Spinoff - They are Horrible!

Okay - I don't know if it gives me relief that I am not the only one out there after reading the other posts from "They are Horrible!" OR if it makes me worry more that it may not get better for a long while! From what I could gather - most everyone who responded had kids around the 2 1/2 year mark. Mine are only 16 months!!

Kate is being my good little one right now, but Abby is going to wear me out. I put them down for naps early today because I couldn't take it anymore!! She has several melt-downs a day - and was sick this past week with a virus (and to top it off, she had fainting spells for a few months as well) so I know she has been "babied" a little more. But we are expecting in Dec, and as I get a belly on me, I am not going to be able to carry her constantly (like she prefers).

Sunday night she cried for 10 - 15 mins after dinner and just couldn't get control of herself. I let her cry it out last night before dinner, and it took a few minutes, and then she was great! And then again this morning - several times (in a one hour time span!!) and she did fairly good. Kate just looks at her and tries to pat on her! It drives DH crazy and he thinks I cater to them ALL the time when he's not there. We also have a nanny 2 days a week when I work, and it breaks her heart when Abby cries, and so she gives in much quicker. She & I talked about it again last night.

They do great, for the most part, when we are out and about. They have more toys than they know what do with - and yet, it doesn't seem enough??? This has been building for a few weeks/months - it all runs together, so it's not anything new, but it seems to be getting worse. We are back & forth between 2 naps and 1 so I know that's not helping either.

Sorry for sounding so whiney and so long-winded - I just don't know what to do. They are too young for time out - right? Any other suggestions or offerings of hope? Ahhhhhhh!

Thanks!

 

I wish I had some suggestions for you but I'm kinda going through it myself. Our twins seem to be about the same age. Lorien lately has just been going into melt down mode for EVERYTHING it seems like. She wants to be picked up and held constantly. When I am in the kitchen, she will grab onto my pants and just follow me as I pull her along to get to the fridge or the sink and it's quite aggravating. I find myself saying constantly to her, "Just RELAX Lorien!!" Not that she understands what the heck it means but I think it's probably more for me The incessant whining can really get to you but I too am just letting her go through her motions and I walk away and she calms down after a minute or two. But often I have to pick her up and hug her and tell her I love her because I don't want her to feel that I am rejecting her. DH and I were discussing it this morning and we think maybe she is having seperation anxiety but she is also teething and I think that it could quite possibly have to do with her 15 month shots. The Ped said that she can get a fever anytime from 1 week to 5 weeks after the shots and sure enough about a week after, she had a pretty high fever for about 2 days and was just really off. I'm wondering if her crankiness has to do with that? I don't know what to offer you other than the most famous saying around here "you're not alone." Hope it calms down for you asap (and for me too )

 

I don't really have any suggestions, but Jack went through a period for a couple weeks around that time where he was down right horrible. I think it was just teething, because he's back to his happy self. When he'd throw his tantrums, I'd just leave the room and let him get over it. If I tried to confort him, it just seemed worse. All I can say is I hope this is just a phase for you!

 

Oh my gosh, you SO just described my Tony at that age!!!

Do you think she's just too tired??

We found that the ONLY thing that worked for Anthony was to let him cry. Not quite CIO, we would hold him and try to soothe him, but the kid just NEEDED to cry! He has sensory issues and was very late in developing language skills and at that point, crying seemed to be his only way to express his frustration...and we can all relate to needing a good cry Maybe it wasn't the right thing to do, but it was the only thing we tried that helped at all. We would hold him and let him cry his tiny head off and it usually lasted a few minutes, then he was fine. he'd eat, sleep, play....whatever....as soon as he had all that frustration out of his system.

I hope it gets easier!! I wish I had good advice, but heck...I was the one who posted that they are horrible!!

 

Mine were pretty challenging around 16 months. It got worse for a little while, but is now getting better (starting around 19 months) as they learn to communicate better and remember things from one minute to the next.

Also, I have learned how to deal with their fits and tantrums -- sometimes by actually doing something, sometimes by just letting them have a fit. In those situations, I'll often say "Oh, do you need to have a fit now?" in a very pleasant tone of voice as if I'm offering them a cookie. I don't know if it has any effect on them, but it helps me remind myself that it's normal and it doesn't mean anything's wrong.

Plus, if Abby has been sick, that could have a lot to do with her behavior. I've finally learned that when I am absolutely tearing my hair out over someone's behavior, she's probably about to get sick.

 

Thank you all so much. And of course, they were angels the rest of the day! Thank heavens.

 

Glad yours were. We called today "the day of a thousand spankings" (not that we actually spanked them all day, but that we felt they needed them all day... believe me, we reserve even a light tap on the hand only for serious infractions), because I swear the two of them tag teamed me all day, doing whatever they knew they shouldn't do. Climbing stairs (they climb the OUTSIDE of the stairs, the 2 in protruding beyond the banister), ruining blinds, standing on chairs, etc. etc. I can't wait till I can try some real discipline, like 123 magic! They were real stinkers today.

 

I'm kind of in the same boat - Skylar is very laid back (most of the time) and Riley needs to be held constantly. She will walk around the house with her arms up in the air for someone to pick her up and whine the whole time. Sometimes I just feel so bad when I look into her face that I pick her up (which I know doesn't help) but I just can't resist her puppy dog eyes and sometimes the whining annoys me and it's just easier for me to pick her up so it stops. Any suggestions to stop her whinning without driving me crazy would be appreciated. Thanks