Twin dilemma number 43687

So for their Kinder field trip the girls went to the zoo and any parent who wanted to go (who had done a background check) could go. I went and they let me have both girls in my group to chaperone even though they are in different classes. There were so many parents though that it just ended up being me, the girls, and one other child. This year they are doing things a bit differently. Because of where they are going, they are only taking 3 parents per 1st grade class. It will be a lottery so there's a chance this whole situation is a moot point. My problem is if I get my name drawn, I will be chaperoning for ONE class and ONE twin. I don't know what to do. One of the girls says don't put my name in at all so that it'll be fair and neither of them gets me. The other wants me to put my name in and leave it up to chance...she's also the one who would flip her lid if I ended up with her sister. So what would you do? I'm tempted not to try at all, but on the other hand I'd love to go and be a part of it...but I don't want anyone to be upset, which will be inevitable. Advice?

 

Put your name in and go if picked. Then next year you can put your name only in for the class that you didn't go to. That is how I have worked room mom as well.

 

I don't know, I think I would just not put myself in at all. ardon: If I did get picked I know that either of my kids would have hurt feelings. I saw it this year with being a room parent in only one class room and having to attend those parties... the other was upset. I guess you know them best and just how worth it is to have the other be hurt if you got picked.

 

In our school in order to go on class trips you have to be a PTA member...I patently refuse to join the PTA so its moot for me - but my kids listen better to other people's parents - so I wouldn't go anyway...

 

Really? I find that so weird! And it would tick me off. Of course, around here we don't even have to have criminal records checks to volunteer at the school & that includes driving kids on field trips so I think I would be really annoyed if they started putting restrictions like being a PTA member.

 

Oh, sorry Lou, I meant to add that if I were you I would try to go this year with one girl, if you can, and then the other next time. It is never a bad thing for them to realize that even though it seems unfair in the moment, it all equals out in the end!

 

I always go where I'm needed. I just tell the girls I'm volunteering to make the field trip easier for the teachers. If one teacher has fewer volunteers, that's where I go. The other twin has the option of joining my group, or staying with their friends.

 

I'd do it. They'll survive. I was a parent helper for only one of my kids a couple months ago and the other one complained a bit but she survived.

I thought at that year they liked it better when their mom wasn't there anyway? Not yet?

 

I would put your name in the hat. If you get picked maybe the teacher will work with you. If not just enjoy your one dd and her class.

I'm wondering why you refuse to join the PTA? In our school (and it is very common) the PTA pays for all the assemblies that the kids get, it also pays for the recess equipment.

 

Thank you ladies! I appreciate everyone's input. I put the paperwork in for both classes. I know it might be tough but they'll eventually get over it. And again, there's a chance I won't be picked at all!

I also thought about this too. The girls' teachers are very nice and have been working together ALL year to keep the homework and spelling the same. I thought that was so super nice of them. It's possible they would suggest it, but I won't be upset if they don't. On the days I go have lunch with them at school they even let them sit together to both eat with me. Again, I didn't ask for that, I was splitting my time between the two girls and everyone was happy...but after a couple times watching me do it, they told me to just sit them together. We'll see.

 

Ha! Not mine. They still beg me to go to lunch all the time. :lol:

 

Do you have to do anything to join the PTA? At our school you just pay 5 bucks and you're a member. You don't have to attend the meetings or be on the board. Also, the field trip is free b/c of the PTA so they do good stuff over here! And mine are pretty good about listening to me in the school setting...now at home, that's a horse of a different color.

 

I patently refuse to join the PTA because of the snottiness of the members involved...also this year to be able to go on the trips you have to "earn" points by attending meetings and being their little toady running their little errands and whatever they dictate - the more points you earn the more chances you have to go on that coveted trip with your precious! Also too I just don't have the time - I'm a FT student (although graduation is right around the corner) and I simply don't have the patience to deal with the BS

 

Wow. That's pretty ridiculous. Yeah, I'd pass on that too then.

 

That is just crazy. I would complain about that to the principal and who ever else I could think of.

 

You've gotten lots of thoughts on this...and I have to admit, I'd go if possible. The unfairness of it happens all the time, and like whoever it was said, go with the other next year. It's a little different than Liz's situation...yours is one event, hers was an entire year of events. That would be hard for the left out child. But, knowing next year will be theirs, hopefully the other girlie will relax and just enjoy. Plus, I'm never above bribery, and maybe a trip out of the house (even if it's the grocery store) alone with you may make the other one feel ok about it (on or near the field trip day). ardon:

 

Ug amy. That's crazy... It's the PTA not junior high school. I'm thankful that the ladies who are the slate for this year's PTA are great. Last year I only met a couple of them, but no one was snotty or bitchy or anything. Honestly I was pleasantly surprised.

Lou, I would put your name in and see what happens. If the teachers have worked with you in the past, they might let chaperone both girls along with classmates,

 

That is totally ridiculous, Amy!!! I wouldn't join either!

 

That is insane and that alone would totally pi$$ me off. Sounds like some control freaks run that school. Does the principal exert any power, or do the PTA women make all the decisions? Why does the PTA even have a say in how the field trips are run? I'm sure they have a big hand in the financial end of the field trip, but that doesn't mean they should be able to decide how it all works.

Yeah, pretty sure if my PTA worked that way, they wouldn't get my dimes or extra help on anything. I can't stand that kind of stuff, and I"m a teacher, so I wouldn't get to go on any of the trips with my kids anyway. It's the principle of the matter! Ugh!