This is not the pregnancy I ordered . . .

I was having a great twin pregancy - still working as a 7th grade teacher and loving it, eating lots of protein, drinking tons of water, babies growing beautifully, adoring my weight gain, not stressing, not worrying - just enjoying. And then, I went in for a 20-week ultrasound to have the babies measured, and I found out I was in pre-term labor. What are you talking about? Me? Nooooo. Can't be. I'm doing everything right. It can't be.

Twenty minutes later, I was admitted to the hospital, shot up with Brethine to stop my "every two-minutes" contractions (which I never felt), and hooked up to an IV for fluids.

The contractions lessened with the Brethine and fluids. Unfortunately, my cervix had shortened to 2.2cm and was funneling. I asked the nurse about work. "Work? No, no sweetie. You're not going back to work." What? This just can't be.

Since 20 weeks, I have been discharged from the hospital, admitted by the peri, discharged by the ob/gyn, and admitted by the peri yet again. And here I lie . . . 24 weeks in the hospital with a terbutaline pump in my leg, still experiencing 4 - 6 contractions an hour, and a 2.2 cm cervix that refuses to stop funneling. Steroid shots started this morning.

I'd love some positive stories from those of you that got some "hits" during your pregnancy, and made it through with hope, grace, and a fair amount of humor. It seems every time I come to this site, I see the wonderful pictures of twin mommies walking around at 38 weeks. I must admit, while I feel happy for them, it definitely leaves me feeling sorry for myself and my babies. I'll never dance around with them in my belly; I missed Thanksgiving at home and dread missing Christmas; I won't be able to decorate their nursery; and I have 24/7 to sit and think about blood clots, NICU, pre-term delivery, more meds, and all of the things that can still happen between now and then. This is definitely not the pregnancy I ordered.

 

Sending hugs your way.

Dianna

 

I am thinking about you and sending you big hugs and warm wishes.

 

:hug99: sending many hugs ur way!!! im not on hospital rest or anything like that, but i was taken off work at 22wks was having ptl and had to get a shot of terb and stay overnite in the hospital, i am now seeing my ob once a week as well as starting my nst in 3wks. as well as once i get to 28 i will see peri 2x each wk. im so sorry that u missed thanksgiving and i hope u can make christmas. So sorry and i know it is hard. the bedrest forum is really good an reassuring as well as many of the mommies that start out on bedrest end up going 36+ wks. theres a lady on here with TTTS that was told she wouldnt make it past 18wks ;-( but she is now 38wks and still babies just a growing. thats a good success story that keeps me going. HUGS AND MORE HUGS ur way!!!!

 

My pregnancy also went great........until 20 weeks. They did the routine ultrasound, and found out that my cervix was 0.5 cm and funneling. Doctor did not give me much hope at all. I was in the hospital for 4 days and in that time nothing happened, it did not get any shorter. They sent me home, and at 23 weeks I had an other ultrasound and I was 4 cm DILATED, yikes!!! They did an emergency cerclage that day they were able to pull the cervix back together to 0.9 cm and it stayed like that tilll 33 weeks at which time my water broke. I was on bedrest from 20 to 33 weeks. So there is hope, maybe talk to your doctor about a cerclage if it gets much worse. They normally don't put a cerclage in that late, but for me it was either that or delivering the babies that day. And at 23 weeks they don't give it much hope. After 24 weeks, they can survive. Good luck, there is hope!!!

 

i totally get where you are coming from and I'm sorry it's been so rough. I have some of the same feelings and I've only had a glimmer of what you are going through. It sounds like 2 more weeks and you are in the home stretch. Keeping your sense of humor is not easy when you're worried sick every minute of every day, but finding humor I think is essential to keeping sane and not going completely batty.

Fiona
baby a=IUGR/knotted cord/O2 issues
baby b=2 vessel cord, cpc's and hogging all the oxygen

 

Almost three years ago, I spent Christmas in the hospital. It was absolutely devastating at the time. It was a long road in and out of the hospital. But after three months of bedrest (a month of that in the hospital), countless medications, home uterine monitoring, doctor's visits, you name it...I delivered two very healthy babies.

This quote has always been very important to me, but it took on a whole new meaning while pregnant: "What lies before us and what lies behind us are small matters compared to what lies within us. And when we bring what is within us out into the world, miracles happen" by Ralph Waldo Emmerson.

Read it figuratively and it will speak to you about this arduous journey you are on right now. You have the strength to persist. Read it literally and "what lies within us" are two beautiful miracles that are waiting to change your world. You can do. For them!

 

:hug99: bless your heart!! sending you lots of hugs and well wishes!!

 

:hug99: It's hard when plans don't go according to the way they are supposed to. I hope the rest of the pregnancy is long & bearable!

 

Wow in reading your story I felt like i was reliving my pregnancy! First of all, I just want to say congratulations for making to to 24 weeks!! That is a great milestone.

