TV guilt

My twins are 22 months old and I usually try to limit their TV. Lately they have been really, really crabby and it seems like all they want to do is watch TV (Baby Einstein, Elmo, Teletubbies) If I keep the TV off they are clingy, getting into trouble and need me to be with them every minute. I can't get anything done. They are crabbly and crying and want to be held constantly. Plus, they keep trying to put the TV on and I keep shutting it off setting off multiple (no pun intended!) temper tantrums. On the other hand, if I just leave it on and let them watch a couple of shows in a row they are not crying, they start to sort of play with their toys while they are watching and I can actually have a few minutes to get a couple of things done. Plus they are just more pleasant! So you can see the temptation here! But I have huge guilt about just leaving the TV on and I'm afraid I'll create TV addicts. How strict are you when it comes to the TV? Do you have any tips for getting them to play for a while on their own at this age?

Shannon

 

I have little tv watchers too. Luckily they only watch at about ten minute spurts and then they start playing with other toys. I feel some of the same guilt, but I go through the exact same thing you do if I turn it off. There are actually a couple of times a day I put them in their room with a dvd to jsut give myself a break. I know the studies show tv is bad, but I look at it this way as my rationalization.....I grew up watching lots of tv and I still learned to read and write. I played tons of sports and even graduated from college....so I figure it can't be the most dretrimental thing in the world to let them watch some tv to keep my sanity

 

I agree...I know at this age, my kids basically viewed TV as background noise and you will notice as they get older they will start playing together better and you won't be relying on the TV as much. I put out crayons, blocks, their tool box, the art easel and they also have a play kitchen and using those toys, it has helped them to play together better. But I do try to keep the TV to 2 hours or less daily, if possible. The TV is always off during meal times, 30 minutes before nap and 30 minutes before bed, because my two need that quiet downtime before sleep. Don't beat yourself up about it Mama!

 

my boys are almost 2 and i admit...i have one tv on ALL DAY LONG...it's either nick jr or thomas the train videos or something else kid friendly...the other tv is news or whatever i want to watch. they both throw tantrums unless their tv is on but usually after it's on for an hour or so, they leave that room and come play with their toys. then we can play outside or sing songs or do other non-tv related activities. but i think it's a comfort to them so i don't deny them their tv time. i know there have been studies and posts and reports about limiting tv but a lot of the kids' programming is educational and now my kids are singing and dancing and beginning to shout out the alphabet, so until they go to preschool next year, i'm keeping my tv on!

 

I have 4 kids. An 8 yr old in 3rd grade, a 4 yr old in 3yr K (her birthday missed the cutoff by 5 days), and then 21 month old twins.

My tv stays on kids shows all day long. We turn it off at meal time, and after supper it gets turned to "adult" tv My 8 yr old is in the gifted and talented class at school, has honor roll or principle's honor roll every 9 wks, and loves to read, and to play outside My 4 yr old should be in the 4 yr class because of what she knows, if her birthday had been a week sooner she'd fit right in, but unfortunately, school politics is holding her back. But we can already tell she'll likely be in the gifted class when she gets into school.

And my twins are rambunctious, imaginative, playful little monsters! They have a wide vocabulary (well Rylee more than Liam, she's a chatterbox), great receptive language, love to be read to, love to play outside...etc etc etc.

I am a big proponent of moderation in everything. I have no mommy guilt about using the tv for some downtime. At the same time, I try to make sure we're getting some good playing in, and some craft time in at least a couple times a week I stay away from mindless shows (I won't name any names because some people enjoy it, but a certain sponge is not allowed in our house ), and my kids watch tons of educational tv We love blues clues, einstein's, mickey mouse clubhouse..etc. We toss in some Tom and Jerry for variety too :lol:

 

You've gotten great replies and input. I just wanted to add that I think a lot of it is about whether or not you are a TV family. I grew up in a TV family. We lived in a remote area and had one of those HUGE satellite dishes way back then. I recall many a fights with my brothers over programming! Ha! We were all in the gifted programs and college prep classes, all went to college, blah blah blah.

So yeah, the TV is on at our house a lot. We DVR everything and cut out commercials and never just leave the tv on a station. We turn the TV off to do crafts and build stuff and other imaginary play and play outside a lot, but I don't beat myself up about tv because I'm not trying to be that kind of parent. I watch TV and enjoy my programming. I expect my kids will too.

 

The kids watch a little tv after their nap (play school is on just in time!) but I think there are much more important/fun/creative things to be done!!

+ the boys attention span isn't big enough for more than 10 minutes at a time.
(I'm sure when they are a little older the tv will be a life saver)

My 3 year old will remained glued to the tv for hours if I let him! (him and Gene , who is 6, both get to watch a movie of their choice after dinner/before bed)

 

TV all day everyday since probably 6 months! :unknw:

 

the tv's on more than i would like here, but then my girls turn into zombies when it's on & don't go back to playing until it's off. i try to get out of the house a lot, especially in the mornings, because then it's just a non-issue, for them and me. otherwise, i try to find a balance for my own peace of mind - when i really start to feel guilty, i turn if off for a while & have a "time-in" with the girls.

