Still No Schedule...Help!

The girls are still running the show in my house and it's really starting to get to me and them for that matter. Everyday is so different that it's hard to adhere to a schedule. Some days they are tired at 6 p.m. and others 6:30-7...they wake up anywhere between 6-7. Also, some days they eat every 3 hours and then others they are hungry at 2 or 4 hours. I just don't know what to do with them anymore and lately their napping is going down the tubes and I think it's because they aren't on any schedule. Can anyone offer some insight? What am I doing wrong? Should I just go with the flow and deal with them not wanting to be on a schedule?

:headbang:

 

You are not doing anything wrong! Don't think of it as a schedule, think of it as a routine. You probley do the same thing everyday. The times may be different, but it is the same. We don't have a schedule, just a routine. It works for us!

We just do the eat, play, sleep routine and I wait for the boys to cue me in when they are ready for bed. Sometimes it is 6:30, sometimes its 7:30...

Good luck,
Jenn

 

as previous pp said - i am sure you aren't doing anything wrong... different things work for different babies!

i have lots of questions though... when you say it is hard to adhere to... do you mean you give in and not put them in bed (or wherever) to nap? them getting hungry sooner between meals... do they stop eating and just don't want more and then get hungry sooner? or have you tried increasing the amount of milk they get? our schedule works great for us but that doesn't mean they always nap when they are in their bed, but i don't go get them if i hear they are 'chatting' and i do let them fuss a bit. they usually wear out and fall asleep.
are you giving solid food between milk feedings? that might help the hunger factor. we are napping less lately and getting ready for bedtime is sometimes a booger... i am sure you have tried all of those things... but here is our schedule if you need a game plan...
6 = wake & eat 8 oz milk
8 = cereal and fruit
8:30 - 10 = nap
10:30 = 6 oz milk
noon = veggies & whatever for lunch
12:30ish - 2 = nap
2:30 = 8 oz milk
6 - 6:30 = bath and or ready for bed; 8 - 9 oz milk

good luck!
Lezlie

 

I mean that if I try to keep the girls up until 7 pm that they will get tired at 6, so adhering to any plan always backfires. Some days they can do the 2-3-4 schedule and others they barely make it 1.5 hour between naps. The girls eat in-between meals and right now they are getting 3 solid meals a day with a hearty snack water/juice in the late afternoon. They currently drink 7 oz of formula and don't ever drink more when I offer it.

I never go in their bedroom if they are just chatting during naps. Their first nap is usually 2 hours long (there are those days when it's not). Their second nap has been a complete disaster. Today I put them to bed after 2.5 hours of being up and they didn't sleep at all. I even let them CIO for over an hour and finally gave up after listening to them cry on and off for that long. They are definitely not ready to drop their second nap as they get very cranky very early in the evening.

Lately I feel like I'm not doing something right...everyday is a total guessing game for me.

 

I think you just have to find what works for you & the girls. Some babies thrive on a schedule, others do much better with a little looser routine. As someone who really likes having a schedule, I understand how frustrating it can be to not have one, though. :hug:

 

I can understand why you're frustrated. I think it's normal that they are not always hungry at the same time. Mine also wake in between 6-7 p.m. I think it's fine if they are waking within the same hour time frame every morning.

I've had a really hard time with naps, especially with my DS. He is still taking 30-45 minute naps almost all the time. DD is finally napping better. I am experimenting with the 2,3,4 schedule right now, but so far, DS is still taking short naps. I'm not sure what advice to give about the second nap. That's great that they're taking a good first nap. I think they will probably need 2 naps for quite some time.

 

Have you tried EASY? (Eat Activity Sleep You) My babies have always done well with that. Now that they're older, their morning nap is shorter so they end up having more activity time after it before they have lunch and their midday bottle, but for us it does help to have a routine. It's always been flexible though; we do things at roughly the same time every day but it can vary by as much as 1/2 hr in either direction.
Hope you're able to find something that works well for your family!

 

Their schedule is so wonky, but they pretty much follow the EASY routine. For instance, today the girls woke up at about 6:45 and didn't take a nap until almost 11 only to wake 30 minutes later to eat, play some more, and then off to nap again which lasted almost 3 hours. After that, they ate again and stay up until 7:30. IDK, I guess I can try to go with the flow, but I think it would make everyone's lives a lot easier if we were on a schedule.

 

I would try to keep naptimes fairly consistent. HSHHC really recommends naptimes around 9 and 1. Ours are sometimes as late as 10 or 2, but no later than that. I think consistency can be good because if they're up too long at a time and get overtired, that really messes things up.

 

I'd say if you want a schedule, and you think the babies will do better on one, than try it for a few days! I started ours out on a schedule around 3 months, and then changed it a bit when they hit about 6 months. I observed what they were doing, and when they wanted to sleep and started to work around that. Mine take two naps (sometimes 3) around 9 a.m. and 1 p.m. (and sometimes 5 pm) If they wake up early from a nap they stay in their beds until at least an hour has elapsed. I am a schedule person, and I would go crazy if they were not on one....that being said, it does make it harder to go anywhere, and be more flexible....BUT if we do get off schedule it is easier to get back on one...

I don't think there is anything wrong with having your kids on a schedule. Then you know what to expect and so do they!

Here is our schedule if you need something to look at:
630-7 am Wake up
7am Bottle
8 am Breakfast
9am Nap (usually until 1030)
11am Bottle
1145 Lunch
1 pm Nap (usually until 230 or 245 on good days!!)
3pm Bottle
315-5 We usually go out and do something fun!
530 Dinner
7 Bottle and Bed

Of course, everything within reason...sometimes varies by 10-15 minutes....Hope that helps!

 

Ours is about the same, but some days I feel like I could have written the original post. Sometimes, they're just off. Things like doctor's appt, teething and colds can all throw them off too. Don't beat yourself up about it. It is what it is. I have one who naps beautifully in the car and the other will throw a fit, so sometimes she doesn't get a good nap if we just have to get out and I deal with the results later. I can't say that I remember my mom having me on a schedule at this age, and neither will your kiddos. Do what works for you! :clapping:

 

we've made it to 16 months and still dont have a real schedule... my girls still pretty much run the show. i admit that i didn't try terribly hard to nail them down to a schedule when they were younger, i just kind of dealt with things as they came because i work night shift so my own schedule is all messed up. good luck to you, i've heard that fairy tales can come true... lol, just a dream for me though.

 

I really don't know what schedule is when it comes to my babies. I think that babies are human beings not robots. some day they simply sleep more than others. other day they would like to be cuddled and play though it should be their nap time...

Also, after my DH comes back from work at 6:00 PM and when our sons stayed all day long in the house, I simply like them to go out a bit. sowe take them to shopping mall around 8:00 PM or for a walk in the city and sometimes don't get back until 10-11 PM.

Of course when they will grow up and start going to school there should be a schedule then. But at the current stage, I can't figure it out.

 

this is all so very reassuring...thanks so much! today was another crazy day, but they were out with their grandparents for most of the it. you gals are right though...i think going with the flow sounds like a better idea instead of trying to push for a schedule. they don't seem that interested in doing the same things everyday at the same time, so I guess a little adventure couldn't hurt.