The girls are 5! And a question

Hi!! Ava and Addison turned 5 Jan 3!!! It is SO hard to believe!!!!! They are in pre k this year in separate classes which the school did against my wishes but now I am thinking it may have been for the best. Addison does ok in her own class - but there is a window between the two classrooms so she can see Ava whenever she wants.Ava is not doing as well but does not cry About going to her own class anymore she loves her teacher - but she will not let Addison play with any other kids when the two classrooms get together at recess and will cry if she sees Addison through the window. These two cannot do any thing without the other. They even get upset if the other is not available to accompany her to the bathroom. It is bad! Today Ava is sick and cannot go to school - so Addison is in tears saying she is scared to go to school by herself. Addison loves school. I don't know if it is a normal thing for twins to be so dependent on each other or not. Until this point I have been thinking it was cute that they are so close but now I don't know! I don't want to keep both home from school every time one is sick!! How do you guys handle this?

 

I would send Addison to school. If they were your other kids, would you even consider keeping one home because someone else was sick? They are two different kids, and need to learn that it is OK to be without each other.

 

It's a tough situation when twins are really dependent on each other. I think all you can do is continue to encourage them to develop independence. Addison should go to school when Ava is sick... she might learn that she has an awesome time and it will build her self confidence. When my girls started preschool at age 3, they were nervous when they couldn't see each other, but learned pretty quickly that playing with other kids is fun too. Now at 4.5, they're absolutely best of friends, but usually don't play together at school. Piper prefers to do art projects while Cricket is running around outside. I love that they have each other to rely on, but that they can be individuals too.

To help your girls get over their "togetherness" you might schedule time with just one of them each weekend. For example, take Ava to the grocery store while Addison stays home with her DH or her big brothers/sisters. They'll know the other is safe at home, so it's a controlled way to help them learn that confidence they'll need later in life.

Good luck... and I hope Ava feels better soon!

 

OMG A&A are 5! Happy birthday girls!!! As for their dependence, I agree with Sharon and Tricia. You should continue to encourage them to be independent. Addison should go to school today, but maybe have her bring home "work" for Ava. We did this when Meara was sick in the fall and missed a whole week of school. Ana was very excited to help and bring home work and get well cards from Meara's class. I also agree about trying to schedule some one-on-one time with them (I know that is probably super difficult with a little one in the house!). :hug: I'm sure this is a security thing for them and that is wonderful that they have each other. But they also need to know that its ok to be alone sometimes too.

 

Oh I sent her sweet little upset self!! I think bringing home Ava's work is a great idea - Addison does love to help!! I called and spoke with the receptionist at the school, she is going to ask Ms. Cindy to send something home with Addison for Ava so that will be good! I am hoping that this extreme dependence will get better as they go to kindergarten next year and are at school for a longer day. Right now they only go from 9-12.