I went into Preterm labor at 25 weeks, with contractions I didn't feel, dilated 2cm, and funneling. I know how scarry it is, and not knowing when the babies could potentially make their arrival is nerve wracking.

My girls made their entrance at 28 weeks and 1 day. They are still in the NICU but they are doing phenomenal. We hope to have them home in the next couple of weeks. The medical technology, and all the things they are able to do for premature babies is great. Are you at a hospital that has a level 3 NICU?

You can do this, and I promise it will all be worth it in the end. Every day you can keep those babies in is 3 days they won't have to be in the NICU. Bedrest isn't fun, but what really helped me is keeping a schedule (so I had things to pass the time), and keeping busy. I kept a daily blog, and not only was it helpful for those who wanted an update on the status, but it was also very therapeutic. I go back and read some of my entries from time to time and it is amazing how far I have come.

I will keep you and your babies in my thoughts and prayersl Keep up the good work and Keep us posted! Soon this will all be a memory! :hug99:

 

I felt the same way when I was first admitted to the hospital on bedrest. I was angry because of all we went through to get pregnant (4yrs of TTC and IVF) I just didn't think it was fair. But I quickly learned that so much of how you cope and make it in the hospital is your outlook. You will have bad days. You will have days that you cry and get mad. That's fine. Just try to keep that positive outlook most of the time. Remember that you are doing it for those babies. They have to be the main focus now.
I'm going home in 2 days after 13 weeks in the hospital. It's a miracle that I've come so far. It can be done. You can do this! Making it to 24 weeks is great! Getting those shots is great! Focus on the positive.
Another thing that has helped me is not thinking of the long term. Just take it day by day. And celebrate all those mini-goals.

:hug99:

 

[quote name='gina_leigh' date='Nov 26 2007, 10:32 PM' post='51Making it to 24 weeks is great! Getting those shots is great! Focus on the positive.
Another thing that has helped me is not thinking of the long term. Just take it day by day. And celebrate all those mini-goals.

:hug99:
[/quote]

i am almost 23 weeks and everything so far has been ok for me...but i know i keep worrying and i will feel so much better when i get to that 24wk mark....CONGRATULATIONS you are there!!! Your babies have an exc chance...so many ladies due to tts and other issues don't get as far as you and don't get to take their babies home. YOU WILL. Hang in there...god never dishes out what he doesn't know you can't handle. YOU CAN DO THIS.

I am not on bed rest or anything, so i don't really know what you are going thru, but from the other stories from mothers who have been in your situation, you can get past it.

I send you hugs and prayers and pray that it gets easier for you and pray for the health of your babies. Most of all congratulations on getting them to this landmark.

keep us posted with your story...hugs.

 

I know the feeling, I definitely did not order my twins being born 3 months early. It was a very hard time for sure. But very easy for me to talk about now because all is well. Sending lots of hugs your way, hang in there. :love0028:

 

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I just wanted to offer encouragement. Our situations aren't totally the same, but I went into the hospital in PTL at 23 weeks and came home 4 days later on bedrest/meds. Now, I'm going on 28 weeks and I just wanted to say that the past almost 5 weeks have FLOWN. I cannot believe how fast it has gone. I hope time goes by as fast for you. My husband put the Christmas tree up and I keep looking at it thinking Ok, Christmas will be here before we know it and I'll be that much further along. Take it day by day and rejoice in the little victories that are actually pretty big victories! Every day that those babies are inside counts big time!!

 

Wow. Your twin pregnancy could be my twin pregnancy! You can make it. It's not going to be easy, but it's all worth it in the end. Hang in there.
Do you have a some support? sidelines.org helped me tremendously while I was on bedrest & struggling with my sanity.
All the very best of luck to you,

 

I so know how you feel. Add in that it took 3.5 years and a number of infertility treatments to have my twins.

My contractions started earlier than yours, although I could not feel them either. I had no cervical length left at 16w4d, and had an emergency cerclage the next day. I spent the next 15 weeks on bedrest. At 22 weeks my cervix shortened back down despite the cerclage, they admitted me at 24 weeks and I got my steroid shots. Spent the next 4 weeks in the hospital. They let me go home on bedrest after that because I had remained stable. I did deliver at 31 weeks due to baby A PROM'ing, not because my cerclage gave out.

I missed out on a whole lot, but it is totally worth it in the end. Let everyone help you. Worry about cooking those babies as long as you possibly can. Bedrest is the second hardest thing I've ever done, the hardest being seeing my little babies in the NICU. I'd do another 15 weeks or more of bedrest to have avoided that.

