Stroller Frustration

Ok, so I have told my mother OVER and OVER that I really want the double snap-n-go and then a side by side stroller once they are too big for that. We have a relatively small car and i have taken measurements of most of the double strollers including the duoglider, snap-n-go, and various side by sides. The opening for my car will accept 33" in lenght MAX and then it will be tight. Not to mention that it weighs over 30 lbs! I have said this SEVERAL TIMES. The Duoglider according to the manufacturer is 35" long when folded. Too big for our car... She just called me and told me that one of our close family friends wanted to get me something so she said oh, I have a friend selling a double stroller (the duoglider) why don't you get that? WHAT! I would rather she had said get her a gift card to Babies R Us for that amount or had told her that we are registered there and then she could have chosen something from the list. I am really not trying to be picky, but as it is I am not sure 3 carseats are going to fit in our car and now we have a stroller that won't fit either!!! We can't afford a new car, as I have said in other posts we can't afford our basic utilities...

Then, I finally found a person willing to sell me a swing for a reasonable price but she is 2 hours away... my mother's response.... Why don't you just buy a new one!!!! WHAT!! What part of we can't afford our mortgage, car payments, food, electricity and heat do you not get!!!! I have explained this to her told her how bad things are financially, and her response has only been, well we don't feel comfortable paying your bills, but we can try buying some things you need. I have NEVER asked my parents for money and when I told her what things were like I wasn't expecting her to pay, I just needed to talk to someone about it. Then when it comes to buying things I "need" of course it is on her terms like she just bought 2 excersaucers from a friend of hers for us... Very nice, I loved having one with my daughter, but this is not something I need until they are at least 6 months right. I was thinking a crib would be more of a need.

I am sorry, I feel like I am always frustrated. It's just that I feel like I am running out of time! We don't have anything ready for babies at all! Seriously, if you walked into our house you would NEVER know that we are going to be having 1 baby let alone 2! At least we have carseats so we can bring them home! And like I said in another post, since we basically only got clothes for our shower we have things for them to wear.

 

wow i wonder why your mom is being so difficult about this. is this the way she is normally? are you sure she doesn't have some big surprise waiting? has she been to your house? maybe when you get the duoglider you should ask her to come over to help you, and then let her see for herself how it doesn't fit in the car.

 

QUOTE(tgbmomofthree @ Sep 12 2007, 12:28 PM) [snapback]404487[/snapback]
wow i wonder why your mom is being so difficult about this. is this the way she is normally? are you sure she doesn't have some big surprise waiting? has she been to your house? maybe when you get the duoglider you should ask her to come over to help you, and then let her see for herself how it doesn't fit in the car.


I really don't think that she has any surprises waiting. I think that she really thinks that I am exagerating our financial situation. I don't see how she could since my husband took a 20% pay cut when we moved back to Maine from RI and I have for the first time in my life not been able to get a job. I think that she honestly believes that the cost of living here is so much less that this money thing is not real, but the only thing that is less is our mortgage and that is only 400.00 less. Come to find out it looks like the previous owners of our house lied about how much heating oil they used since they said they spent 3000.00 per year and we have spent more since we closed on the house on February 28th (only 6 months).

She was at my house 2 days ago, and apparently the fact that there is nothing baby in it really didn't strike her as odd. Although she probably wouldn't say anyway.

I am definately going to take your suggestion about having her try the stroller in the car, maybe then she will start to figure out that I am not exagerating.

Thanks for the help. I feel like I am always venting about something on here, but I also feel like maybe the only people who get it are others who have or are expecting twins...

 

I'm sorry, that really sucks. I would take the Duoglider and sell it. I just sold ours on craigslist. Once I had twins I vowed to never buy another baby gift that was not on a registry again. There are registries for a reason and as "cute" as clothes are, clothes don't make babylife easier. Flat out tell your Mom again that you need a crib and you need a Snap and Go.

 

QUOTE(NatalieK @ Sep 12 2007, 01:07 PM) [snapback]404574[/snapback]
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I would take the Duoglider and sell it. I just sold ours on craigslist. Once I had twins I vowed to never buy another baby gift that was not on a registry again. There are registries for a reason and as "cute" as clothes are, clothes don't make babylife easier. Flat out tell your Mom again that you need a crib and you need a Snap and Go.


I have been thinking the same thing about selling the duoglider. The thing that kills me about the registry thing is that I don't even think that she told people where I was registered. I even gave her tose insert things, but since there were only 4 things purchased off my registry I can only imagine that people didn't know.

Just out of curiosity, how much do you think I should ask for the duoglider? I haven't seen it yet so I have no idea as to the condition.

Thanks!

 

Well it depends on the condition. I've seen older ones go for as low as $35. Mine was only 2 years old but in great condition so I sold it for $85. Mine was also in a popular print (the Blackwell) so I knew I could sell it for that much.

