three kids with twins on the way

I have three children aged 4, 3, and 22mos. I am pregnant with twin girls coming in a little over five weeks. I am a SAHM and my husband works a lot of hours. So I think okay this is going to be an adjustment but I can do it. I am pretty independent and don't like having help as far as going places. My father-in-law tags along on occasion but I find him to be more like another kid than a helper. I know when the babies come we will be home for a few weeks adjusting to the newborn lifestyle again. But after that when my husband goes back to work (taking 3-4wks off work) I want to get back to a schedule. My oldest starts preschool three days a week the beginning of September and I want to put my two youngest in a library program one day a week. We also do parks and play areas a lot. My aunt was a big downer and said it will be months before I can get out of the house again without someone going with me. Note she has NEVER had twins. I can't do months. The kids can't stay home all the time all day long. They would go crazy. Me too! Yes of course I have days when I love staying home with the kids but we run a lot too. So am I crazy to think I can do this? I have a nice new double stroller and a carrier. I figure I can carry one of the twins and let my youngest ride. Or let my youngest walk and have both babies in the stroller. I can let them hang out in the stroller while we are at the play area (all indoor - enclosed - kid's can't escape) or while the girls are attending the library program. We can just go for drives sometimes or walk the mall. I would probably do most of my running while my son is in preschool. I know it won't be easy especially at first but please give me some encouragement or set me straight!!!!

 

My sister-in-law has 4 kids all under the age of 5 and watches my other niece (who is the same age as her youngest) and she is able to do it... You sound pretty organized and have a well thought out plan so if she can do it I'm pretty sure you can! I think you will do great! Plus the 4 year old will be able to help with some things! :youcandoit:

 

Thank you. You have made me feel better. My four and three year old are good about playing together or on their own. Heck so is my almost two year old. My three year old wants to be my big helper. She keeps telling me she wants to hold, feed, and change the babies. My son can diaper my daughter's baby dolls pretty well. I joke I am going to put him to work! I can be pretty organized but I know I could do a lot better too. I think a lot of that will come once the babies are here and my son starts back up to preschool. We can get on a schedule again. Everything has gone a little crazy here between the summer break and the million and one doctor appts which are only going to get worse in the next couple weeks.

 

i definitely agree that if you need it & want it you'll find a way to make it work - that being said, be ready to cut yourself a lot of slack too. as a mom to three already, i'm sure you already know the value of instant forgiveness when things don't go the way you plan!

 

So exciting for you. I also have five kids but my two older ones are 8 and 6 so not quite as needy. My best piece of advice is to plan around your 22 month old. My DS is the same age now and if he is busy and happy then everything goes smoothly. Our twins have just slotted into our routine (Not much choice as school drop offs have to happen!) If you can accept a bit of help, I found that having friends take the kids to the park for a quick play wonderful. I didn't get anything done but it make me feel abit calmer with some quiet. To your Aunt ... just smile and nod. You are the only one standing in your shoes! Good luck.

 

I did fine when my twins were newborns. I took all 4 of mine with me everywhere. My problems came when my twins were toddlers and ran in two different directions! It is amzing what some moms (like you) can accomplish with very little trouble while other moms can barely handle one child!

 

:bow2: That being said, this isn't your first rodeo. You know what it's like to have newborns and older kids and seem to be planning accordingly. Taking your older children to preschool & doing errands seems smart to me- that's one less child who you have to buckle. Plus, what are you going to do- go home for 2 hours or so and then go get s/he? It makes sense to me to use that time well. Your aunt is just intimidated- most people are.

 

:Clap: Congrats on your twins! It might take some time getting used to twins and getting out of the house since 2 is a bit harder than one, but if you want to, you can do it. Good luck!

 

I guess I am here to encourage and set you straight!! But as pp mentioned, you will definitely have to cut yourself some slack. I too am a mother of 5, and my twins will be 5 weeks tomorrow. I have yet to go run errands with the crew all by myself or try to take them to the park, I wouldn't have the energy to make it and I couldn't safely watch all of them by myself. I got 3 hours of sleep last night and the girls are on completely opposite schedules. I just got both of them down and it's 3:00pm. So I applaud your eagerness to prove your Aunt wrong, but it takes twice the time and then some on most days. I am looking at it from my experience at the present day - my c-section recovery sucked and by 4 weeks was finally feeling more like myself. Hope you have a smooth delivery and recovery which will make running the town right away a bit easier! Congratulations on your twins and you'll do great - just take it once day at a time.

 

I only have four kids - who were ages four and under when the twins were born - and I have taken them out tons alone from very early on. I am not a sit-around-the-house kind of girl either - so much easier to be out and about! You can do it!

 

Very well put! If your kids are accustomed to going out, and being "active" the twins will just adjust and conform to your schedules! Granted I only have a 2 year old and the twins, BUT I didn't have ANY help when they were born and my husband went back to work when they were 4 days old (3 to 4 days a week for 2 weeks, then went back full time after that), then he deployed when they were 5 weeks old. I haven't had any help besides a babysitter for a few hours once a month. We RARELY stay home all day, I really try hard to leave the house at least once a day, if i don't both me and my 2 year old are going insane!

You can do it!! And congrats on your twins!!

 

I love that you want to get out and about. Go for it! And keep is posted on your adventures!!

 

Thanks for all the encouragement ladies. I know it's going to be a big adjustment period and I probably won't really want to go anywhere the first few weeks but after that I have to get out. I have to take DS to preschool and run some errands. I feel better hearing there are other mamas out there that have done it or plan on it!

 

:youcandoit: You sound like an organized person - I have no doubt you'll be able to do this. Don't listed to your Aunt, or others who try to scare you or discourage you in any way. I don't understand why people do that in the first place? Anyway - my cousin had twins when her other two were 4 and 2, and her husband was in Iraq most of the year. She managed - and was 3,000 miles away from the closest relative. She spent a lot of time at the library over the summer, and took advantage of a few hours of 'camp' time at the local church in the mornings for her 4-y/o. You can do this. You know you can. Just be prepared to cut yourself some slack, expecially in the early weeks. Good luck!!

 

When I had little ones (without siblings) I love to go out. I did a lot of visiting friends to get out of the house. Just make good plans and it is doable.