 

I am really very sorry you are going through this, it puts things into perspective for me...I have had a very normal healthy pregnancy so far and just complain about the normal everyday aches and pains...I need to just realize that things could be alot different.
I know as soon as I was told I was having twins-I thanked God for blessing me with a pregancy-but I must admit I felt kind of sad because like you said...this isnt what I ordered. I wanted to enjoy my second and more then likely last pregnancy, and I knew that a multiple pregnancy meant high risk, lots of things to worry about and just all around harder...but this is what I got, despite what I ordered-
I will be thinking of you, and sending well wishes your way-I hope that things turn around for you and you are able to enjoy your Christmas as well as make plans for your baby nursery-just hold on as long as you can, soon your babies will be here and all of your dreams will have come true.

 

Oh gosh, I'm so sorry you are experiencing all of these things. I was lucky and didn't hit any bumps in the road until about 28 weeks, then things started happening uncontrollably and all at once. Pre-term labor, sky rocketing blood pressure, swelling, pre-eclampsia etc. I was on bedrest from then on out and got the "Work? No honey, you're not going back to work" from the nurses at the hosptial, too. They wouldn't even let me borrow the antepartum unit's computer!

One thing I remember being really surprised about was the number of nurses who told me how lucky I was that I hadn't had any problems before that and most women carrying multiples are in and out of the hospital their whole pregnancy! I had no idea.

Anyway...I just wanted to tell you are doing a great job and a lot of us know what it feels like to be stuck in a hospital bed all day watching the world swirl around you while you worry about your babies. You aren't alone...Hang in there. I know it's rough. :hug99:

 

So sorry you have to go through this.

I also had a great early pregnancy. I had no sickness, tons of energy, was working etc. then I went onto PTL at 23 weeks with tons of painless contraction, a positive FFn test, a cerivx that was 1cm dialated and funneling. The docs were not optimistic I'd make it to 28 weeks and I was placed immediatly on hospital bedrest. All I received was the steroid shots and hoped for the best. Well, I spent three weeks stable in hospital and was released to home bedrest, which I followed strickly. I also was sad about all I am missing (this is my first pregnancy and it took me three years and tons of ART treatments to get my two boys). But, I figured I am doing what is best for the little ones and will have tons of moments with them when they are born.

Try and build a routine in the hospital, it will help maintain your sanity. I did not enjoy the hospital, but I loved knowing my boys were safe and close to professional treatment and having daily monitoring relieved so much stress. It really gave me peace of mind. Dont stress about what "can happen" look at the positive steps and milestones, and create mini accomplishments.

You will do great and will make it throught this trying time.

Yolanda
32 weeks with twin boys

 

Hang in there! You are doing an amazing job. I also had an uneventful pregnancy until around 21 weeks. Then I had many BH ctx and spotting. After three weeks of the doctors telling me there's nothing they can do, I got a clean bill of health at 23 weeks. I am 24 weeks now. My situation is not the same as your's, but I understand feeling afraid. I still worry that my twins could arrive at any second, and my doctors give me little reassurance. Good luck and stay strong.

 

Boy oh boy do I understand where you are at right now.

I knew going into this pg that it would be difficult because of a previous pg.

Anyway, if you are bored and interested in my story, feel free to click on my blog link. My first pg ended in a loss, but if you go back to July 2006 yiou can read about that w/ hospital bed rest (and I only made it to 22.5 weeks....you are already farther than I was). If you want to read about this pg...it starts, I think, in May 2007.

It has been a journey!

http://careyayn22.typepad.com/2_hours_traffic/

 

I'm sorry that it's been so hard! I've felt much the same way. While no one can promise what will happen, there is great hope. I started having trouble at 26 weeks and have survived 7 weeks of bedrest to make it to 33 weeks!

Just keep baby steps in mind. Try to make it to the next milestone, then the next. Here are a few that have been important to me:

24 weeks - the babies can survive outside the womb!
28 weeks - the babies have a 90% survival rate!
32 weeks - the babies have a nearly 100% survival rate! All of their organs except their lungs are fully developed.
34 weeks - the babies can suck and their little bodies can coordinate eating and breathing!

You've hit a great milestone with week 24. Every day they stay inside is a blessing. I find one of the best way to bring about what you want is to 1.) be thankful and 2.) visualize the outcome you want. Be thankful for every day, fill yourself up with gratitude and joy that you've made it this far. You can even be thankful in advance! Thank God that this coming day the babies will stay inside. Also, imagine your babies as being full term - chubby and healthy and happy. I believe that this kind of thinking can help loads.

Another thing that helped me is to tell myself "God's will be done." That's hard for a mom, but it takes the stress off of you. Imagine you and your little ones being cradled in God's hands and protected. Whenever you have a worry, iimagine wrapping it up in a box and handing it over to God to take away from you.

You may think I'm nuts, but this is the kind of thing that helps me! I hope that you find something that helps. The main thing is to stay as calm and happy as possible. This board has been great for helping me to realize that a lot of twin moms experience this, and that there is hope. Hang in there!

 

hang in there! i dont think any of else invision a less then perfect pg