 

I'm sorry that your mom is being so difficult and that you have so much going on during your pregnancy. I too would sell the duoglider online-if you go to craig's list you can see what other's are asking for the same of similar products.
Also-here is a link to the national mother's of twins club -maybe there is one in your area and from what I have heard they are always willing to help and they sell (possibly donate?-I'm not sure) items you may need...it might be worth looking into. I know someone in Boston that attends this group and she is very happy with them. Good luck!

http://www.nomotc.org

 

QUOTE(dr802 @ Sep 12 2007, 01:28 PM) [snapback]404632[/snapback]
I'm sorry that your mom is being so difficult and that you have so much going on during your pregnancy. I too would sell the duoglider online-if you go to craig's list you can see what other's are asking for the same of similar products.
Also-here is a link to the national mother's of twins club -maybe there is one in your area and from what I have heard they are always willing to help and they sell (possibly donate?-I'm not sure) items you may need...it might be worth looking into. I know someone in Boston that attends this group and she is very happy with them. Good luck!

http://www.nomotc.org



Thanks! I have just found the MOM club in Maine, and although it is about 45 minutes from my house I am still going to try joining. I think even if I can only go to 1/2 of the meetings at least I might get to meet twin moms around here. I know I can't be the only one who is going through similar frustrations and difficulties. I have to believe that it will work out and it will get better, but there are days that it seems like the poeple who should be working with me are working against me.

 

QUOTE(Stephanie1074 @ Sep 12 2007, 02:19 PM) [snapback]404726[/snapback]
Thanks! I have just found the MOM club in Maine, and although it is about 45 minutes from my house I am still going to try joining. I think even if I can only go to 1/2 of the meetings at least I might get to meet twin moms around here. I know I can't be the only one who is going through similar frustrations and difficulties. I have to believe that it will work out and it will get better, but there are days that it seems like the poeple who should be working with me are working against me.



I am glad that you found one that you can get to! Good luck with everything! I hope the group helps you out!

 

HUGS..moms can be so difficult sometimes...

 

I'm so sorry that you are dealing with this ... we got pregnant through IVF, so although I knew twins were a possibility I don't think I was prepared for the financial hit! And they are our first kids, so I guess I was just naive as to how much kids cost.

If it looks like you will be getttng a lot of the stuff yourself definitely check out craigslist or ebay ... i know i am planning on selling my snap and go once my kids grow out of it ... same with the infant car seats since we aren't planning anymore. I feel like I need to try and recoup some of hte cost we spent! A lot of infant things will probably be in relatively good shape since most can't be used for all that long.

Good luck!

 

I'm so sorry for your situation. You gotta love your mom but sometimes they can make you crazy.
Anyway, I don't know if you would be interested, but I have my son's crib from 10 yrs ago (haven't checked on recalls or any of that) and my mom and MIL got 2 brand spankin new cribs (daddy didn't want the crib from my ex's family), so if you want it, I would love to send you my older one. It's white and kinda simple, plus I have a bedding set that is winnie the pooh that I'm not going to use, but no mattress. If your interested e-mail me @ [email protected] and I can give you specs, pics, and check to see if there have been any recalls on it (which would be good, then we could get you a new on or a credit to use somewhere).
I am sending a BIG :hug99: !

 

samiam gives me a good idea. why don't you post what you need on the parents club board to see if anyone who has older twins needs to give away anything on your list. of course to make it worth it, they'd need to be fairly close to you or be able to ship inexpensively, but it might be a way to get what you need.

 

Thank you all for your kind offers and support! I appreciate everyone's kindness.

 

just a thought....the measurement on the DuoGlider is probably with the canopy attached - it is removable as I had to remove mine to fit in the trunk of my car...and I had a Ford Focus (and a Saturn Ion) and it fit in both of those cars....

 

Our MOMs club adopts 2 families in need each year for Christmas and donate the items them need. We also have a donation box and twice yearly garage sales where many moms afterwards donate the things that didn't sell. I would definitely talk to the new members leader for your local club and see if they have anything in place to help families with multiples who need it.

With the Duoglider, it may still fit in your car. I don't know if the folded measurement includes the sunshade on the front seat but, if it does, you should be able to take the sunshade off and that will save a few inches. If it does fit then you won't need the sbs stroller later on and will actually end up saving money on strollers.

 

I know this has nothing to do with strollers... But sign up for WIC now.. when the babies are born they will give you formula.. That is the big cost other than diapers.. If you have questions.. PM me..

 

QUOTE(AshleyLD @ Sep 17 2007, 11:32 AM) [snapback]411239[/snapback]
I know this has nothing to do with strollers... But sign up for WIC now.. when the babies are born they will give you formula.. That is the big cost other than diapers.. If you have questions.. PM me..


Thanks for the advice. I have been putting this off for a while and I think that I definately need to do this. I am planning on breastfeeding as I did with my first, but any help they can offer will be help that we need!

 

QUOTE(Ali M @ Sep 16 2007, 11:10 PM) [snapback]410720[/snapback]
Our MOMs club adopts 2 families in need each year for Christmas and donate the items them need. We also have a donation box and twice yearly garage sales where many moms afterwards donate the things that didn't sell. I would definitely talk to the new members leader for your local club and see if they have anything in place to help families with multiples who need it.

With the Duoglider, it may still fit in your car. I don't know if the folded measurement includes the sunshade on the front seat but, if it does, you should be able to take the sunshade off and that will save a few inches. If it does fit then you won't need the sbs stroller later on and will actually end up saving money on strollers.


Thank you for the recmmendation. I will definately take that advice! I really hadn't even considered Chirstmas or any of that yet!!

We now have an even bigger concern than if the stroller will fit. We got our carseats today and they don't fit in our car with our daughter's seat!!! I had kind of thought that this might happen, but I had been in denial. Now, I have no clue what to do!

Thank you again for your suggestions, I will definately be taking your advice!