They're frustrated and LOUD. How to cope w/ constant toddler madness?

2 whiny, screaming, crying, yelling, screeching little girls. Every little thing is frustrating and so there is so much LOUDness. I can't stand it. I'm loosing my mind. I'm having headaches and dizziness (which I know is directly related to their constant noise). Even at night, there's moaning, grunting, sometimes crying. I've put away most of the noisemaking toys.

They are at daycare 2 (sometimes 3) times a week which is a HUGE help. But if they are here (which is all the rest of the time), it's NONSTOP noise.

I used to think it was bad when they were babies. But the screaming, whining, etc is so much worse now. I swear. It's louder and more often. Most of the time I'm baffled as to what's wrong (other than they are impatient toddlers).

How can I help them use their words more? They have alot of vocabulary (even though we aren't always sure exactly what they are saying).

How much longer is this going to go on???? Pls. I'm desperate.

Any books, websites, tips, advice is appreciated. gotta go, more screaming is going on and I've gotta rescue DH.

 

I've started "counting" the screaming, whining and badgering. I say "No, you can't have a treat (for instance)" They say "Mom, I want treat!" I say "I said No, That's 1 - if I get to three it's time out" and then keep on counting. I've had a lot more time outs as a result, but I think they'll get the hang of it.

Now, That might not work for Samantha and Sydney as well. When they have a quiet moment I would lavish them with love and praise and tell them how sweet they are being etc. Just REALLY enjoy those times.

When they make me crazy for too long, I end up turning on Mickey Mouse Crackhouse for a few min. of peace!! :hug99:

 

QUOTE(~* dfaut *~ @ Dec 16 2007, 07:22 PM) [snapback]536866[/snapback]
Mickey Mouse Crackhouse

ha ha ha

We have similar issues...imagine that.

Some techniques I employ (more for my sanity than for their well being):

*When they are already worked up, I will start doing something wacky (singing, dancing, chasing, tickling) which usually (temporarily) halts the spine-twitching whine fest.

*I keep us moving to new play areas throughout the house when they start getting bored/antsy/whiny to keep them busy/occuppied. (IE. playroom, bedrooms, backyard, etc.)

*I have them help with chores (hand them a clean rag while I dust, 'find all the socks' when I fold clothes, etc)

*I have some "special occassion" activities that I get out only occassionally (IE. tunnel/playhouse)

Special activities (not for an energy-zap day):
*Finger paining followed by a mid-day bath (or, get the bath tub crayons/paints and combine activities)
*Simple cooking projects (while they 'help' (throw them a spatula and measuring cup) in their high chairs)
*Coloring, stickers, play dough (we're not able to do these yet, but your girls might be better with this sort of thing)

*If they (or I) are just going completely nuts I throw them in the car and run errands or go for a neighborhood walk.

*Last resort (or first resort if I'm sick): Signing Time DVD

 

Ear plugs for you. Lolipops/candy canes for them.

I used to whisper to them. It would work sometimes.

 

QUOTE(~* dfaut *~ @ Dec 16 2007, 07:22 PM) [snapback]536866[/snapback]
Mickey Mouse Crackhouse


I just had to comment on this.... We refer to Yo Gabba Gabba as "baby crack." Even DS1 asks to watch "the baby crack show" :laughing:


How are your girls with drawing? Mine LOVE the magna doodles and both my boys (especially Gabe) will draw and doodle on that for a long time. Makes for some nice peaceful time at our house.

They love baths. So if they are being particularly obnoxious, I will give them a bath. I don't care what time it is. It makes them happy and distracts them. I can just sit on the toilet and close my eyes while they splash and play.

I have a DVR with shows taped (ie: yo gabba gabba, mickey mouse clubhouse, wow wow wubzy are favorites). If I can't stand the noise and crying...on goes the TV. Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do to keep from going crazy!!

Good luck! ((hugs))

 

I'm dealing with this with one of my dd (thankfully it's only one, I can't imagine how aweful with 2! So sorry ) I do find that some of the other suggestions made from pp have also worked for me, namely:

When she gets really loud and starts yelling I will start whispering "What? I can't hear you. What? You're too loud, I can't hear you." Eventually she will lower her voice to try and hear what I'm saying. Also, the distraction/tickle/dancing and singing thing will usually work. If she is yelling "at me" or whining, I will usually walk away saying "I can't listen to you when you are like this. Come talk to me when you are ready to talk nice/with your big girl voice." If you play music or have the tv on for them, lower it. It may help to just keep the general noise in the house down. Most importantly, as hard as it is (and don't get me wrong, I totally screw this one up at times) don't yell at them unless it's an emergency type situation. I find that my getting angry and yelling at them to stop this and that and be quiet is hypocritical and contradictive to what I expect from them. Time outs may also work but you have to pick and choose your battles. I only focus on 1 or 2 behaviors at a time. Once those are under some control then I may move on to another behavior. Perhaps when they start screaming, you warn them to lower their voice and if they don't, put them in timeout. I use my packnplay downstairs for times outs and since I've started them, it has been really really effective. It does however, take several times for them to associate the behavior with the timeout but if you stay consistent then it is very effective. As for the whining, if you cater to it and give in then they find it as a way to get what they want. If you ignore it, they may find that it's not a good method for them.

These are things that have worked for us so far and it may or may not help you but I hope that you find a good solution that works ASAP for your mental health and well being. They can just be so darn trying at times. It's so frustrating.