strangers staring and questions

After my appointment last week I was going to try to stay at home and in bed as much as possible. That lasted about a day and I was too bored. The doctor said there was no need to limit my activity so I figure I might as well go out with DH and my family while I can. So last weekend we went out to eat and went shopping, doing regular things and I noticed people staring at me everywhere we went! Also, everywhere we go now everyone comes over and talks to me about my pregnancy and asks me several questions like "How many babies are you having?" "When are you due" "What are you naming them?" etc.......I really don't mind the questions, I like that a lot better than just staring at me. Then if I tell them I'm due November 16 they give me a look like "yeah right" and if I say it's twins I hear "you're lucky you're not on bedrest" or weird stories like about a set of twins they know that are really bad or that were born with birth defects, etc......

Last night I was trying to have dinner with my parents, and it seemed like every time one of us would start talking and really get into a story, someone would come up to our table and interrupt to talk about my belly and how big it is, to give name suggestions, or to rub my belly, etc.

People are so brave, if I was in a resturaunt and saw a pregnant woman eating with her family I would never think to go up to her and rub her belly and make name suggestions!!! I know my belly is big, but I don't think it is THAT big, haven't these people seen a pregnant woman before?

I guess I should get used to it since I've read that once your twins are here strangers always ask about them, right?

 

I used to love the looks I got when people asked me when I was due. I remember being out Christmas shopping and someone congratulating me and asking me my due date (thinking it was any day), when I said March 4, the shock on their faces was priceless. Anyway, yes, you do get a lot of comments. And it's great that you can still get around and do things (I was the same way). And yes, you will get a lot of them when you are out with the twins. I just learned to smile and acknowledge peoples comments and move along.

 

QUOTE(PgTimesTwo @ Oct 12 2007, 08:01 AM) [snapback]447037[/snapback]
I know my belly is big, but I don't think it is THAT big, haven't these people seen a pregnant woman before?

I guess I should get used to it since I've read that once your twins are here strangers always ask about them, right?


You mean you are not the only pregnant woman walking around? :laughing: People do crazy things sometimes.

But yes, you once your twins arrive you won't be able to go anywhere without someone stopping you.

Good for you for getting out.

 

I don't mind the "when are you due?" But don't ask me what I'm naming my babies...lol..I'm sorry, that's really none of your business. That question drives me crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I dont get out and about much, but when I do I get stared at. lol.
A few people, like shop assistants ask me when I am due and such but I have NEVER had anyone just approach me out of the blue. Maybe I dont look very friendly!!!!

 

I told my hubby yesterday that he needs to start coming out with me to run errands to see the looks I get and the questions people ask me.
Yesterday was the worst though - I was checking out at the grocery store and the cashier asks me 'Are you having your baby today?' I kid you not! She really said that to me. <_< I don't mind people asking when I am due and stuff like that, but am I having the baby today??? for goodness sake!

 

oh I was just telling someone the other day that the honeymoon of no one asking me about babies was over. No one dares touch my belly but I get my fair share of comments. One woman asked me when I was due, since I didn’t feel like explaining c-section date I said December 1. The look of shock on the woman’s face was unmistakable (I was out to diner with my mom who also noticed and said tell her the rest honey ((Thanks MOM!!)) So I sighed and said “it’s twins” the woman replied “oh I thought you looked gigantic for just one.” I just laugh it all off.

 

I totally know what you mean. When I go out places I feel like people are looking at me like I'm an alien or something. I swear I always tell my husband haven't people ever seen a pregnant person before. People can be so rude. The other day I walked into the hospital lobby and some guy was like "Damn girl you are about to pop." I just said yep and kept on walking. I just can't believe what some people say and do, I would never act like that.

 

Get used to it now, because they just keep coming after you have them.

The week before the boys were born, we all went to Target to purchase some last minute items. As I was walking from the baby aisle over to where DH and DS1 were, this woman gawks at me and then as she's walking away says, "Doesn't she know she could have that baby right here in the store? How disgusting!"

