Up all night

Hi everyone! I haven't been on here in years, but spent quite a bit of time here when I was pregnant with my twins and while they were infants. After that, life just got too crazy.

I am here begging for any advice you may have. My twins are 3 1/2 and last night had me up 7 times. Sometimes they want me to fix their covers "just so", move their pillow over an inch, etc. They were wonderful sleepers as babies, and I find myself longing for the days of swaddles and pacifiers. They were recently sick, but it has been about 10 days since they got better. They do share a room. I have tried a chart, taken away their favorite things. Nothing works. They are waking up the older girls and I am at a loss. I can't even be calm after the first couple of times. I am not a spanker, but have tried that with them and it doesn't help. They continue to lay in their beds and scream and cry. Last night I don't think I even got an uninterrupted hour.

Help!

 

We've had some of this recently too. At this age, I think you can talk to them and explain expectations. I'd spend the whole day telling them they aren't allowed to yell for mommy and daddy. We gave ours kid's flashlights, which they love. I tell them that everyone is sleeping and if they make mommy or daddy come in, I have to take away a flashlight or a stuffed animal. I reinforce every night that they can't yell for us. It's made a big difference. Of course, they'll still yell if they have a bad dream or something, and that's fine. But it's cut down on the requests just because they can.

 

Same thing has worked for us.

 

oh ugh! you think they just aren't tired when you are putting them to bed??

I know when I was trying to do the toddler beds they would get into all sorts of trouble, and mainly it was b/c they weren't tired. Now that they've started a preschool during the day, and no naps, they are really tired and go to sleep so much easier!

I'm sure that them being sick recently is playing a big part in your issues. But you might want to look at what they are getting for total sleep time.. Mine seem to only need 11 hrs now. so... if they are too tired and go to bed at 7p, they are raring to go soon after 6a!!! and if they stay up closer to 8p they will sleep until 7a...

good luck! I do agree with the rationalization that the pp said... telling them you will take something away, or even for us just saying that I will lock their door if they keep getting up... that's enough for mine. They would rather have the door open, and if I am just not into their antics I will lock them in... at least it gets their attention.

 

We have also just gone through this with our previously angelic sleepers (until they hit about 3.5yrs old). They were waking up too early, in the middle of the night, waking us up constantly - and I felt like I had new-borns again! Ugh, I feel your pain.

I made quiet a few changes and its all helped. I cut out naps, I use a sun/moon clock so they know when they can get up, I have a sticker chart and they only get a sticker when they stay in their rooms quietly until the sun comes up, we had problems with them coming out of their rooms so I put up pressure-mounted baby gates in their doorways so they know stay in their rooms and basically can't get out, I talk during the day about how mommy and daddy need sleep so they can do fun stuff with the kids, and then before bed I give them a pep talk that I know they can follow the rules. As for the little things like - fix my blankie, move my water bottle etc, etc - we practice these things during the day, and I give tons of praise for the kids being so big now that they can do this stuff on their own and they don't need daddy and I to do it. That has made a big difference for us. Also, I tell them that unless they are sick or need to poop (as we help with that), they need to stay in their beds.

Maybe you could also do a craft project about what to do if they wake up in the middle of the night - talking about hugging their teddy, straightening their covers, sing a song to themselves quietly, think of nice things, etc, etc.

Good luck - I felt hopeless a few months ago, but things are slowly improving with us.

 

Mine were the exactly the same way. I used a sticker chart. They stayed in bed all night, they got a sticker in the morning. They filled up their chart, we went to toys r us...it worked wonders for us and they were thrilled to be able to stick it on there. Sticker charts have always worked for us, though.

 

oh ugh, more of you have noted that it's started at 3.5 yrs old -- oh no, mine turn 3.5 at the end of this month!

anyway, I had to laugh to myself about the 'sing a song to themselves quietly'... my duo don't sing quietly ever... so I don't think I'll be suggesting that! but I love the idea of giving them ideas to do. that goes along with other aspects of life with the kids... to tell them what to do, not just what not to do - i.e. don't get out of bed. I love the idea of hugging their lovey or covering up etc.

 

Love these ideas! I used sticker charts for potty training... why didn't I think of it for sleep?! I also love the idea of the moon/sun clock. Thanks to all of you for taking the time to reply to me. I am finding this age to rather unenjoyable much of the time. I feel guilty saying that. Hopefully I can them back on the right track again.

Lisa

 

I might have to do this for one of mine. I was up with her for 3 hours last night! For the past month she has been getting up a couple times a week, but last night was the worst. So tired today!

 

Ditto here. My DD has not slept through the night more than 4 or 5 days in a row in her life! Only recently sense she is old enough to understand is I tell her "I can hear you, you see my door right there? Mommy and Daddy are sleeping, no talking, don't wake me up or I will come in and take piggy" and I have her reply with an "okay". So on the nights she does wake up and decide to talk to who knows what (like last night) I go in quickly and say "you woke mommy up, I'm not happy, no talking, roll over and go to sleep, I can hear you". She doesn't go back to sleep and I know she's still awake, but at least she is trying to be quiet...ear plugs work too! Once I know she is fine I put those ear plugs in! I would treat it like CIO...there is no reason to go in once you know they are fine. They will fall asleep eventually, blankets or no blankets. GL

 

Anna has been calling DH back a lot lately, and it's totally girl who cried wolf at this point so I've completely cut her off. I know the message is getting through though. When she yells for him, I get on the monitor intercom and tell her daddy isn't coming back up and she needs to talk to him tomorrow/find her own pillow/etc. The last two nights, she's just responded, "Okay mommy" and gone to sleep. They can be taught!! :laughing:

 

Cut out Chocolate milk, chocolate of any kind. Yup, we adopted chocolate milk from my mom. Was watching T.v. how caffene (sp.) stays in your system for 24 hours. Yup chocolate has caffiene. (damn spell check). HUGE difference HUGE.

Heather