 

We actually have very little TV for one reason only...the TV is 2 rooms away. We made the formal living room into our play room and the only thing it is adjacent to is the dining room and the front hall. When the kids are in the kitchen, the tv can be seen and we often have news or espn on for us. After dinner or before nap we will sometimes turn on nick jr to wind them down.

 

This is us. TV is in basement family room. Toys are in first floor playroom.

 

This is a tough one! I am in the same boat. We are considering moving the TV out for a while because I am constantly stressing over turning it on and off...heh heh. BTW - does anyone have netflix via the wii or other gaming station? We started watching a toddler cartoon called Kipper...SO CUTE! Also, crazy french kids claymation called Pingu. Anyway, I don't think I can live without the TV for them. I need it at very critical times to make dinner, etc. and they love to dance with it. I try to get out on outings with them to the museum and zoo and stuff and I play games with them also but not all day of course. Especially coming into winter this is only going to get harder. I guess what I am saying is...I can relate. They love the TV but can easily be distracted by getting out pots and pans, playdoh, etc. My problem is we have a dog that sheds and every time I take out kitchen stuff I have to rewash it all to get the dog hair off, etc. Ugh, extra work. Good luck to all of us!

 

We have a TV but we cancelled our satellite service and instead stream Netflix to the television through Apple TV. Works GREAT.

 

I struggle with this too. It doesn't help that I often have my own tv police in my house. My DH works from home a lot and if the TV is on, he'll come down and ask if I've gone over my 'allowed' time of one 1/2 show a day. I usually do a Blue's Clues to quiet them down before their nap, so if I have sesame street on earlier, he'll say, "so you're skipping the BC later, right?" *sigh* He might be home but he's 'at work' so he doesn't help me with the kids or anything, just breezes through occasionally. He has no idea of the tedium of a SAHM!

My boys do space out and do nothing else for as long as the TV is on, so I don't like having it on, because they turn into little zombies. But sometimes I just can't cope with their climbing, whining, and demands. And I'm bored out of my mind! I have so much I need to do, with cooking, cleaning and now getting ready for holidays and traveling. They won't let me work on my laptop and I need to do online shopping since going with them to the store doesn't usually work!

Darn, SS is almost over, there goes my break!

 

The boys don’t watch TV (22 months). I’m not anti TV. I don’t think it is evil or horrible for kids to watch. I just never turned it on and the boys are doing fine without it. That and I can’t stand children’s TV. I’d prefer to listen to my boys whine then listen to the TV all day.

Some ideas:
-I find if I give the boys my undivided attention time when they are clingy I am more likely to get something done for a few minutes before they need me again. I let them wonder off on their own and then work nearby on something.
-Right after breakfast is a better time to do stuff around the house at least for us. They are well rested and fed and usually play happily for a while.
-I’ve been saving all the toy ads we’ve been getting in the mail lately. I get them out and have them sit on the floor while they “look”. They of course have to show me items they like but it keeps them busy for a while. I talk to them to keep them interested like “can you find the car” etc. I also do this with books. I give them books and ask them to find such and such in the book while I’m changing out laundry.
-They love to “help” mommy. Don’t all toddlers love to be helpful? So I assign them a task like wiping down an end table with a rag or sweeping the floor while I do a bit of house cleaning. They each have a broom and a toy vacuum. They love to pick up “trash” and put away toys/books. They just glow when I praise them for being such good helpers. Toddlers love to help and be “big” kids. I have them help me sort laundry. I’ll hand them an item and tell them which basket to put it in. If I put the baskets across the room it makes them run off a bit of energy while they help. Eventually they will notice something else they would like to do and wonder off leaving me to finish.

Dinner is the difficult time at our house so I have to get creative to keep them from crying and holding on to my legs while trying to cook.
----I try to cook some on the weekends while the boys are napping and freeze things. That way if they (or me) are having a bad late afternoon whine fest… I just pull something out of the freezer and zap it. Veggies are steamed in the microwave and fruit is easy to add. I also do mini pizza once a week (I buy whole wheat small pita bread). We sit at the table and I have the boys “make” their pizza. They love it. They will then sit and watch it bake (I turn on the oven light) while I get veggies ready.
----I have also started having them “sit” the table for dinner. Nothing breakable but it keeps them busy.
----I sometimes cook the veggies first and let them munch while I finish the rest of the food prep

Everything takes longer to get done and sometimes nothing really seems to get done. But there is always tomorrow. They are only little once.

 

I completely credit Sesame Street with both my kids knowing their Alphabet by 18 months and now at 4 and a half my son can pick up a book and read it (and LOVES to read to his sister, us and his pre-school class)....Zoobamafoo and Diego taught them about animals and how to care for them (one of their chores is to feed the cats daily and they fight over who gets to do it!) ...they both love to sing and dance and use their imaginations (their favorite game is to play Backyardigans) and they both love the Fresh Beat Band - teaches them about the importance of music...

that certain Sponge is not allowed in my house either and its only in the last few weeks that they've discovered Tom and Jerry (and laugh like lunatics) and Scooby Doo is also a favorite in my house!

Rebekah - I think I'd have to take off for a long weekend (with the TV in the car) and let your DH deal with the kids without some sanity time...guarantee he'll stop sniping about the amount of time the TV is on!