Time spent playing together without mom

My girls play very well together, aside from the occasional hair pulling or hitting, but I think that's pretty normal for 18 month olds! I often find myself checking my email, or throwing in laundry, or doing dishes and just checking in on them every few minutes to make sure they're doing okay. They usually play in the living room where most of their toys are, and it is completely baby-proofed.

Especially in the morning - like right now, they've been playing together without me in the room for about 45 minutes. I've been in the kitchen and dining room and I can see them from where I'm sitting and I can just peek my head around the corner from the kitchen into the living room.

Do you think it's okay to let them play by themselves for that long? Sometimes I feel like I should be interacting with them and entertaining them all day long - but then other times I think why not let them explore on their own and play with each other? That's a good skill to have, right?

TIA

 

Let them play. I think the things that we discover on our own can be more lasting than those that people teach us.

Marissa

 

Hey Sara!

This is my very post . My twins turned one last Friday and I do the EXACT same things with them as far as playtime goes. In the morning and late afternoon I set them free in their playroom and "go about my business" taking care of chores, cooking, etc all the while spying on them. I think it's benefical to them to have some time to explore and learn about the world on their own and together. I do sit with them the rest of the day, in between naps, at the park, etc and play, sing and dance with them, but I TRULY believe they need some alone time to play too!

Stacy

 

Sometimes I feel the same way. I have friends with one child and they are hovering them while they are playing and then I wonder if I'm not doing enough. My kids are more independant. They are used to taking turns and they enjoy playing together. If they want me to play with them they come and get me. I do play with them and read with them but not every second of the day. with us all being twin mommies you know that you gotta get to that dishwasher , laundry and hop in the shower any chance you get.....so I take advantage of their play time to get caught up on mommy stuff. I've just decided that twin mommies are different that singleton mommies. Anyone agree?

 

I let mine play alone all the time! I'll do quick chores while still peeking in on them. I find that they play better that way. When I'm in there, they want to just snuggle with me, and then don't really play! Let them explore!

 

Mine play together a lot without me. Sometimes it almost is better if I stay out of their way, like a PP said, they tend to crawl all over me and just hang on me instead of playing. I am on the laptop right now.

 

My girls are 4 now and have always played well together. We have had a playroom since they turned 1. It's a safe area with all of thier toys. I can do chores, shower, whatever and know that there is nothing they can get hurt on in there. I have several friends that have one child, or kids that are a couple of years apart that are not interacting on the same level. They are constantly having to entertain their kids. I have never had to be that for my girls. We do things together, I plan some activities during the day that require my participation or supervision, but I don't want my kids to rely on me all day to keep them occupied.

 

LOL..here I am checking the message boards and they are running crazy in the living room. My girls almost play better when I am out of the room...not always, but alot of the time when I am in there with them, there is too much jealousy over who has my attention...or whining for my attention. They need that "alone" playtime...and we need that time, too

 

I strongly believe in independent play - but I'm an only child, so that was REALLY independent play for me!

I like to think they explore better when I'm not there. Plus, DD is going through a phase that when I am in the room, she wants to be entertained. She brings me books and puppets the entire time - seriously - it's awful. I am excited she knows that I can provide the stimulation, but sheesh, it's really bad right now. LOL If I don't respond immediately after she throws a book in my lap, she starts to throw a little fit.

I escape whenever I can these days.

 

You are super lucky! I can't leave mine alone in a room together for 3 minutes without a fight breaking out. It's fine to let them play together -- I'm sure you get plenty of interaction with them too.

 

QUOTE(first_second_and_last @ Jul 30 2007, 11:53 AM) [snapback]349644[/snapback]
I strongly believe in independent play - but I'm an only child, so that was REALLY independent play for me!

I like to think they explore better when I'm not there. Plus, DD is going through a phase that when I am in the room, she wants to be entertained. She brings me books and puppets the entire time - seriously - it's awful. I am excited she knows that I can provide the stimulation, but sheesh, it's really bad right now. LOL If I don't respond immediately after she throws a book in my lap, she starts to throw a little fit.

I escape whenever I can these days.


That's how Bea is. If I am on the floor with them, she wants ME to build something with the blocks, put on a puppet show, draw her pictures, etc. If I am not available, then she will do these things herself.

 

I see nothing wrong with letting them play together alone. Count your blessings, mine don't do that yet, but I am looking forward to the day when I can get something else done while they play.

 

Mine are the same way--- they play very content without me in there. If I join in, they sit on me more instead of having creative play.

I say it's fine.

 

I was wondering this very same thing the other week. I let the girls play on their own in the playroom a lot while I get things done and sometimes they play together and sometimes they are each into their own toy. Sometimes I feel like I should be in playing with them so I am glad to hear that you also let your kids play on their own.

I have actually noticed that when the girls spend the day with my MIL they are worse at the end of the day and don't sleep as well because she plays with them the whole time and it is almost too much, like they get overstimulated or something.

 

I agree that I think it is actually GOOD for them to get that independent play time in, and you should encourage and foster it as much as possible. Not only does it help them become more independent and creative, but it also helps them learn to play with each other and negotiate on their own without you there to run interference. We also have one room set up as the designated playroom -- it attaches to their bedroom on one side and to the kitchen on the other. We have a gate up at the kitchen, and I can see them from anywhere in the kitchen or dining room. Heck, I can even see them if I'm in the shower because it's an extension on the house and they kept the original exterior window on the shower wall -- it has a curtain/blinds on it (obviously!!), but if I hear screaming I can quickly peek to see if it's something I need to rush in there for or if they're just having a momentary hissyfit. In general they play realy well together for extended periods of time, and actually I absolutely LOVE listening to them when they're playing by themselves. It is too adorable, the stuff they come up with. They will bring each other things, "feed" each other things they "cooked" in their kitchen, set up scenarios with their house/circus/castle/schoolbus, etc. It's really sweet and something they don't do quite as much when I'm in the room.

 

I do the same thing. I think it's part of the beauty of having twins, they can entertain eachother

 

I wondered the same thing? I guess it is normal after all :icon_biggrin: WHen they are alone playing is when I am able to get my Mommy chores done or get my phone calls in for work.