Toddler Birthday Party Survival Tips

Ok, ladies.

I have never hosted a toddler birthday party before and I need your survival tips.

When the twins turned 1, we kept it low key and did an immediate-family-members only party. For the girls' second birthday (in just a few weeks), I decided to bite the bullet and have a party. I am hosting it at the park, so I don't have to clean my house or clean up much after. I have decided on a Hungry Caterpillar theme, complete with giant sub sandwich (with red balloon head), fruit trays, and cupcakes (green with one red mini-cake for the head) to be made by someone else and delivered by my wonderful mother. Decorations will be very simple (one green balloon arch, with a red head). Favors will be simple, too, and will double as our game - I bought green kick balls and will line those up to look like a caterpillar. Kids can take them as they wish.

That said, on Saturday, I attended a 3 year old's birthday at Peter Piper and it felt like total chaos. Granted, the mom is high strung, and it was a big deal for her to have all the kids eat together, play together, and get together to sing (I don't care if any of the above happens, and frankly doubt it will). At the end, she looked completely wiped out.

So, what advice do you have to help a party go well without drama and chaos? Am I foolish to think it can be done without stress? Thanks for your hints and suggestions.

 

My best advice don't stress it. Don't be ridgid in your schedule and plan a few games or activities as a backup if the kids look bored. I strive for controlled chaos at birthday parties.

 

Are all (or the majority of) the kids about the same age as your twins? Is there a playground at the park? If both answers are yes then I would advise not bothering with any organised games/activities at all (having a ball each is a great idea), just let them all charge about. If there is no playground then I still would not bother to plan any organised games-they are more trouble than they're worth with toddlers-but would say bring a few more things for them to play with so they don't get bored. In addition to the balls you could have bubbles and invite people to bring along their tricycles/scooters/ride on toys. If you have any way of playing music that could be good too as they can dance about.
At a 2 year old party the only thing I would vaguely organise is the food-don't put it out/make it accessible until you want the kids to start eating-and even then I would expect toddlers to wander away and come back again, parties are just too exciting for most toddlers to want to stay put eating for long.

I think it's possible to have a stress-free party, as long as you have realistic expectations of the children (which it sounds like you do). I hope you all have a great time!

ETA: My advice would also be not to open any presents at the party. With such young children it's likely to result in everyone wanting to play with the new things and cause fights and upset. Plus it's very easy to loose track of who gave what or to loose bits of things, especially as you'll be outside.

 

Your best bet is to not be too rigid about what should be happening when or have any set schedule. My daughter's 2nd birthday was just a few weeks ago and we ended up having to change the location of the party an hour beforehand and lost half the guests. Basically, just roll with whatever comes - while still having some general ideas of things that the kids can do. My daughter still had a great time and seemed to love the party.

 

All but 2 kids invited are under the age of 3 and we chose this park because it has two playsets and a large grass field right next to our ramada. One playset is for 0 - 3 years, the other is for 3 and up. So hopefully we're covered for all skill levels there. Also, we're going to take a bubble machine. I thought about individual bubbles for each kid, but my twins still forget to blow and end up eating the wand 1/2 of the time. I'd rather try to avoide stomachs full of bubbles. Also, as a last ditch, we decided to cover one table with butcher paper and leave out a munch of washable crayons. So, I think that is it for us.

This is my greatest fear right now. Generally, Tucson in sunny and warm almost year round. This year we have seen the oddest weather. For example, it snowed this morning and is hailing and raining right now... and supposed to be over 80F by Thurday!!! How on earth to I plan for Mother Natures schizophrenia? How did you notify guests of the change in location? I have 1/2 a mind to create a poster notice in advance to hang on our reserved ramada in the event of the unpredicted. I am also trying to collect cell numbers in the event I need to send a mass text.

 

I would go with collecting cell numbers for the mass text. It was a really small party and half the guests were staying with my in-laws (which is where we were having the party) so that helped me immensely. Everyone else we notified through phone calls and text messages. It might also make you feel better if you have a fellow mom (either a relative or a close friend) who can help with calls, etc. I think having the poster notice create would help relieve your concerns if nothing else.

I'll admit that when I first found out that we had to change the location and lose half the guest list I came very close to sitting down and having a meltdown. But I took a deep breath, reminded myself that she's 2 and doesn't know the difference, and kept trucking. She and everyone else who made it still had a blast.

 

UPDATE: Well, it happened. Friday was sunny and 70 - seemingly a good omen. HOWEVER, we woke up Saturday morning and it was under 60 and pouring. So, we sent the mass text and, like Mom2VL&S, we lost half of our guest list. The loss was a blessing in disguise because I don't think my house could have handled any more toddlers and their parents. That said, the parents who came were all great and the kids had a blast. After it was over, Twin B exclaimed "where are the people!" So my main goal was accomplished - the girls' loved their "first" birthday party. And from it I have taken some party planning life lessons that I share with you as my parting words from this forum:

1) Collect cell phones from one responsible parent for every child you invite and make sure that parent texts. E-mail and evite notices don't get the info out fast enough for last minute changes. Parents who don't text will need to be called individually; which is a pain, but thoughtful - especially if you have any dads who are flying solo while mom has other committments.

2) Plan food for only 2/3 of your guests - even under perfect circumstances, people who say they're coming won't show or will have a change of plans and you won't find this out until AFTER the party has started. Plus, toddlers are just too darn distracted at parties to eat.

3)Have to-go box materials available to send home the extra dozen cupcakes and sandwiches that remain as the party winds down. Trust me - the amount of food left over will be overwhelming.

4) Don't even think about trying to take pictures during the party - take a couple before, a couple after, and one or two during big things (like blowing out the candles - and ask a friend to do it). Otherwise, your pictures will resemble a "Where's Waldo" book.

5) When each child comes in, give them their own party cup (take N toss) with a unique sticker on it (especially for those too young to read their names). But also do the same for the parents (or find some way for them to identify their drink). Parents get so busy watching their toddler kids that no one can remember whose water/cup is whose. When everyone leaves you will have tons of full adult glasses and cups lying around. (The kid cups with the special sticker, however, will probably leave with their new owner, who knows that it is "MINE.")

So, good bye to the second year forum. This year has been awesome for us and it has been fun sharing it all with you.

 

Happy Birthday to your girls! It sounds like the party went great after all.