survery question

hi ladies again. I have a question. sorry this might be long. My husband and I have been discussing this issue since I have been pregnant with twins.
we have a small cape and only two bedrooms upstairs.. we found out we were having twins so we decided to move our bedroom downstairs and get rid of my dining room. I have my 3yr old upstairs and the new ones when they come upstairs as well. I wanted to leave a bed in the babies room because I felt safer that way.. He said this is what monitors are for.. sleep downstairs and go up when you hear them. I feel like you need to be right beside them when they are infants.. I was with my daughter and I also breastfed as well I am not sure If I am with twins yet. HE seems to think I am crazy and everyone else does what he says.. which is sleep downstairs and leave the kids upstairs. I am a nervous nelly mommma and feel as though I need to be in arms reach of my kids.
so he said do a survery online and see what you get.
what do you think and what are your sleeping arrangnments?

 

I think having a bed in their bedroom is a good idea, especially when they are really young...or, if you have some room in your new bedroom on the 1st floor could you fit a crib in their and co-sleep them for the first couple of mos. so they are close to you? I just think that when you first get them home you are going to want to be near them to keep an eye on them and it will also be easier to feed them. Also, if you have a c-section I believe you aren't supposed to do stairs for a little while, although don't quote me on that b/c this is my first pregnancy....my friend who just had a c-section slept on her couch in the living room with the baby in a bassinet for the first month.

 

I don't think having the babies in a different room is so bad -- we did that with my daughter, and it was fine. BUT, the room was right next to ours, not on a different floor. And, when she had her days and nights mixed up when she was really young, I ended up sleeping in the glider rocker in the nursery a few nights, because she was waking up every two minutes...

I also agree with the pp, if you have a c-section, you probably *can't* run up the stairs all night to feed the kiddos. Even without a c-section, you will be tired!

So, while I wouldn't worry about not being right next to the babies, I think sleeping on another floor will be very hard on you...I think putting a bed in the nursery for a few weeks or months is a good idea.

 

We changed our sleeping arrangements many times with our first little boy. In our room, next to the bed, in the bed, in a changing room area next to our room, in his room.... they all worked while we tried to figure out what he and we needed. Right now we have two cribs in our room. One is snugged up to our bed like a cosleeper. We also left the double bed in the room that will be theirs. I had many friends who were more familiar with raising babies and they kept a bed in the babies room for a parent to sleep in when mama was breastfeeding or when they were having sleeping issues. I have slept in a rocker too many times and what I would have done to have a bed in our first born's room when he was not sleeping through the night. My neck ached and I would have felt so much better if I could have layed down while signing softly to him.

My two cents s keep your opions open and keep the bed in the room that will be for the babies. You need to be very flexible.

Mj

 

I think that in the beginning, you are definately going to want those babies as close as possible. Running up and down stairs all night, does not sound like fun to me! I put my 2 in a regular size crib, right next to my bed. And in the beginning, they were in bed with me a lot. It is hard enough to get up with both babies when they are right next to you, it would be torture to run up and down stairs all night!

 

i wish I placed a bet with him because I am winning!
I feel the same way.. Although I made a big mistake with my first where this discussion started with my husband and I. I nursed her and like you all said you are tired and end up falling asleep either in the next bedroom with a basinet by your side or I kept a full side bed in her room with teh bassinet and when I nursed her we fell asleep together and since then she has been sleeping with me since. she is 3 1/2.
we argue about this all the time he doesnt want me to make the same mistake twice.
I am just such a wimp when it comes to her needing me for comfort that I cave in. I just cant help it.. I am a strict mom when it comes to other stuff but ignoring her when she wants comfort or love is hard for me to turn away.
our friends wonder how we got pregnant this time because we do not sleept together... LOL.
thanks for your replies!

 

I don't know what the statistics are, but my pediatrician says that you should room in with your newborn(s) until they are 6 months old, due to sids. With my son, we had his crib in our room, I also breastfed and that made it much easier than getting up and going into a differant room several times a night, especially in the beginning. Plus, being a "nervous nelly" mom, like yourself, I wouldn't be able to sleep if my baby(ies) were in another room. We have a playpen with the bassinet in our room now for when our girls arrive. Good luck with your decision!

 

My plain and simple answer: babies in same room as you, especially if you decide to breastfeed. We are going to put ours in a co-sleeper next to our bed.

 

Mine were in our bedroom in the same crib. It was much easier to feed them in the middle of the night. Also, like pp mentioned, it's suppose to help reduce sids.

Good luck!
thea
misha and cyan 15 months old

 

It sounds to me like your dh just wants his wife back in his bed minus children! There is a compromise! Put a crib in your bedroom. Tell dh that you will work really hard with his help at having the babies sleep in the crib, not the bed. This means he'll probably have to help you, but will ulitmately get him what he wants. Once they are sleeping pretty consistently, only waking to eat once or twice, you can move them upstairs. Ours were sleeping through at 3mos so if you work at it they can be sleeping well and upstairs by 6mos or so. We had all of our children in our bedroom until they slept through, the twins stayed for the whole first year because we had nowhere else to put them! We've since moved. GL!

 

Both of my singletons were breastfed and in the room with me (if not in the bed!) for at least 4 months. At that point they were still waking up once a night, but I went to them or brought them to my bed to nurse.

 

With both the twins and Liam, we have kept the babies in the same room as us in the beginning. Liam is still in with us and I think the twins were until about 3 months (and we live in a ranch, so their room is right next to ours).

 

With both of my singletons I kept each in a bassinet next to the bed for the first 4 months. The idea of a crib for them to sleep together in in your room sounds good too. I have had 2 c-sections and believe me steps are a big no-no for a least a week. Even after that it is very uncomfortable walking up and down steps. Doing that several times a night would be miserable for you. Good luck bringing hubby to your side!

 

Ours will be in a portable crib right next to my bed. My hubby and I slept much better having our son in our room with us so we will continue this practice with these little ones

 

YOu definatly want your kids in the same room as you in the beginning regardless of whether you breast or formula feed. they wake every few hours and you would be running up and down teh stairs all night long. Its not fun so keep them with you, whether its you upstairs with them or them downstairs with you

 

All parents are different. I can tell you this, being an experienced mom of twins... when they are a few months old and less... it is much EASIER to have them in your room. Because with twins, they are up and down ALL hours of the night, and if they were in their own room, you would be in and out, constantly. So, if you have them upstairs and you are downstairs, you will be climbing stairs ALL night long. You will be exhausted.

 

I think having a bed in there is a great idea. There are definately going to be nights when he's GLAD you've got a bed there so you won't bother him getting up and down. If/when you feel comfortable sleeping on the first floor, I'm confident you will...until then, there's nothing better than being near them when they're peaceful and asleep