the question nobody wants to hear

Yesterday I took the babies out for a walk in the stroller. One lady who stopped to admire them asked the usual stuff - how old are they etc. I told her. Then she looked at me and asked me, "Are you pregnant again?"

WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!

Overall I'm in great shape, and I exercise a lot. But I still look pregnant. Even when I suck in my tummy, I look pregnant. When, oh when, do I get my ABS back???!!! (And what are some good exercises to do to speed up the process?)

 

:hug99: Oh the joys of twinskin! Sorry you had to field that question. I assume you just answered it as a "no."

 

My general rule is you NEVER ask a woman if she is pregnant unless there is an actual child coming out of her at that moment.
I still look like I am a few months pregnant on some days.
I am so sorry someone asked you this.

Tiffaney

 

That was pretty darn tactless. I never mention a womans pregnancy unless she mentions it first.

I sometimes get the urge to say, "Well, I can't be nearly as far along as you!" when someone asks if I'm expecting again.

 

Argh how horrible! Well at least she felt stupid when you told her "no." I got my share of comments after my girls were born. I had a pregnant looking belly for a long time. Now I am glad to say, after over a year, that my stomach muscles have finally come back together on their own. It can take a long time, but it can come back together!

 

Agh! I feel for you. I'm so sorry. I was asked when I was due 5 months pp! I was mortified. My figure is just about back to normal, but I have the tummy, too. :cray:

 

QUOTE(Tif3 @ Sep 15 2007, 12:20 PM) [snapback]409115[/snapback]
My general rule is you NEVER ask a woman if she is pregnant unless there is an actual child coming out of her at that moment.


This is my rule too.

:hug99: I'm sorry she said that to you. I don't have the answer to getting a flatter tummy because I still have my twinskin, tucked in, but there, none the less.

 

I posted a similar topic last week called "Still Pregnant?" and 'veggiehead' gave me some inspiration. She said that even though she had the diastasis recti like I do, she just worked out (including ab work) and ate clean (I'm assuming that's what the 'veggiehead' refers to) and she saw great results. I saw her pictures from very late in her pregnancy and she looked AWESOME. So I guess it just takes hard work and dedication. After reading her message I started back on my Couch to 5k and Pilates. I'm excited about getting my body back. Anyone else doing couch to 5k? I really like it.

Anyway, I guess in time, we will deliver our imaginary 3rd babies

 

QUOTE(serranoboys @ Sep 15 2007, 08:19 PM) [snapback]409259[/snapback]
After reading her message I started back on my Couch to 5k and Pilates. I'm excited about getting my body back. Anyone else doing couch to 5k? I really like it.



what is couch to 5k? do tell.....

as for that dreaded question I'm so sorry you were asked!

I remember my mom telling me that a few months after she had my twin brothers the mailman came to the door to deliver a package and asked her, "when are you ever going to have those babies!?" she was so embarrassed she said, "soon!".

Reyna

 

I'm right there with ya -- I have large fibroids that are keeping my diastasis recti from healing -- having surgery at the end of the month to get rid of them and I certainly hope they solve the "preggo" belly problem for me. (it's been 13 mos for goodness sake)

people still make comments, oh well -- I just smile.. no sense making someone feel bad -- their comments were not made to be hurtful.

I will say thay my body changed alot as time went on -- I lost all my preggo weight pretty quickly, but I never got beyond that. at 6 mos I saw the biggest chnage back to normalcy. I hear it takes a full 2 yrs to get everything back to normal with twins.

Teri

 

QUOTE(Tif3 @ Sep 15 2007, 12:20 PM) [snapback]409115[/snapback]
My general rule is you NEVER ask a woman if she is pregnant unless there is an actual child coming out of her at that moment.
I'm taking classes with a woman who is so very obviously pregnant, but she has never mentioned it to me, so I've never even mentioned a baby. We don't speak to each other often and any time we have, we've never talked about babies or anything relative. So, until then, I say NADA....

I'm surprised it was a woman. Men usually ask that awful question. Don't worry....we've all been there. And it's not as if you HAVEN'T had twins! So take pride in that. It would be worse if you hadn't just been pregnant at all!

 

AUGH :angry: I had that shortly after the babies were born (like 2 months later), I went out to eat with family and the waitress went around and got everyone's wine order, looked at my tummy, and SKIPPED ME. :angry: She thought I was pregnant! I wanted to cry! Or smack her.

I'm sorry, that can feel like such a blow. People should seriously know better.

 

OH MY GOSH!! That's horrible!! :hug99:

 

Yuck the dreaded twinskin! I still have it and my twins are almost 15 months! Yikes! :blink: Just remember, you are only 5 months out, don't be so hard on yourself. It takes a long time to retrain that skin without a tummy tuck. :hug99:

 

I also have the same problem, sorry to hear about that tactless woman. I had an emergency section so I was cut up and down and am having a lot of trouble getting back into shape.

 

QUOTE(Her Royal Jennyness @ Sep 15 2007, 04:32 PM) [snapback]409131[/snapback]
I sometimes get the urge to say, "Well, I can't be nearly as far along as you!" when someone asks if I'm expecting again.



LOL! that is brilliant! ha ha!

Well, my non-twin mom friends have said "9 months on, 9 months off" - so in terms of weight gain, I think that is a reasonable goal to shoot for. But if you get twin-skin and the saggy belly, I think we are stuck with that! I still look about 3 months pregnant in some of my skirts and dresses, not in shorts and jeans, though, so take heart. It can be camouflaged! At 4 months I bought some new clothes, now they are all too big for me. My hips definitely retreated back to their former positions (not ALL the way), same with my boobs, so that just leaves a little belly...

 

Oh man! I looked like that for a while too. :blush:

Paul ordered a book recently to add to our library. It is called something like How to Be a Lady and gives responses to various difficult questions you may encounter in life. It's actually a really good book but this reminds me of something I read when I was glancing through it, "A Lady never asks another woman if she is pregnant." I think the woman you ran into needed to read that.

 

Why oh why do strangers think it is ok to ask such personal questions?!! I understand that she didn't mean to be hurtful, but I still think it's bad manners.

 

QUOTE
I sometimes get the urge to say, "Well, I can't be nearly as far along as you!" when someone asks if I'm expecting again.


Ooohhh, I like that! :girl_devil:

I just smiled and said "No" and kept walking.

Sigh, maybe someday I'll have a flatter belly again? Oh well, for these sweet babies, it's worth it!