Twins First bday party is out of control :(

UGGGH! I was just going to have family and then my bff invited us all to her dd's bday on the weekend. She was telling me how excited she and her dd are for the boys bday, bless her heart.. she's the sweetest. Soooo I thought, oh we'll invite close friends BUT dh and I only have close friends, we have our groups that we've hung out w since high school (or b/f). I have a big family to begin w and now w all the friends.... I'm DREADING this day. Thankfully we're doing it at my parents house by their pool but my nerves are shot about this. I'm PRAYING ppl can't come, is that bad lol

Tell me it'll be ok

ETA the other thing that is upsetting to me is that I don't want everyone buying the boys presents, I just want them to come and celebrate. To be honest I've just gone through de-cluttering this house and these are my last babies. we don't need anymore toys and I have bins of clothes from friends. Every time I tell someone to PLEASE not bring a present they laugh at me and say that they are. Help me here too, how can i get them to see I'm serious?!

 

Put on the invitations to: "Instead of gifting us, gift the children's hospital! All presents will be donated to the local children's hospital/women's shelter, so please bring unwrapped presents." (Or something nicer, along those lines)

Why don't you only invite your friends that have children?

 

It will be fine... just have a bottle of wine handy. :hug: Try not to stress about it (I know that's not easy) and enjoy it. Your family and friends just want to celebrate your babies :wub: and have a good time. As for the gifts, maybe you could give them another idea on what to do for them? Like donate to a charity in their name? No real ideas because my family wouldn't listen to me either. :sorry:

 

I agree with pp. It will all work out fine and they just want to celebrate with you! For my boys first, we had 80 people...in my backyard...in cool October. So I feel your pain! As for the gifts, I'm no help...the kids got lots of clothes/money and weren't too bad with the toys... Good Luck and ENJOY!

 

If you haven't sent out invitations yet, you could put something about the children are fortunate and have so many toys already, they just want everyone to join in the celebration. Please donate to whatever instead. I have seen this on a friends invititations for her daughter, but she still got lots of gifts.

 

WHat about donating to the animal shelter or something, if your kids like animals you could do that. My niece and nepehwevery year pick where they want t donate thier money, they always pick somewhere to help doggies!

if you stress you will not have a good time, it is what it is and you obviously cant change that, so just relax and enjoy yourself otherwise if you keep stressing about it you wont have fun! you are celebrating the first year of life of your LO's and everyone wants to share that with YOU!

 

We are doing two parties. An intimate party for just us and a few close friends and then a larger (much larger) party to repay all of the help we have received over the past year. I am sending out separate invites to both and for the second, I am calling it a "first year survival party" not a birthday party.

 

Instead of presents you could say that you are starting a college fund for them as their first birthday present and ask everyone to contribute. You could put out a special, decorated box for contributions.

Giving to charity is a good thing of course but people may feel funny showing up at the party and not gifting anything to your children directly and so they may bring presents anyway.

 

Love this idea. If you give people an option that they can still feel like they are gifting something, I think they would be more likely to listen to you than if you just say no presents. For really close friends/family, I would just be honest & tell them that you really don't need/want any more stuff around that you don't have room for it, etc. Most people would understand that I think. Other than that, just try to relax & enjoy it. I bet in the end you will be glad you invited everyone. :hug:

 

Thanks everyone! I have already sent out the invites... and only invited friends w kids.. which now is ALL our friends except one and I ended up inviting him too b/c I didn't want to leave him out haha

I'm bad that way too, when ppl don't want gifts I always still send a gift so I guess I shouldn't talk. I just don't want ppl to think that I invited them so they had to buy gifts for my kids... yet I don't think that or mind buying for other ppls kids. I guess I'm just an odd ball lmao

 

I think that's the problem-I'm the SAME way! I don't want people to think I'm just inviting them for the gifts-I just want them to come! And I certainly don't mind buying for other people's kids-it's fun! LOL!

 

Let's be odd balls together then lol

 

Hi, try to relax and enjoy the party. We had a big party at one year. It was a lot of work, but still really fun. I mentioned "no gifts" to everyone. Some people still brought gifts, but others didn't. It all worked out okay!

 

We had an out of control birthday party (60 people!) and it turned out a-ok. I was stressed until one of my good friends showed up with a bottle of champagne, and I had a glass and was quite happy. On the invite I asked people to donate to heifer international.. which is an organization that gives livestock to families in 3rd world countries. It was fun because people could buy the kids chicks or bees or ducks.. and we ended up with quite the list of livestock! And very few gifts.

Enjoy!

 

I like that idea!!

Also chicklet, you can have it in ur backyard, like BBQ or something so at least they stay out of your house & you wont have to clean up too big of a mess. Hope all goes well & it can be an enjoyable day for you!

 

I skipped to the bottom because I have to get off the crazy computer but we just sent out birthday invitations for my 5 year olds birthday party and I hand wrote a little note asking parents to please not bring gifts. Just come and celebrate and have fun. Maybe if it isn't too late if they see it in writing the will respect it. At least that is what I am hoping for. Good luck. Try to enjoy your babies big day they only turn one once

 

Thank you all so much for your input, suggestions and support!

We're having it at my parents pool, which is great! They have a big backyard and I figure most of the bigger kids will swim. I just had a new twist to this, my cousins daughter (I think she's 19) messaged me through FB asking if I was having a party for the boys and if she could come. I love that she loves the boys BUT I have 18 cousins (36 w spouses) on that side of the family PLUS their dc (which is what she is lol) I just can't invite them all... I don't know what to tell her. My parents have an annual pool party for my dad's family (which is about the same size as the boys bday will be haha) so I may just tell her that we'll "celebrate" then or I'll have them over another time. UGH so wanted just a small FUN party w our immediate family

 

keep in mind that at a year old the party is FOR them but not ABOUT them if you get my drift LOL...we had 45 people, rented a tent etc for the twins first...because there wasn't anyone I just couldn't leave off the list...if you have enough food (which if your family is anything like mine there's enough for a small country then invite her and maybe assign her to "watch" the boys a bit so you can relax and enjoy the guests!

 

How about telling her you would love her to come and help! A nineteen year old should be about perfect to help organize kids for games, and help out with serving food to the kids. I know it's one more person, but if she is willing to help you (set-up, organize, keep the kids entertained) it might be worth it.

 

You ladies are so smart, I wish I would've thought of that before I responded. I actually told her we'd celebrate them at the pool party my parents have for that side of the family OR that she's more than welcome to come visit on her own and have the boys all to herself. Wish I would have invited her to help

 

I think this is a great idea!
I know a big party seems overwhelming but relax and have a good time. Your kids will love all the attention. We had a small 1st b-day party and my kids loved all the attention they were getting...I cannot imagine how much happier they would have been with more people there! Enjoy the day, Momma!