The pressure to PT

is starting to get to me!!!!!!!! :crazy: :faint: :wacko: :wine:

I really don't believe that my two are ready. But everybody else is the world i.e. the family and close friends thinks that they are. So let me list it out and see what you think!

It's a go:
Don't like to sit down while pooping
In the last few days A will go into a corner to poop and than check to see if you're watching
Will tell me "after" they peed
Diapers are not always "soaked"
If you ask Izak if he pooped he will say yes ... (if you ask aaden if he pooped he will say no even though he did)

It's a no:
Have no problem about sitting in a wet/dirty diaper ... just don't like to sit while doing #2
We put them in undies the other day and it was accident after accident. Didn't want to stop play to go to the potty and didn't tell us they had an accident.
Izak took his diaper off this morning but didn't want to sit on the potty .. he wanted a diaper back on
If you ask them if they want to go potty they say no


So I'm at a loss right now. Not really sure if I should push the issue or give it another month or two. They just really seem tooooo busy to try the potty and just really have short lived interest while we're trying to do the potty.

Really wish there was a potty training service around here!!!! I'd so be buying into that!!! :laughing:

 

We started at 2, and they weren't ready at the time, but caught on. This is what I did: PT them naked. There are going to be lots of accidents and lots of cleaning up in the beginning, but IMO, it's too soon to put them in undies right away - they have no clue what they are and are so used to diapers. When they start exhibiting signs of having to "go" pick them up and put them on the potty.Don't ever ask them if they have to go - just put them there. This worked for us for the beginning stages. Once they got the hang of going on the potty, we put them in undies and taught them how to pull them up and down and how to wipe. GL

 

I didn't sweat it until 34 months. Even then, I wasn't sweating it. I told myself we would try it out, and if it didn't work, so be it-we would try in a few months.

We did the 3 day training method and had great success. I say if you are going to train...then stick with it for a few days. Like everything else, it is going to take time.

And who cares what people say! Annabella is 25 months and I'm hearing from the inlaws of how my sil was trained at such and such an age! Big whoop! You know your kids best, and if they don't seem ready-then maybe they are not. I think we had such great success with the boys is because I never pushed it ever-and they were just ready when they were. Good luck with whatever you decide!

 

I hear ya - the pressure sometimes even by myself - is just silly! We are going to do the 3 day version over Labor Day weekend and see how it goes - if they fight it entirely we will try again later but I do see lots of signs they are ready so I am hopefull this will work, but keeping an open mind if we need to change gears midpoint. I needed a plan and someone to tell me step by step what to do so I bought the Lora Jensen (sp) book so that is what we are going to do - but there are a hundred different methods that I am sure all work - just depends on the kids and you what works best.

I am SO sick of buying diapers!!

 

I totally agree with this! My two were ready to train at different times and they trained two totally different ways. My DD was more relaxed about it and we proceeded through milestones. My DS, the 3 day program did work for him.
Here's a potty training readiness quiz to peek at

 

I don't want to do the 3 day program (I only have one spare sheet for each bed so night PT will have to wait, and I'm not ready to clean pee and poop off my floor) and my kids are still nowhere ready... Their preschool teacher doesn't care, it's my mom who is pestering me. But really, they sit in pee and poop all day, love sitting on their potties but never actually do anything on it and spend more time playing with it than anything else...

But yeah... I'm in no rush to have to get up at night to take them to the toilet (they'd just dump potties), having to stop everywhere for bathrooms when we go somewhere... yeah... no hurry.

 

We did the 3 day method (which was actually the worst 7 days of my life ), but honestly if it weren't for the fact that they needed to be PT for preschool, I would have waited. ardon: They had absolutely no interest before we started, and it took a long time for it to totally click.

So if you really want to say you did it, you can try the 3 day method, or you can tell everyone else to mind their own business.

 

I think you feel the pressure of it most with the first child(ren). Personally, if they don't act ready and there's no real need for them to be ready, I wouldn't push it. I think it can be so stressful, and it's very hard to stay a pleasant mommy when you're dealing with lots of accidents and children who don't seem to care. I had 1 who trained at about 25 months, and one of my twins was almost 3 1/2. The others were in the middle. Spencer is about 25 mo now and NOWHERE near ready. But my friend has a son who will be 2 next month that's PTing and doing great. Best part for her, her 8 year old son is doing most of it, taking him potty and such. On the other hand, her baby hardly talks at all and Spencer's been talking in full sentences for months. Kids just hit different developmental milestones at different times. There's a huge range of normal. It's hard when you're feeling the pressure from other places, but personally, I'd wait. I don't like how stressed I get when we're in the middle of it with a child who isn't quite ready. That's not the mommy I want to be. So I'd keep talking about it some, let them watch Daddy in the bathroom, periodically ask them some if they want to go potty in the potty. But don't push it.

 

I never did a high-pressure PT thing. They were encouraged to use the toilet when they wanted to.

Around age 2.5 we started handing out M&Ms for successful use of the toilet. (Hint: If you take this route, never EVER let them choose the color. I used to dramatically close my eyes when I stuck my hand in the bag, to make it clear that it was just random chance what came out.) We praised them for using it, especially on their request rather than ours, but they stayed in diapers.

A few months before their 3rd birthday we started asking them if they wanted to wear underwear, and if they thought they could keep it dry. Amy said yes at 2y9m, switched to underwear and almost never had an accident. Sarah didn't switch till 3y3m -- she probably could have done it earlier, but was too scared of having accidents.

I just decided I'd rather change diapers for another few months than stress about it. I'm really happy with the way it worked out.

It also helped (from a lack-of-peer-pressure standpoint) that they were among the oldest in their preschool class -- so although they may have trained relatively "late," they were still right in the middle of the pack.

 

I did a haphazard approach for several months ... a couple before 2 yrs and a couple after 2 yrs... I finally made real progress at 27 mo. when I did the 3 day approach. I did the getting rid of diapers totally ... but in retrospect you could probably do that theory for day training and do something else at night... if it doesn't work, then just shelve it and go back to what you're doing. I don't think you'll see a lot of day success until you get rid of diapers for at least a few days to actually catch them in the act and "rush" them to the toilet to finish it off and praise them... that's when mine started getting it.

of course, yep, if you want to tell people to mind their own business, that's always perfect advice for anything! good luck!!!

 

We didn't really give it much thought or effort until the boys were about 3 1/2. Once they started showing interest, we stepped it up and they started going pee-pee pretty regularly although we still had them in diapers. They ABSOLUTELY would not even TRY to go poop in the potty. Around Thanksgiving, we decided it was time and once we were out of diapers, that was it. They fought it at first...but we didn't back down. After putting them in underpants, they have each had two pee accidents during the day and two at night. No poop accidents to date. They turned four early April. I had tons of pressure from certain family members and friends, so I know how you feel. My husband and I stood firm and united that we weren't going to be pressured. After all, WE were the ones changing the diapers, right? So, why is it anyone else's business?? Some children are ready earlier than others, but they WILL do it when they are ready, and no amount of pressure will change that! I'd always heard from all of my friends whose children are now grown, that the longer you wait, the easier it would be. In our case, it was true!! Easy, peasy. Good luck to you

 

I didn't even attempt with any of my 3 boys until they were 3.5 - and it was easy at that point. Honestly, I don't get the pressure/competitive nature that potty-training invokes in people. If you don't think they are ready - or if you just don't even want to attempt to find out - forget about it for a few more months! :hug: