They were the only twins at a playgroup

We went to a playgroup this morning. It was at a house in the backyard. When I rsvp'd, I foolishly assumed it would be in a fenced backyard.

We get there and no fence. She had a bunch of toddler pools and sprinklers set up. There was about 12 kids but only 6 toddlers, the rest were infants.

I'm constantly watching Jake & Josh. With there being pools, I did not want either of them in there without me close by. As I'm running around, I noticed all the mom's of singleton's just sitting on the patio chatting away while their kids play in the yard.

At one point, Jake was sitting on a patio chair and I noticed Josh putting a giant piece of chalk in his mouth(backyard was not baby proof). I asked the mom's to keep an eye on Jake while I get Josh. Well, Jake falls out of the chair. As I was getting ready to leave, I asked the host if she could watch Jake while I put Josh in the car. I changed them into dry clothes after being in the pool and I come back and Jake is soaking wet. She says "sorrry, he was just too fast for me".

They had a great time but for me it was exhusting.

 

I totally empathize. They just don't get it. We now either host play dates at our house, or hang out mainly with other MoMs or folks with multiple kids who really do get it. I am much less frustrated, exhasted, and cranky when it's over.

 

Nightmare!!
Watching the singleton moms makes me SUPER jealous sometimes!
We do the best we can right? It just can be so hectic though!
I think my singleton mom friends are secretly jealous of twins though...or maybe I am just imagining it!! :laughing: :lol:

 

I haven't done any play dates, unless they are with my really good friends who I can trust to help me with them. Some of them have babies the same age and always tell me they have no idea how I do it with two, because they have a hard time with one. It makes me feel good. They all think I'm supermom, which I never feel like. They say I have it so together and don't seemed stressed. I feel the exact opposite. I feel like I never sit still or get a chance to breathe when we get together. I prefer to have them at my house, but it is nice to get out once in a while. Change of scenery is always a good thing for them.

 

:hug: to you. Sometimes I get totally envious of singleton moms who don't have to decide which toddler is more danger before they decide what direction they have to run in. I have not been brave enough to take the twins to a play date unless it's to my BF's house.

 

I will never forget how hard that age was. :hug: In just a few more months, it will get much better.

 

I take mine to playdates quite regularly, and I feel the same way. If I get to sit down and say 2 sentences to someone it is a miracle!!! I just accept now that if I go to playdates/playgroups at others houses that I am doing it to get myself and the kids out of the house, not for it to be relaxing for me, or to get any adult socializing in.
I was at a playcentre with a bunch of singleton moms yesterday and I was grabbing DD who was falling off the bench and took my eyes off of DS who was right next to two mom's, DS was trying to get between their chairs (there was not enough room, and neither one of them helped him), so he tripped and smacked his chin, cutting his innner lip pretty good, and we was bleeding quite a bit. I mean, honestly he was an inch away from 2 moms, and neither one of them redirected him or helped him...ugh!
I am assuming that one day it will get easier...

 

I can't believe the other moms didn't watch them even when you asked them to! I would have been peeved about that. In the summertime when I'm not working, I attend playgroups every week. So far the other moms, whom I am very close with, help me when I need or ask for help. Most of the time I do not ask for help though. I don't want them to feel burdened by us being there. But I only have one walker so so far it's been fine! We'll see what life is like in a few weeks when Mallory is walking all the time!

 

Yeah, that sucked that no one offered to help and then when you asked they didn't really watch them either. I know it's our responsibility to watch our twins at playdates, not the responsibility of any other moms, but most moms I encounter tend to be pretty helpful when they see me struggling with the twins. I'm actually shocked that a mom without a fenced yard would host an outside playdate and think it was ok! Even if I had just one, I'd be watching them like a hawk in an unfenced yard. Toddlers can toddle away so quickly!

 

QUOTE(seamusnicholas @ Jun 29 2009, 10:05 PM) [snapback]1374800[/snapback]
I will never forget how hard that age was. :hug: In just a few more months, it will get much better.


I was going to say the exact same thing. Last summer was very difficult, but this summer is SO much better. :hug: and maybe next time bring a friend or mother's helper to the playdate.

 

Yup it made me stop going to playgroup because of this. They kept leaving the door open and i kept having to run about after them. I seemed to be the only person running about. Everyone else was just chilling out chatting and drinking tea and there me running about like a loony trying to keep kids attention. Never went back after that

 

a friend of mine is visiting from out of town with her singleton infant and she wants to get together today. i had to explain to her why starbucks would probably not be the best idea with my two twinadoes.

on the bright side, last week when i took the girls to the sprinkler park, there was a mom there with two year old trips and she just kept counting them to make sure they were all still around, so i guess we could have it harder!

 

I'm doing playdates with other twin moms only! "we" are all babyproofed and both on our heals all the time! I joined the local twin moms group and that is where I found them!

 

QUOTE(paulacraft1 @ Jun 30 2009, 01:11 PM) [snapback]1375682[/snapback]
I'm doing playdates with other twin moms only! "we" are all babyproofed and both on our heals all the time! I joined the local twin moms group and that is where I found them!


I belong to a twin's group as well and do playdates once a week. There are 4 mom's and we alternate houses each week.

This group is through meetup.com for sahm's in my area.

If any mother asked me to keep an eye on their child for a second while she ran to the car, bathroom ect., I would do just that. I was just upset that she said "sure...no problem" and then let him run off into the pool. When I was getting Josh in his car seat, I was gone for less than 2 minutes.

QUOTE
Yeah, that sucked that no one offered to help and then when you asked they didn't really watch them either. I know it's our responsibility to watch our twins at playdates, not the responsibility of any other moms,


I was not expecting any of the other mom's to help but if I seen their child sticking chalk in the mouth or in the pool by themselves or running off, I would step in and say "ummm Billy is in the pool, do you want me to get him for you?"

I guess with us being mom's of twins, we understand how we must always keep an eye on them because there are two the same age.

 

Judy, I can sooo relate to your post! I think it's great you got out to a playgroup :hug:.

 

Man, that sounds tough. I thought a play date was just as much for the moms as the kids, but that doesn't sound fun at all.

 

They really do get better, I promise! I was amazed when last spring started and I could be one of "those" moms just sitting on the bench gabbing while her kids were on the playground. No more hovering or chasing! I did sort-of have it easy because Ainsley didn't walk till almost 19 months, so I didn't have to chase two at that stage. I pretty much set up playdates in the summer the same way you described, and I don't have a fenced-in yard either. Our group does really look out for each other's kids though. Sorry it was so difficult! Just keep at it. Bring the stroller, even at someone's back yard. It makes leaving 1000 times easier! You can grab one, buckle him in the stroller and give him some crackers, grab the other, buckle and cracker him, and then pack your stuff.

 

I feel your pain. We encounter this on a weekly basis. Luckily my playgroup has a few moms that help me out as much as they can so sometimes I get lucky and have an extra set of hands.