Slightly overwhelmed nanny to twins needs advice

Hi mothers...I am a nanny for six month old twin boys. I am looking for any advice from twin mothers. I am the first non-familial caregiver for the boys, up until my being hired, their parents took the "divide and conquer" approach with the boys. So now, each baby is used to having undivided attention from caregiver (who is now, me). As I am sure you all know, it is quite impossible to give both babies full attention all day...if I am holding one (to feed or try to soothe to sleep) the other starts to fuss because he wants to be held also.
The babies are not easily soothed, they do not like swaddling, pacis, swings, etc. I am a bit at my wits end with ideas of how to soothe both at one time, and get them both to sleep at the same time. They are not on the same sleep schedule either.
If any more experienced, wiser mothers have any advice...I would greatly appreciate it!
P.S. I have not spoken to my employers about this yet, I thought that after a time of adjustment it would get better once I learned their schedules and personalities, but it isnt getting any better.

 

I'd check out the birth - one year on this site instead... sorry you got the 1- 4 year olds here. I'd recommend starting from scratch and up at 6:30 or 7 am (get them both up) Lots of light, get them playing -- rolling around on the floor on a big blanket, mix up the toys every day, if they get fussy distract them with a toy then back into bed for a nap 2 hours later. Yes only up for 2 hours. So time their meals into this. Put on music or white noise to get them to sleep, lavender oil on the sheets (or that bedtime lavender johnston & johnston stuff). You could separate them and have one nap in a portacot while the other is in a different room in the crib, until you get them into a better schedule ... Always change them before bed. So in bed, they have been fed, and changed. Let them cry a bit. Watch the clock otherwise it seems like forever. Nothing wrong with a 15 min cry. Leave the room and don't let them see you come back in to check on them. If after 15 mins, you can recheck them give them a bit of a back rub and leave again.

At this age often naps are 9 am and 1 pm. Give or take for early risers and shorter AM naps. Write down on paper so you know yourself what you will do at each hour.

Some books we have read.. Happy sleep habits healthy child.

Hope this helps.

Heather

 

I have boys who were the same not great sleepers, no paci's, swaddling, etc. they were very hard to please let alone at the same time. They didn't sleep through the night until 10 months. At 6 months my day consisted of keeping them stimulated and rotating them with things to do that would last around 20 minutes at a time. For instance I would rotate them with their bouncers, play gyms, jumperoos, swings, take a walk, bath, etc. That way if one was not happy I could concentrate on them...one liked the swing and would nap while the other would only stay in it for a few minutes. I also feed mine with a boppy on either side of me, I sat in the middle and they both got to eat at the same time you can also do this with couch pillows, then burp one at a time. I highly recommend getting them on the same schedule it will take a few days maybe even a week but I would be consistant and get them on the same nap/feeding schedule or you will burn out. GL!

 

Yikes! I think you have your work cut our for, but I am sure it can be done. I agree that you should try to wake them at the same time and start that way. Goodluck, wish I could help....

 

I would sit down and talk to the parents as they might be able to help you out.

Dianna

 

I agree with the previous posters, pick a day and start fresh with a schedule that you create and like. Wake them at the same time in the morning and feed them at the same time. Do you have boppy pillows? Those are great for bottle feeding two at once - you can prop each baby in his own pillow and sit in front and hold two bottles at the same time. At six months old, babies should only be awake 1.5 - 2 hours at a time. Try putting them down exactly two hours after waking and see if that works. Also, ask your employers if they can get you a baby sling so you can wear one while holding the other - that helped me calm fussiness some of the time. I could walk around the house and point things out without trying to hold two wiggly babies.

Good luck - this can be done! I was at home all by myself with my daughters at that age. It was difficult, but possible... !

 

Work on getting their schedules synchronized. It is much easier when they are both on the same schedule, especially when they nap at the same time, it gives you a little down time to refresh. The other advice I have is that sometimes you just simply need to accept that you can not meet both their needs simultaneously. Sometimes one will just have to fuss while you tend to the other. Sometimes you have to make a decision as to which baby's needs are greater at the moment and tend to that one first. Sometimes the personality of the babies makes it easy to decide, you may have one that is much more patient about waiting, so you find it easier to tend to the other first most of the time. Sometimes, one baby just has to cry while you manage the other's needs and that's the way it will have to be. I know that a fussing baby goes right to our core, and our instincts is to try and keep them happy, but you are out numbered. It gets easier.

I agree with the poster who said discuss this with the parents. You all need to be on the same page about their schedule, and they must understand that you are one person caring for two babies as opposed to two parents with one baby each to tend.

 

Work with the parents to try to get a schedule or routine established. At 6 months old I rotated them thru toys and activities and we followed eat-sleep-play. They'd have bottles (you can feed both at once if you prop them both on boppy pillows), then they'd fall asleep. When they woke up we'd play- we rotated thru exersaucer, activity mat, blanket with toys, walker, and bouncy thing (the thing that goes in the doorway). I played music, talked, read, etc etc to them while they played. GL!

 

Hi. Thanks for all the great advice. I tried to keep them on the same schedule as best as possible today, it was a bit better...the only conflict there is that one likes to take "power naps", 20 or 30 mins. and the other sleeps pretty well, but that was okay. The family lives in the downtown area here in Sacramento, so we went on one really long walk in the am and another long walk in the pm, I timed the walk right after bottles, so if they fell asleep they wouldnt wake up hungry. The day actually seemed to go better, lots of fussies out of one around 4pm, but I tried swaddling him (a longshot, i thought, since their parents said they dont like it, but he actually calmed down) I put him in the swing and after a few minutes he calmed down and fell asleep. I will certainly talk to the parents about the schedule as well as letting them "cry it out" for naps, im pretty sure the parents are opposed to it, as they want me to rock both of them until they are asleep. Thanks again for the great advice...I really appreciate it.

 

QUOTE(scraig @ Aug 19 2008, 08:47 PM) [snapback]937949[/snapback]
the only conflict there is that one likes to take "power naps", 20 or 30 mins. and the other sleeps pretty well, but that was okay.


You may want to try to see if you can get the one that wakes after 30 minutes to go back to sleep. Mine usually wake after 40-45 minutes. If I go in and soothe them, rub their heads, tummies, give their pacifiers, they usually go back to sleep. If they are especially crabbly, but not going back to sleep, I'll rock them or put them in the swing because I know they still need sleep. Sometimes though, nothing works and they are awake until the next nap. But it's worth a shot, especially to help keep their naps in sync.