Terrible comment about twins from a Baby Depot Rep

Okay - I've been trying to just forget about this and get past it....BUT it's still bothering me, so I need to vent. (sorry it's long)

My DH and I went to Baby Depot (inside Burlington Coat Factory) last Friday to pick up the 2 cribs that we put on Lay-away. After paying...my DH went to move the car to the upstairs parting lot and I took the escalator and agreed to meet up there. As I get there....I see my DH walking towards me UPSET! I asked what was wrong and he STUNNED me. He said the Baby Dept Rep is at the front with the 2 cribs and 2 men that are helping out.....as well as the Greeting store employee (4 employees total). They apparently were commenting and stating that since we were getting 2 cribs it was probably for twins. The Baby Depot Rep. said - "Most twins are born small and a lot of them die." I COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT. My DH was standing close enough to hear them talk - they didn't know he was the buyer of those cribs. My DH told me to just ignore the ignorant comment and to head over so they could load up the cribs and we could leave.
I tried all weekend to forget about it but couldn't. On Monday I called Burlington Coat Factory's customer service number to file a complaint. I gave them the Employee's name that made the comment. I did receive a call from the store manager - telling me she apologized and that Burlington Coat Factory would be sending me a $20.00 gift card. For some reason.....the gift card just seems to add more insult to the situation.
I understand people are entitled to their opinions, but shouldn't the Baby Depot Rep been more discreet with her ignorant comments. She knew the owners of the crib would be showing up at any moment.
Sorry, I just had to vent. But I still don't feel better.

 

OMGoodness, that is just terrible. Im so sorry you had to hear such a HORRIBLE comment from that idiot....I dont understand why some people just dont keep their mouths shut

 

I work with the public in my job and I am always shocked what some people think is acceptable to say out loud in front of complete strangers. Just yesterday someone made one of my employees who serves coffee cry by seeing that she was pregnant and said, "you're pregnant and you work here? good luck with that". This poor girl works her butt off! Anyway...people just suck sometimes! Sorry you had to hear that!

 

Oh dear, and this in pregnancy - I mean, when one is always close to crying (and laughing). He should really be more thoughtfull in his position.

And he´s wrong, anyway!!! Though of course there´s a higher preamturity rate, it´s no guaranty your twins need to be early!!! Don´t let him make you fussy and frightened. I mean, people used to tell me "oh my god, you will need cesarian - they will be early (or smaller), this is ALWAYS with twins, I know somebody... blah blah, all that kind of horrorstories.

And sometimes I really tended to believe there was some truth in it. It´s so sad there are people who like to spoil the unique and precious experience of having twins.

 

that is awful!!! and they should send you 2 giftcards!!

 

She is obviously uneducated and misinformed about twins. The problem is that when places like the media focus their attention on multiples it is not always positive and this woman most likely is gleening her info from sources like that.

It sounds like the store does care and did what they could after the fact. Try not to let someone who does not have their facts straight get under your skin!

 

quote:
Originally posted by Dianne:
She is obviously uneducated and misinformed about twins. The problem is that when places like the media focus their attention on multiples it is not always positive and this woman most likely is gleening her info from sources like that.




EXACTLY! Very good point.

Regardless it is an awful conversation to be having in a public place where PARENTS OF TWINS may be within earshot! Especially when they don't have their facts straight and are just making conversation in order to shock or impress.

So glad you reported it though. People need to be made aware when they act insensitively. The gift card does seem a little distasteful. Almost like saying "Sorry we hurt you, will money make it better?" UGH.

So Sorry the two of you had to experience that.

Lisa

 

OMG!! What a HORRIBLE thing to to say!!! From an employee no less!! And all you got was a $20 GC?? Uggh, I would be extremely upset.

 

I am so sorry that such an ignorant person made such a horrible remark. Please don't take it to heart. Polls have been done many times on this board asking how many weeks your twins were born at and the majority are way towards the end. I had mine at 38 weeks, and they were far from small. And I'm pretty sure they are alive. They did just ask me for something to drink.

If you are still steamed up, write a letter directly to the CEO of the company. Maybe they can make changes and send their employees to some kind of sensitivity training.

 

What a horrible thing!!!!!!!! BUT - Rest assured that if you got a call from the manager and a GC (lame though it was), that employee rec'd QUITE a talking to, perhaps even a suspension or more.