I said, "brings new meaning to the phrase, clean up on aisle seven, huh?"

 

What make's people thing it is ok to rub your belly when you are pregnant? I truly hate that when people come up to me and they start to put there hand on my belly, I walk away and say please don't do that, would you like it if I cam up and grouped you every waking moment, Sorry had to vent and so this posting and thought it was a good place.

 

QUOTE(Domsmomkandiss @ Oct 12 2007, 09:15 PM) [snapback]448347[/snapback]
What make's people thing it is ok to rub your belly when you are pregnant? I truly hate that when people come up to me and they start to put there hand on my belly, I walk away and say please don't do that, would you like it if I cam up and grouped you every waking moment, Sorry had to vent and so this posting and thought it was a good place.

i actually love that, I must be an attention whore, haha. I like all the attention, the staring, the silly questions, the looks of shock and awe when I tell people I am having twins. The only thing I have a problem with is unsolicited advice about how you can/cannot get twins on a schedule, how you can/cannot exclusively breast feed twins, how you should/shouldn't defintely expect a c-section with twins, etc. If I have questions about how to raise/have my babies I will ask, otherwise, nooo thanks

 

Last night me, my SIL and MIL were in a Walmart, it was late and after I'd walked around for a while I decided I was actually gonna go get one of the scooters. My back was killing me, so there I am driving one of the scooters and my MIL stops to talk to someone she knows and they have their little 2 month old baby with them. They had just gotten done getting her ears pierced.......anyway, the mom looks at me, asks me when I'm due, etc. Shocked expressions and all. I always wait a beat to see if they'll ask if I'm having more than one. Anyway, I tell her we're having twins and apparently she just assumes that I will be having a c-section. She immediately starts explaining that it's not horrible after all (she had PIH and had the babe 1 month early) and that she loved it. She then proceeds to lift up her shirt, push down her pants and show me her scar! :lol: And she had to lift up all that loose skin and I could actually see her pubic hairs!!!!!!!
I'm sorry, not that we don't all have hair but WOW! I was amazed, I didn't know her at all.
Not along the same subject as people just having to touch you, I got plenty of that last night too. But I had to tell about this mom.

 

The twin fascination will never change--it will follow your babies through their entire lives. To this day, when people find out I am a twin, they want to talk about it. And now that I am expecting twins of my own...

Well, I just settle in for a long conversation.

 

I have not gotten too many comments yet, except for when I tell my friends that the babies are currently weighing 2lbs, they say, "You've got to put more weight on them!" I just say, "Don't worry, they will get that weight soon!"

But the funny thing is that DH anytime we are out and he sees parents with two kids who look like they are the same age, I almost have to stop him from asking the parents if their kids are twins.

 

When I was at work (I worked until the day before I was induced at 38 weeks 1day) a girl walked by me and asked how I keep from falling over?

I was discussing this question with another coworker who was getting as mad as I was and our boss walked by and had a nice conversation with the "offender" I was just shocked that someone could actually ask that question!

 

QUOTE(Mama Bear @ Oct 12 2007, 07:51 PM) [snapback]448192[/snapback]
I was checking out at the grocery store and the cashier asks me 'Are you having your baby today?' I kid you not! She really said that to me. <_< I don't mind people asking when I am due and stuff like that, but am I having the baby today??? for goodness sake!


That is cracking me up, LOL!

Okay I went with my aunt to buy a dress to wear to my shower, and one of the sales women said "You look like you are about ready to drop a load".......it was all we could do to stop from laughing right to her face! "dropping a load" sounds to me like something other than having a baby! LOL

 

I get this too.... In fact, my mom and I went into a store shopping yesterday mainly to get out of the house... Anyway, we walked into this store and the lady at the desk said "If you go into labor in here I am not going to help you you will have to get her too (pointing at my mom)" then last week after my doctor's appointment my husband and I went into IHOP for breakfast and the lady went to seat us and was like... "hey, are you gonig to fit in this booth?" Kind of a little rude if you ask me!!! I try to just realize that most people in our society lack any tact, common sense or just manners in general!

