Sleep issues, please help!!! (long, sorry!)

I really need some help with getting my son down to sleep at night. I've tried everything and nothing seems to work. Has anyone else had this problem???

My sons are five months old. Chase goes to sleep at 7:30 with no fuss at all. He wakes to eat at 4:30 am and again at 7:00 am. Easy as can be. His brother Tucker is the complete opposite. Although he is often exhausted and nodding off at 6:00,I can't seem to get him to sleep.If can get him to sleep by 8:00 pm I'm really lucky. Then, almost every night, he is awake again in 1/2 hour. At that point, he acts fully awake and not the least bit interested in sleeping. It is often 10:00 or later before we can get him down again. Then, he is up to feed several times during the night.

I don't mind the night feedings too much. I expect them to last a while becuase the babies are exclusively breastfed. However, the night wakings often mean another round of struggling to get him back to sleep.

We have tried the swing, driving him in the car, wearing him in a carrier, swaddling, rocking and CIO. Nothing seems to work for more than a day or two. For us, CIO made things worse instead of better so I don't think I want to pursue a solution that includes letting him cry. I bought "Healty Sleep Habits" as well as "The no Cry Sleep Solution." No one seems to address what to do with a child that just doesn't seem sleepy at appropriate times.

I know that he must surely need more sleep than he is getting. Today, even with a two hour nap, he hasn't gotten more than 11 hours of sleep in the last full day. That just can't be enough for a tiny baby! Not to mention the fact that I need a lot more time to myself and with my husband. I can't just let baby stay up until he gets darn good and ready to sleep!

PLEASE HELP!!!

 

I really need some help with getting my son down to sleep at night. I've tried everything and nothing seems to work. Has anyone else had this problem???

My sons are five months old. Chase goes to sleep at 7:30 with no fuss at all. He wakes to eat at 4:30 am and again at 7:00 am. Easy as can be. His brother Tucker is the complete opposite. Although he is often exhausted and nodding off at 6:00,I can't seem to get him to sleep.If can get him to sleep by 8:00 pm I'm really lucky. Then, almost every night, he is awake again in 1/2 hour. At that point, he acts fully awake and not the least bit interested in sleeping. It is often 10:00 or later before we can get him down again. Then, he is up to feed several times during the night.

I don't mind the night feedings too much. I expect them to last a while becuase the babies are exclusively breastfed. However, the night wakings often mean another round of struggling to get him back to sleep.

We have tried the swing, driving him in the car, wearing him in a carrier, swaddling, rocking and CIO. Nothing seems to work for more than a day or two. For us, CIO made things worse instead of better so I don't think I want to pursue a solution that includes letting him cry. I bought "Healty Sleep Habits" as well as "The no Cry Sleep Solution." No one seems to address what to do with a child that just doesn't seem sleepy at appropriate times.

I know that he must surely need more sleep than he is getting. Today, even with a two hour nap, he hasn't gotten more than 11 hours of sleep in the last full day. That just can't be enough for a tiny baby! Not to mention the fact that I need a lot more time to myself and with my husband. I can't just let baby stay up until he gets darn good and ready to sleep!

PLEASE HELP!!!

 

I guess my first question would be when you say he is nodding off at 6 do you put him to bed at 6 or have him stay up until 7:30 so he can go to sleep with his brother? If you are having him wait then I think that may be the problem. I know 6 seems way early to put him to sleep and it stinks, especially if you are a working parent because you feel yuo don't get to spend enough time with the baby, but once I gave in and stopped trying to keep my girls awake they slept much better. It may take a night or two for him to get adjusted, but believe me, it's worth it. My girls go to bed every single night between 6 and 6:30 and I can't tell you how much better bedtime has been. They used to scream every single night. They still wake up once a night between 3 & 4, but then they go back to sleep until 6:30 or 7. Now I just need to figure out how to get rid of that night waking!

 

I agree with pp about putting them down at 6-6:30.... we were trying so hard to keep them until 7:30, so dh could spend time with them, but we were running into similar problems like you, they got sooo tired that they couldn't sleep, and they woke up earlier in the morning. Now we start the bedtime routine around 6ish and by 6:30, everyone is in their cribs and they sleep til around 7 the next day. It seems early but it's what they need right now, and I am enjoying too...I know one day they will want to stay up later. Are you doing a night time routine with them? GL!

 

I have been keeping him up until 7:30 or later so far. I'm staying home and my husband gets home from work pretty early so and early bedtime would be fine with us. The problem is that Tucker treats 6:30 as naptime instead of bedtime. He goes down and then is right back up. So, if I start the bedtime routine earlier (bath, book, nurse, rock or wear to sleep) and get him down earlier, what can I do to help him to stay down?

Last night, he was up every hour and I don't think he's having a growth spurt. He's cranky and yucky to deal with today and so am I!!

 

My guess is that Tucker is overtired and does not know how to get himself back to sleep when he wakes.
Does he have a nap routine? I would first try to make his second nap later.
Maybe you could compromise on the bedtime and try for 6:45. One thing that helped my son was him learning to get hiomself back to sleep. I really had to work at it, by rubbing his back and "shh" without talking to him or picking him up. He slowly began to learn how to sleep and stay asleep. I spent a lot of time in the nursery, but it was well worth it. (I believe these issues were around 5 months). I remember the struggle and insanity of it all!
I also think that as they get older and patterns develop, sleeping gets better.
Remember...just when you think you have it figured out - they will change

 

It may take several nights to notice a difference. Don't give up. Has this been a consistent behavior or just in the last few weeks? Maybe he's developed an ear infection?

 

Gilbert_Mommy, Tucker has always been prone to waking up about 30 minutes after he was put down to sleep. He also tries to stay up at late as he possibly can. It has gotten a bit worse lately but personally, I think that is a reaction to the CIO we tried last week. I've also recently been trying to avoid having him fall asleep while eating and that may have something to do with it.

Ear infection is always a possibility though, I'll have to watch for symptons. Someone also suggested reflux but he doesn't do much spitting up so I'm not sure about that either.

Thank you so much for the suggestions, please keep them coming!!

Michelle

 

We followed Twelve Hours Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old by Suzy Giordano, and it's great - both of my babies sleep 12 hours through the night, even my *challenging* one, Kate. Her basic principle is to first make sure the baby is eating all he needs during the day, so he won't need any night feedings, then establishing the good sleep habits from there. I like this book particularly because it tells you exactly what to do if you are nursing or formula feeding, and has great suggestions for what to do if you have multiples.

I agree with starting the bedtime routine earlier. We start around 6pm, sometimes 5:30 if the girls are really cranky, and the girls are asleep by 7. Any later than that and we have a mess.

Have you started solids yet? You might see a big difference when you start.