehow inbetween she manages to pee some more. and like i said, she's held it for HOURS while away from home.
HELP!
and tell me the best way to react to it!

 

Have you tried a reward/sticker chart - she seems to be following the thinking that if she has an accident its ok (which is not a bad message, but she is taking it to mean that is what she is supposed to be doing). I would talk to her about that being for little girls, but she is getting bigger, so now she gets to go on the potty. I would also start a reward system so that she is encouraged again to use the potty - stickers, toys, candy, food, - whatever you can do to break that pattern of - you may only need to do that for a few weeks before she doesn't need the reward system anymore. And, make a big deal when she does use the potty, lots of positives.

Can you find a video or song that talks about how good it is to go poo/pee on the potty? perhaps you can start walking around singing that song instead, and she will catch on...?

 

I think a reward chart is a great idea. I say do not let her know you are disappointed at all. Shrug it off and tell her, "Yes, accidents do happen" and just go on. I know it is terribly frustrating, but don't let her see it. That way, if she does want a reaction, she isn't getting it, and if she honestly can't help it, you and she aren't upset over something you both have no control over. I think maybe ask her about a toy that she would really, really like to have, then print out a picture and put it above the chart and tell her when her chart is full you will go and get one. It doesn't have to be expensive, just something little. Then, you could also figure out some sort of reward chart for her sister as well, so she can participate. My girls totally feed off of each other in getting their charts full and it is a great motivator.

 

I think out of all the challenges/stages we faced that potty training was the most difficult. I spoke with a couple pediatricians and basically they told me the same thing. Potty training is biological...their bodies dictate when they are ready. Learning this made me feel better and there were a couple times I just backed off a bit. It was easy for me to get frustrated and I didn't want them to feel my frustration...I wanted to keep it all as positive as possible. So we'd take a little break, use pull ups, then resumed after a week or so. We did some fun things like a reward system with mini m and m's or a mini marshmallows.

Good Luck!