If there's one thing I've learned it's that people are generally stupid. Need proof? If you do a search on this website, you'll find countless posts re: the stupid things people have said about twins. Some are way worse than others, of course, but they just don't know!!!! And you also know from reading the countless success stories on this website that what he said has NO BASIS IN FACT! You're 25 weeks already - the chances are great that you will have normal, healthy babies. So just enjoy this time as best as you can and try not to let one stupid person's comment upset you.

 

people are stupid idiots. ignore this ignorant person. We all know after 28 weeks the babes have a 80-90% survival rate!!!!

 

I would have walked to the nearest cashier and got a return and walke d out, leaving them standing there and wondering why? Or I would have gave them a piece of my mind! People are ignorant! I am sorry you had to go through that....people say rude things all the time and I always come back and say something smart. Most people are jealous, but afraid to admit it, so they say something rude.

I would be placing a call to the top dog!

JMO,

Juli

 

I'm sorry you had to deal with that comment while pregnant. As those of us on this board know, that's just not true and the vast majority of babies are born healthy. Even the ones that need a little NICU time just tend to be grower/feeders or have 1-2 days of breathing help and are out in less than 2 weeks. I'm sorry they made you feel bad, it's difficult to get out of the grumpy slump when someone says something like that to you.

 

Yes, once again we have proof that people are ignorant and STUPID!!!!

As pp's have said - do NOT let this one moron who is NO ONE in your life effect you. You just put your hand on your growing belly and have a conversation with your little ones; tell them how much you love them and how you and their father are looking forward to meeting them. See them in your mind as healthy- and know that even if they do come early, they will likely turn out fine; so many people have stories of their perfectly healthy babies.

Mostly - don't let it eat at you. If you find yourself dwelling on it - change the image in your mind: go someplace that you really love, taht's really calming to you, or imagine yourself in the summer, taking your twins for a walk in the neighborhood.

 

That was heartless - I can't believe it - who says things like that???

 

I would take it higher and complain to the corporate level. Obviously this person does not need to be working in the baby retail business.
Sorry you had to hear that, it isn't true and as you can tell from this board a lot of twins are born healthy!

 

Just popped in (I was intrigued by the post title).
I'm sorry you had to deal with that stupid remark!!!!
When I was pregnant with the twins, I felt like I was a magnet for twin stories -- small twins, large twins, twins that were so alike, twins that were so NOT alike..... The same went for twin birth stories -- I just ignored them and decided that I was doing all I could do (along with the doctor, DH and all my loved ones) to keep the babies healthy and that was enough. I also spent a goodly amount of time telling myself how stupid people were at times.
BTW, my twins are 7 1/2, born @37 weeks, and never looked back!!!

 

When i was pregnant with the boys I didn't have much contact at all with parents of twins (I didn't have a computer at the time), and spent a lot of time in the dark about what to expect. I came across an old school friend who nicely told me that they would probably not make it to birth and if they did they are at high risk of problems.
I have no greater joy than walking past her with my very healthy beautiful boys and knowing what a stupid jealous woman she is. How wrong she was.

 

Stupid, stupid, stupid.....

That's all I have to say about that!

 

Yikes. How completely insensitive and WRONG! It is just amazing to see/hear people's 'observations' on twins.

 

Honestly, I'd be insulted by the $20 Gift Card also! While she may have reasons to explain her comment, it is still 100% inappropriate. She is there to help customers and make their shopping experience enjoyable, not to add her negative commentary to an otherwise exciting trip to her store!

That store manager had an responsibility to earn his customers' respect and trust back, and it sounds like he dropped the ball too. That's too bad.

Sorry for the insensitivity of others I wish I could promise it would be the last insanely insensitive comment you'd hear.

 

Yes, everyone is entitled to their opinion, but when it is completely IGNORANT and has no base in truth, you can totally ignore it and throw it away. It isn't worth a thing!

Don't worry--this person obviously had no clue what they were talking about. Maybe this was the case 300 years ago, but not today.

Enjoy your little ones prospering inside of you!

 

Thank you all for your advise and words of encouragement. I'm definitely doing a lot better now and have slowly put it past me now. Now, I'm looking forward to my first baby shower this weekend.

 

Oh my God, that's terrible of that person to say. I think my honey would have punched him, seriously. What a turd. How insensitive can you be? ANd I hear ya on the gift card, it's like, here, our employees are morons, here's a 20-spot to soothe things over. Now, if it was a $200 gift card, that's a different story ...

Call them up and tell them that that comment got you so upset you began having tons of BH ... say the health of the babies is at risk because that comment got a pregnant woman so upset. See what happens then, morons.