Still won't lift up his head!

So my son is 3 1/2 months old and still can not lift up his head while he is on his stomach. My daugther has been pushing up with her hands and holding her head high for about 2 months now. Mayson just cries and finally lays his head completely down after a few minutes of being on his stomach. He has even devloped a flat spot on the back of his head. We have ordered daycare to put him on his stomach anytime he is awake and we are doing the same at home at night. In fact we have even started letting him sleep on his stomach at night (which I know is a huge no-no, but we still have their heart/apnea monitors). Anyway, I guess I am just wanting to hear from someone who had a child that held their head up late and there wasn't anything seriously wrong. My mom even told me yesterday that my dad think that there is something wrong with Mayson because he is so far behind Shelby. He actually has hit all his other milestones and is actually "talking" and smiling more than Shelby. It is so hard not to worry being a mommy, isn't it?

 

I could have written your same post, except that my DD was behind in the physical milestones compared to DS. It took DD a lot longer to gain good head control. She hated tummy time, and I don't think that she finally got to where she could hold her head at 90 degrees until after 4 months. By that time DS was doing "push ups." He rolled over at 4 and a half moths, and it was close to 6 months before she was rolling back and forth, and he crawled at 6 months, she didn't crawl until about 10 months. But DD "talked" first, smiled first, laughed first, and started copy catting gestures and sounds first. It is SOOO hard, but you really can't compare them. It is so hard not to, think to yourself, if Mayson was a singleton, would you be worried, if you still are then talk to the pedi. There is physical therapy for babies that the pedi may recommend IF NEEDED, but he can probably help to set your mind at ease. You should be having a check up in a few weeks, so that would be a great time to talk about your concerns. But it seems to me you've got one that is on the front end of the milestones and one at the later end, just like us. Good luck!

 

Allison did the same thing for the longest time. What worked for us was the Bumbos. She hated it but it really helped. Whenever I would put her on her belly she would just burry her head in the blanket and scream - in the Bumbo she would still scream but her face would be out. Eventually she got it!

 

Ben still had trouble lifting up his head at that age. I think more than anything, he just REALLY hated being on his belly. He would just bury his head in the floor and cry. I started holding on my lap more to try to strengthen his neck muscles and upped the tummy time even though he hated it. It seemed to work! He was rolling over at 4mo and is now incredibly active and has very strong neck/back muscles.

Try not too worry! So much will change in the next couple of months you won't believe it. Also, it sounds like your daughter is very early with these skills, so even if you were going to compare, she's probably not the best comparison.

 

I know how you feel, the girls are about 6-8 weeks behind on motor skills and I worry about everything until they get it. One DD held her head really high and for quite a long time at 4 months, and the other didn't until 6 months and now she is a champ with it.
Try not to let others make you crazy--my MIL asked my DH yesterday if the doctor was worried because the girls weren't sitting up yet. I don't think people get that twins are usually preemies, and anyway all babies develop at different rates.

 

My kids all hated tummy time as well, which is what they need to strengthen those neck muscles. Have you tried propping him up with a boppy or blanket rolled up underneath, so that he is not just staring at the ground? Laying him on your stomach, when you are laying on your back? Do you have an exersaucer...I know he is young, but my kids started going in it around 3.5 months, and I would prop them with blankets so that they weren't flopping around. It would help strengthen his neck muscles as well. As far as the flat spot, make sure that when you lay him down to sleep, he is not laying on that side. A good way to do this is to roll up a blanket and put it under their shoulder, so it forces them to lay on the other side. I would mention it to your ped at your 4 month check-up. :hug99:

 

my sons didn't like belly time too much in the beginning so I put a mirror on the floor in front of them and let them look at themselves. it really helped them want to life their heads up. Once they worked the muscles, it became much eaiser. You can lift his head for him as well so that it works the muscles. EI can be a help with this if you're so inclined to get an eval.

Good luck

Teri D

 

Oh NO! Now you've gotten me worried. I try not to pay too much attention to milestones and stuff...don't want to make myself too paranoid. My don't care for tummy time either. My DD has reflux and will almost always spit up when on her tummy so I hesitate putting her so, and my DS just lays there and doesn't do much of anything. DS has great head control when your holding him, DD not as much. I guess I should heed some of the suggestions listed above and get crackin. We have been putting them in their bumbos for a minute or two a day...they don't like that either!

But anyways, mine only lift their heads some, and def aren't pushing up at all..oh dear!

 

tummy time is more like torture time around here! they HATE it!!! so we rarely do it - Addison is much better with her head than Ava - Ava holds her head up fine when upright but during tummy time acts like she is going to suffocate!?

 

Thanks for the reassurance. He does great if we sit him upright and he will sit in his Bumbo for long periods of time. We have a tummy time mat which has the little cusion for them to lay on. He will try to lift his head for a couple of minutes and then just give up. I think it does get a little better each day, so I guess we are making small progress. It is so hard not to compare the two of them when they are both in front of me. Mayson has had quite a few medicial issues that Shelby didn't experience (PDA valve closed. hernia surgery, oxygen, etc.) My husband keeps telling me that he is just behind because he had a hard start to life. It just always makes me worry something more serious is going on with him.