Third Grade Classroom Question...

I separated my girls in K, 1st and 2nd grades. Kaylee struggled in Kindergarten, started to catch up with everyone in 1st grade and is now in the top of her class in 2nd grade. Kylee excelled in everything classroom-related in K & 1st grades, but her grades have been gradually declining this year and she's starting to fall behind a little bit.

I think that I want to place them together next year. There is one teacher who I think would be a great fit for both girls. The problem that I'm running into is that the school does NOT put twins together in the classroom. Technically, we're allowed to pick our children's teachers, but there are lots of twins at this school (including three sets in our grade alone) and none of them are together.

The girls have done relatively well apart. They each have their own friends, they're confident in the classroom and they get along very well with their teachers. They are together for church, sports and at parties, and they will play together, but they're not "clingy." (Personally, the idea of only dealing with one teacher, one teaching style and the same homework every night, is a dream, but the more that I think about it, the more that I want to do this.)

I haven't taken my request to the principal yet, but I know there is going to be a long "discussion" on the subject. I would really like to have a strong argument for the same classroom. Ultimately, I think I'll win, but I'm very active in the school and I don't want to upset the powers that be.

Has anyone else placed their twins in the same classroom after separation? Could this be detrimental to their development or education? Pros/Cons on the subject?

Thanks for any help that you can provide!

 

My boys have been together for Kindergarten but I plan on separating them for first grade. The reason is that I believe my boys are compared to each other too much when they are in the same class. They are both doing very well, but I think they are thought of as a unit and are expected to be exactly the same on every aspect of their schoolwork. I don't think their teacher means to do this (and I'm sure that even I do this to a certain degree.....), but I feel like it's time to separate them. I kept them together for the same reason you mentioned - I much preferred one K teacher and couldn't stand the thought of one of them not having her. It has been a great year and I know they would do fine in the same class next year, but I just feel that for my boys, I want to give them each a chance to shine in their own way. However, if they both seem to struggle next year, and I feel that they are struggling because of the separation, I will fight tooth and nail to get them back together.

It is very convenient to have the same homework and teacher expectations. I can't tell you how many times I've copied one boys homework worksheet if the other boy forgot to bring his home! Copy machines are wonderful! It's also nice to just have one teacher to meet with and one classroom to volunteer in, etc... However, if the school is going to balk at putting your girls back together, I think you would do well to formulate a good argument for WHY you think it is in the girls best interest to be in the same classroom.

 

My twins were together for K and 1st then separated this year for 2nd. I will be putting them back together for 3rd. The main reason is each year I ask them what they want and last year they wanted separate rooms, this year when I asked they wanted to be put back together.

I am so happy they made this decision. They are independent and do their own thing but are often made a home because they want to do what the other teacher is doing. My challenges this year have been one teacher who gives 10 min. of homework and the other who gives 1hr. One teacher who did the whole multiplication table and other who did only 1,2,5 and 10 (my dd was really jealous that her brother got to do it all).

Before I decided I asked both teachers and the principal about tracking because my ds is going to be tested for gate and my dd is only slightly above average. I didn't want them to suffer academically by being together even though they are at different levels. I thought I was going to have to fight to have them together because of comments the principal has made in the past. Surprisingly she is not fighting me. I was prepared to go to the school board if necessary. Here our MOMs club will hire an advocate to help fight this battle.

 

Just so you know, from what I have heard, 3rd grade is a tough year. In our school it is used as a transition year. The teachers here, push for more independence. They are responsible for everything. The teacher no longer tells them what needs to be done. They have to be proactive and do it for themselves without reminding. I don't think that it has to do with being together or separate from her twin. I wouldn't necessarily put them back together because of that though.

 

If you have one teacher in mind who you think would be a great fit for both of them then I would put them both in that class. Parents should decide if their multiples should be together or not, not a law or a school, IMO.

 

Wow, I am really surprised that you can actually pick your teacher for the next year! Our school used to allow requests, now the only requests are if you have an older sibling who had a teacher, you can request/not request that teacher for the following year. Or if a teacher lives in close proximity to your house (like on your block) you can ask not to have that teacher. I like this, because parent requests were making it very difficult for the classrooms to be balanced. In addition, good teachers were ending up with bad reputations, because they would be given the difficult classes year after year, which would make it hard for them to effectively teach. Also, sometimes, be careful what you wish for, because two years in a row, my friends son got the teacher she wanted, only to learn that their reputations didn't match what was best for her son (the fun 2nd grade teacher that he got, ended up not being able to work really well with gifted children).

One reason I wouldn't want to put mine together, is that my son who has been way ahead in reading, has his a stumbling block this year, and his brother has soared way ahead (sounds something like what you described), and I wouldn't want the teacher or themselves to constantly be comparing themselves to each other. I don't think it would be fair to the boys, or their teacher!

 

That does seem unfair. Don't teachers at the same school have to follow a curriculum standard?

 

Multiplication is actually the main part of the third grade curriculum, that a teacher would do the entire chart in 2nd, is really unusual. It isn't uncommon to start with the 1, 2, 5, and 10's since they are just taught using skip counting, and by second grade, all the kids should be able to skip count by those numbers.

 

There are state requirements that have the bare min. that needs to be covered in the school year. 2,5 and 10's for multiplication are in the state standards....the rest were bonus. My dd's teacher is sticking strictly to the standards, my ds's teacher is adding in a ton. One of his 2 teachers is the reading coordinator for the district and they also do more advanced reading material based on her love of the subject.

 

My concern if this were my girls would be the comparisons that inevitably happen, especially in this early preteen stage. One of my girls excells in just about every subject (okay not phys ed) and one who does very well, but not to the point of what her sister does. I had been concerned about them being apart in 1st grade, but it ended up being a godsend. No one, other than family, compares the two of them. They have both the same and different friends, and no one realizes that they are at such different levels academically.

This year I had an interesting dilemma. Because their class is large, a new teacher/class was added in first grade, in 2nd grade Holly had Mrs W, Cassie Mrs H. 3rd grade Cassie had Mrs W (who looped up to be the extra 3rd grade teacher this year), and Holly had Mrs E. This year I was asked by Mrs W, what I wanted to do next year, since she was again going to loop up. If she had had either of them for both years, she would automatically not have them. But since she had each of them once, if I wanted to I could request she had neither, or both or one or the other. What I told her was she was welcome to both! I told her to do what is best but I would love for either or both of them to be with her, but I would like it if at least one was with her. We'll see what happens!!!