My personal favorite is when people find out there are twins and they tell you they feel bad for you!

Have these people never seen Bambi... "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all!"

 

don't feel too badly... I went on our hospital tour last weekend...and I saw this other pg lady and I would have bet money that she was pg with twins. I'm soooooo glad I didn't say anything b/c she was not!! She was due in a few weeks...but her belly was just soooooo huge. Just start telling every stranger that you are carrying quads!! Then you'll get compliments on how small you are! LOL!

 

QUOTE(Susanna+3 @ Oct 14 2007, 09:05 PM) [snapback]450434[/snapback]
don't feel too badly... I went on our hospital tour last weekend...and I saw this other pg lady and I would have bet money that she was pg with twins. I'm soooooo glad I didn't say anything b/c she was not!! She was due in a few weeks...but her belly was just soooooo huge. Just start telling every stranger that you are carrying quads!! Then you'll get compliments on how small you are! LOL!



Okay what else is weird is when a stranger says "You're huge!" so I say "I'm having twins" and then their response is "Oh you are small for twins" .....???

 

my favorite comment lately is from another woman who has had twins....she says that my belly is huge and then proceeded to add that she hopes at least that she never looked that big anyway! I was so irritated but I just never think fast enough to say anything because I am so shocked that people are totally ok making comments like that.

I also get the shocked looks at when I am due but then hear "you are so small for twins." I always say thanks but it does not feel so small....UGH!

 

When people ask when I am due-I have learned to say I am due in Januray with twins, that way I avoid anything too akward...but then come the personal questions like, do they run in your family, are they identical, do you know the sex, what are you naming them...I dont mind the attention-YET! I am quite sure this is my last pregnancy so I am trying to enjoy every aspect of it. We are special moms and people just want to know about us!

 

QUOTE(Twinsylvania April @ Oct 12 2007, 07:54 PM) [snapback]448415[/snapback]
i actually love that, I must be an attention whore, haha. I like all the attention, the staring, the silly questions, the looks of shock and awe when I tell people I am having twins. The only thing I have a problem with is unsolicited advice about how you can/cannot get twins on a schedule, how you can/cannot exclusively breast feed twins, how you should/shouldn't defintely expect a c-section with twins, etc. If I have questions about how to raise/have my babies I will ask, otherwise, nooo thanks



YEAH ME TOO. I ACTUALLY ENJOY ALL THAT ATENTION ALSO.I DON'T MIND THE TOUCHING OR THE QUESTIONS. I AM STILL IN AWE THAT TWO BABIES ARE INSIDE ME AND I AM STILL SO SMALL. PEOPLE ARE CURIOUS AND I GUESS I AM OK BEING THE CAGED MONKEY. IT IS JUST THE NAMING THING. WHY WOULD I WANT A COMPLETE STRANGER TO NAME MY BABY. I DON'T MIND TELLING THEM WHAT THE NAMES ARE GOING TO BE. THEY JUST NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT THE NAMES ARE CHOSEN. PERIOD. PLEASE DON'T SUGGEST NAMES OR TELL ME HORROR STORIES.

 

I've had one person (who I knew) touch my belly without asking and one guy who asked first (i also knew) and that has been it. I'm living in Brisbane Australia and people tend to keep to themselves but it makes it hard to meet people here. I went to a prenatal class for multiples and got asked the question around the room "where you surprised ?" ---- well since I did IVF but don't feel like that is anyone else's business, and since we put back two embies and my Beta was well over 4,000 I really wasnt' surprised I was actually relieved. So I found it a weird question to ask unless you are secretly asking .... are they from fertility treatment ????

Heather