This can't be normal!

But maybe it is.

Emma has always been my whinier, fussier, tantrum thrower. She gets annoyed very easily. She has had some tantrums lately that take the cake.

What concerns me is that they get so severe, that she gets to the point where she can't calm herself down. Today I asked her if she wanted a snack and she threw herself on the floor and started screaming. My only guess was that maybe she wanted milk first. ardon: I left her there to throw her fit. She went on and on so I put her in the time out spot and told her when she was done, she could come and see me. Believe it or not, this often works. Today it wasn't working. She started to calm down, so I asked her if she was done and she came over for a snuggle, which is our routine. I start to put her down (gently, because you know we don't want to get going again) and ask her if she wants a drink and she falls to the floor and starts again. Now it's worse than ever. Several minutes later, she goes back to the time out spot and then comes for a snuggle but as she's sitting in my lap starts to completely flip out again, over nothing.

Now I notice that she is trying to relax, her eyes are closed, she's doing the deep breaths, but keeps starting back up, arching her back, legs straight out, and just completely flipping out. What is different is that normally she is thrashing and trying to get out of my arms. Today she wasn't. It was as if she was trying to control it herself and couldn't. So I ended up putting her up in her crib, shut the lights off, and left her there to calm down. She continued to throw a fit for about 10 min. but once she was calm she was fine for the rest of the afternoon. From start to end it was about 45 min.

Sorry this is so long, but I wanted to paint a pretty clear picture.

 

Insert Jackie's name there and we have the same thing sometimes. Mainly when she is tired. Or every once in a long while, hungry. Something else has to be off, but we have the "serious marathon can't calm herself" tantrums here occasionally, too.

Now that she is starting to communicate more, I think they are lessening, or maybe that is just wishful thinking on my part.

:hug99: those are hard, though.

 

Michelle, :hug99:

My Jackie is like this!

 

Michelle, I think it's normal! Sad, but true!! The don't have the language. The know what they want and probably can almost say it or see it in their minds, but can't spit it out!! :hug99: Those fits are the worst!!! Poor baby!! Poor Mommy!!! :hug99:

 

I agree, it's normal. Language frustration! :hug99:

 

at that age one of mine was doing the exact same thing. It's normal for the age and you are doing the right thing. the only thing I would add is to try to encourage her when she isn't in a tantrum to use her words or signs. role play out the same snak scenario with a different response from the tantrum. . . it will get better as their language develops over the next few months.

 

I'm so sorry Michelle . How terribly frustrating. I agree that it's probably normal and that it's probably language related. They are starting to really get this whole communication thing but while they probably know in their minds what they want, they can't find the words to say it? Let's just hope that as her language develops, it gets better. Lorien used to do this to me although not even close to what you described. I would say that it was only about a week ago that I am starting to better understand what she is asking for. But I still sometimes can't understand her and she freaks out and starts crying hysterically because she obviously wants something but I'm not giving it to her because I just can't decipher what it is she wants. Then I do the whole "Come on. Show mommy what you want." This has been helping me a lot more with her and I'm starting to understand her mumbo jumbo a little better just from hearing the same bizarre sounds over and over. Then I very clearly say, "Oooohhh. You want raisins??" This is also helping. I repeat the word to her a lot and she starts to say the word a little better.

 

:hug99: Chelley! Like the others, it's normal... or at least it is around here.

Tony does this alot when he's tired or too much has been going on in his day. ardon: He totally flips out and the only thing I can do to let him calm down is leave him alone. It sometimes takes up to 20 minutes, and he is yelling what he wants the whole time...sometimes I understand it but it can't be done {like going out for a ride } but other times I can't figure out what it is. I've tried what Melanie said, asking him to show me, but he's SO wound up that he can't calm down for a second to show me.
Angie gets into these episodes too, if she doesn't get what she wants. <_< But with her it's only been for this reason {so far} so I know what is she is after but it's something she can't have at the time or do at the time. Either way, it's frustrating and she, too, has problems calming herself down.


:hug99:

 

In the same boat here too. Matthew is miserable, but he has language skills. He's just miserable. ***sigh*** lol.

 

Michelle, :hug99: as much as it seems like it isn't, it's normal. This no language thing really does a number on them. They just get so frustrated that they can't control their emotions. I'm sorry she is having such a tough time with them. :hug99: I've been there, so I know how much it hurts to not be able to manage it or stop it from reoccurring. :hug99:

 

I agree with everyone else, Chelley. It's frustrating and sad for us to watch but it's normal. I think they get frustrated because they can't communicate the way they want & then they throw a tantrum. Then I think that losing control like that is sometimes a bit scary for them & they have a hard time settling down, they want to but just can't. Hopefully it will be a quick phase. :hug99:

 

"LAUREN" add to the list. All I can add is mine used to hold her breathe from anger and pass out on us all the time at that age. Used to scare me out of my mind.

 

Molly is already headed there, yeah (sarcasm) and she is just 14 months. She has started it really bad the past few days. I am kicking myself for not signing with her at an early age. I know it is all communication related and I totally could have alleviated the stress and anxiety for her.

 

Oh my goodness, this sounds just like Regan! In fact, the past two nights she has had "fits" at bedtime. We have no idea what was wrong or what she was asking for. My husband asked her to show him what she wanted and all she could do was stand there and scream. She gets so agitated and can't seem to calm down. We ended up putting her in the bed and letting her CIO. She fell asleep after about 20 minutes. She was the same way this morning, until we got to day care. She walked right in, sat down, and started playing. I guess I will wait and see how tonight goes. It breaks my heart when she has one of her fits. All I want to do is help her!

 

Chelley, like everyone else, you could add Rebekah to that list! It is a language thing. It'll get better as she starts to learn more words and talks more. This too will past! GL!

 

Emma will do the same thing on occasion. She just can't seem to communicate as well as she'd like sometimes.

 

QUOTE(becky5 @ Apr 27 2008, 08:43 PM) [snapback]742509[/snapback]
I agree, it's normal. Language frustration! :hug99:


I agree. Poor Mommy! And poor little baby! :hug99: :hug99:

 

Big Hugs! :hug99: I have found that with Ian -- he has a harder time of letting go and his frustration builds and then after his fit, he calms down. Then on somedays, Montana has a harder time coping with the perceived "injustice". IMHO, they have to learn to let go and move on ... sometimes its easy and sometimes its not. It all depends on the day they are having.