Soon to be a single mom

Hello Twinstuff Community,

You've always been good to me, and I always keep running back when times are low. I have been making the majority of the income in my family and doing the majority of the work and I'm tired. Lately, my husband has been erratic, angry, and cold, and I feel I have no choice but to tell him I don't want to be married to him anymore.

I could run down the list of offenses, but I'm just tired. It's just over, and it's hard to grasp. I don't know how he's going to react. And despite all the evidence to the contrary, he tells me he loves me and our kids and wants to be together forever. His actions tell a different tale.

This is hard with such small children, and I never wanted to be the one to get divorced. Even worse, I never wanted to be the one to put up with a bad situation so long.

Thanks for your support, as always. If anyone has any sage advice on the steps to take before separation, please let me know.

 

Awww honey im sorry to hear this. I just wanted to send you some big :hug: and tell you to keep your chin up x

 

Soo sad I'm soooooo sorry to hear this. Every time I hear about a marriage ending (which is INCREASINGLY more often it seems) I feel like crying.

I also believe that when it's over- it's over.

HUGS and we will always be here for you so stick around.

 

:hug: That is terrible. I am so sorry to read this. Have you considered marriage counseling or some therapy for yourself to see if you can work things out? Having young twins definitely put a strain on our marriage. :hug:

 

Big giant :hug: I am so sorry that you are going through this. My only advice to you is to get all the support you can from family and friends. Big :hug: to you during this difficult time.

 

I am so sorry and wanted to send :hug: your way. My sister went through this 2 years ago. About 6 months after my nephew was born my BIL started acting weird, turned out he was having an affair. He then told my sister in marriage counseling that she tricked him into getting pregnant; you went through 10 IUI's and 2 IVF's, but she tricked you, OK.

She is now doing much better. It was rough in the beginning and being a single mom is tough, but she is so confindent now and doesn't take any crap from anyone. They try to be nice to each other for my nephew's sake, but she won't let him treat her like a doormat anymore.

Good luck to you during this difficult time. I was a child of divorce and then watched my sister go through it. It is just so sad for everyone involved, but you also need to be happy and do what is right for you and your kids.

 

I'm sorry to hear this :hug:. I would suggest couseling too, if you haven't done this already. Of course, I don't know what you've been through. Like pp said, keep your chin up :hug:.

 

I am so sorry you are going thru this :hug:. I agree w/ pp's about counseling... With or without him. Talk to your family doctor, friends or clergy for a recommendation. :hug:

 

:grouphug:

I agree that counseling would be great - even if only to help you cope. I would imagine it would be important to get a good attorney and ensure that your interests are well-represented, too. Things don't have to get nasty but you need to make sure that the legal arrangements are fair to everyone. That's probably common sense, but I know when stress sets in in situations like this it can be hard to sort things out (hence the counseling ).

Most of all, make sure you are taking care of yourself. Find and surround yourself with supportive, loving people who won't add extra stress to your life. If you aren't taken care of, you can't take care of your kids... so make sure you prioritize your own health and happiness. A lot of people won't do this - during a stressful time or not - but it's so important, especially during such a stressful event.

:hug: We're here for you!

 

:hugs: So sorry you have to go through this!

 

:hug: Im so sorry you´re going through this. Having twins puts a lot of strain on a marriage, I know it has on mine. I hope you are able to talk and sort things out. We´ll be here for you. Be strong. :hug:

 

Sorry to hear that you are dealing with this. Hope that you can figure out what is going to be best for you and your family. :hug:

 

First off, big hugs to you :hug: Divorce is such a big step, I'm sure you are at your ropes end. But before you take the big dive, I want to agree with other pp's, try counseling first. Sometimes just having a mediator to help with communication can make a world of difference. I know you are in a tough spot and I wish you the best. :hug:

 

:hug: :hug: I'm sorry you have to go through this.

 

So sorry to hear that you are having problems. I hope that with some kind of counseling you can find help that you need whether for yourself or for your marriage. More :hug: for you!

 

I am so sorry, it is so difficult to do things when it is one sided. Hugs to you!

 

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I hope that you can resolve things... counseling is the only thing I can offer... even if he won't or doesn't go with you, it will do you good to talk through things with someone. I also hope that you are able to get good support from family and friends. good luck.